Sometimes I wonder if you'll end up hurting me emotionally like all the other's did before you
Maybe it will be silent but fast or be dragged out to the point where my heart is broken
I'm feeling like I'm in a daze that I never truly can escape from
Or someone else might take you away from me
Either way, just close my heart in a glass case and if worse comes to worse and you find yourself wanting to break it into bigger pieces than the ocean
Then take the last days of our love and make me feel loved and dare I say cherished one last time
But be sure to give me closure don't open the door and slam it in my face without telling me why
I beg of you please don't make me cry about how much I regret letting you into the point of no return
Don't make me associate your name with salty wet tears
And wishing I had never let you in

the pain and sadness
echoed across your ****** features as quick as
stop signs switching from stop to go
it was there for a split second
You didn’t want me to notice
But I noticed
All I  could think at that moment was
I’m sorry that the words I’m about to say can’t ease your pain

I almost let it slip
How I am a poet who writes intensely
Passionate and all at once
I'm not used to having a muse
Or the possibility of writing for someone
Writing my feelings about someone's love for me
It scares me to no end how easily the words flow when I think of you
I'm tempted to not write about you
Only because of the past
How they all fell in love with the words that dripped down from my mouth
Endlessly then all at once almost like a rose blossoming
I wrote for so many people
Only to have them turn right around and hurt me deeply
Making me delete the poems and poetry
I guess I'm terrified of that happening with us
I don't want it to
I love writing about you but I also realize that
I'm not about to make someone a home to come home to
If that makes sense
I've done that with numerous people only to be
the one who's left in the dark
Because what people don't tell you is
when you try and make a house out of a person
It can start off as loving, beautiful, thriving
But over time the idea and how the person
might view you will change over time
No one announces these things of course
But unfortunately when a person decides to
throw in the towel without a reason or stop loving you
It comes as a shock and then the idea of having that one person who you consider to be your house so to speak
One to come home to when things get too much or a person who you love so intensely it even catches you off guard
It all fades away
After they stop loving you
Reasons why I'm scared to love you so intensely and the way I'm trying to force myself
to love someone like I did before with the gestures
But it'll take a little while for me to even consider showering you with crafts
Only because if it mysteriously crumbles
I don't wanna have to look at damage control
I'm sorry baby you'll have to prove that
you'll stay first and won't abandon me
Like the others, before you did

my love
my love is too much sometimes
at times it can be overflowing
people have come and gone in my life
at first I thought maybe I loved them  too hard
or  the way I love in general is too much
should I change the way I love people
love a little less
withdraw my affection
become distant
but then I realized that if I do that it will end up confusing everyone
after all everyone knows that I’m an affectionate person
I go above and beyond
affectionate wise
little gestures that I do
to make them happy
but why would I embrace a foreign feeling
just because people distance themselves from it
to make that person happy
it would be changing the way I love completely  
and if we’re being honest with each other
I’m used to loving too much
so I’ll continue loving people too much
my  love might be too much for some people
but I know one day it will be just enough for someone
that’s why I won’t change the way  I love a person

dew drops in the spring  
the sun is shining
I'm running towards my mom even though the time has come for me to say goodbye for graduation
I try to focus on the day that is graduation
But everything is a blur
I zone out until my name is called
I walk across the field
feeling proud, accomplished
But I can't help but cry
as I try and not trip on my small gown
I spot you in the crowd
All I can think of at that moment is the memories that we've created
and the way we're all huddled up
I cry one because I'm leaving the group behind
making my way in this word
adulting
still a newbie at heart
learning through trial and error
But know this
no matter where I go in life
I'll always treasure you and the memories that we made
my senior year