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Sarah Aug 2016
I get shot with two worded responses that shatter my bones
I'm a mess on the inside
Bullet wounds are visible aren't they???????
I cant see the entree wounds but God ****** I can feel pieces of my ribs puncturing my lungs
I heave up blood, and gasp for air
I can tell from the look in your eyes you are losing your light
Were cracked and bruised
I keep putting super glue in the cracks to try to hold us together for the time being
But it isn't the same as it was before? Is it?
It's like we're trying to read our story out of a book
And shoving certain pages down each other's throats
Suffocating lullabies
I want it this way and you want it that way
It's like putting ketchup in milk
A never ending battle of trying to love the other right but never succeeding
A reversed fairytale
Sarah Jun 2016
It's been three months since
And maybe it'll take thirteen to get over me hurting you so bad
I punish myself on a daily basis
Shoving knives into my rib cage
Trying to reach my heart so I can feel how you felt when I broke you down
I'm beginning to think I lost my heart a long time ago
And I was using yours for the time being to feel some sort of love again
And while doing that I tore you apart
How could I ever forgive myself for what I've done to you
I want to ***** at the thought of my hand on your face
Because I know I wasn't touching you gently
I was forcing a hard blow to your soft cheek
Where I should have been planting a kiss
You loved when you should have hated
But You deserve the best things in the world
And I deserve to be lit on fire from head to toe with guilt
I am sorry
  May 2016 Sarah
Rachael Judd
They told me I was selfish
Cause I had a bullet pressed to my head
With my name on it
They told me I was selfish
Cause I had a knife pressed against my thigh
They told me I was selfish
Cause my legs were bleeding
And I was screaming
They told my I was selfish
Cause my heart wouldn't stop hurting
They told me I was selfish
Cause my bones were aching
They told me I was selfish
Cause my note said I was leaving
They told me I was selfish
Cause they begged me to stay
They told me I was selfish
Cause I needed to go away
They told me I was selfish
  May 2016 Sarah
Joshua Haines
She kisses the boys and girls
that pay the most attention.
The boys play with vapor
and her girls play with tension.
I wish I was the only one
that she will decide to touch
but I am who I am
and, in a way, that is too much.

Sawblade-sunflower petals
wrap around an earthy cushion,
and the humidity hangs in the air
as her beige body is crumpled
and I feel too sober, pushing.

Baby yellow falls apart,
in her hair the flower starts
to trickle onto sheet and pillow,
decorating the absences
that define how hollow
she and I have felt before --
******* like an endangered species
on the killing floor, I whisper once,
I whisper sweet, "Don't you wish
that we didn't meet?"

She kisses the boys and girls
that give the most attention.
I played with vapor
and she played with tension.
And what doth she speak, O brother?

"Eternal is the damnation,
Fleeting is the mercy."
Sarah May 2016
Do you count the cracks in your teeth
After the bomb goes off in your mouth
After his lips collide with yours
Do you know that every time he touches you
He leaves pieces of himself behind
Underneath your skin
Causing wounds to form because his words are
Corroding
Do you talk words that flow like the wind
That fall from your mouth like rain
A thunderstorm of ways to describe his hand on the back of your neck
A explosive end
Sarah Apr 2016
I've listened to every voicemail you left me over 100 times each
I've written them all down on individual pages
Word for word
Because some how I think that will keep you around for a little bit longer
and I don't know why I keep puncturing my ear drums
With the sound of your voice on constant replay
But honestly I'd rather go deaf
So maybe I'll be forced to let go of what's already gone
Sarah Mar 2016
You've taught me alot, but the most important thing you had to teach me
was that when i am drowning
no one is going to be there to save me
to pull me to surface air
I must save myself
my lungs will eventually fill with the water which is keeping me under
and while my lungs fill,
I'll drown in my own damp misery
as you sit and you watch
with a grin on your face
you do not reach a  hand out
you sit still, you take in my every ****, squirm, gasp for air
as i feel my body Giving out
i'll build the strength
which you have given me
by sitting, watching me drown
I'll surface my own body
I'll breath my own air
For I have learned to live without you dear
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