I want to draw
But my mind wants to die

I want to sing
But my lungs want to drown

I want to dance
But my body wants to rot

I want to explain
But my brain wants to stop

The waking world feels false
My dreams are much better
Than reality. Even the bad dreams
Have so much more good
Than reality. Even the bad dreams
Make me much happier
Than reality. Even the bad dreams
Scare me much less
Than reality; Even the bad dreams
Are only bad
Momentarily

Life is breathed into my soul,
Against my godforsaken will.
Life is torture here, I tell you.
Breathe my life into a plant instead.
I want to be boundless, without form
Where no society can enslave me.
The iron claws of this simulacra
Takes me, breaks me, then molds me.
Like clay into a little figurine,
Doing a job that benefits no one
I know. Part of a machine that
Is always hungry.
Our purpose on earth is to fill pockets
Full of man-made coin
In a man-made world
Just so we can buy man-made "stuff";
To forget we're being
Wholly,
Entirely,
Sincerely,
Brainwashed.

Take a deep,
No, a short breath.
Do you remember what it's like
To take a deep breath?
For your lungs to fill
All the way to your head,
And to feel relief that you breathe
Life into each living cell.
Do you remember what it's like?
It's been so long.
But now you can't sing,
And now you can't scream;
The monster keeps his hands
Around your throat.

Clash-clash of swords
On swords
It's Pride Month
Yet again

Sweet little lily,
She asked me for my name.
Then once she kissed me,
I had never felt the same.

All these kisses are now poison,
Burning scars onto my cheek.
When my lily she did leave me,
I drowned down by Silas creek.

Reflectors stab my retinas
Reflecting the inside.
Thoughts crawl out of me
Ghouls of telepathy
Constantly scratching and screaming,
"Let me be free
I wish to see."

Choke them with pills and herb,
"Stay down you awful beasts"
I used to think,
Now I just feel.
Today they will see the side of me,
The side of me I want to be.
Freely and complete, truly.
Indescribably.
I will subscribe to thee,
Til' the beast can see,
This beast will be free,
"Finally"