The things you say
have impact,
great or small,
every word that leaves your lips
can hurt or help.

Squeeze out all the toothpaste
the tube.
It made a mess didnt it?
now put it back in
the tube.
you cant?

Words are like that,
once you say something
you can NEVER take it back
no matter how
big of a mess it made
or how hard you try
to fix it.

I never said
how much you meant to me
I never said
how many times I cried
I never said
it hurt being replaced
I never said
you were my escape
I never said
how much I hurt myself
by leaving
I never said
how I still feel
I never said
you replaced me
I never said
I miss you
I never said
and I never will.

All my days, I have been lost
drifting from place to place
like the fallen leaves of autumn's past.
Always moving, never settling
for too long.

The day we met was
like coming home after a very long holiday.
Coming home to a place I had never been before,
but feeling all at peace
for the first time.

My existence has been boxes and baggage
dragged there and back again.
Your voice is a comfort,
it says "unburden yourself
stay a while."
and I realize,
that to this wanderers heart
you feel like home.

She has walked alone in darkness
so long that she cannot
recall how to match pace
with another.
Cannot walk with someone
even if they hold a light
even if they are a light.
She cannot trust them
to keep her safe
in the darkness.
She knows what it feels like
to walk all alone in darkness,
to touch souls,
but not to be touched in return.

The torturous insomnia
gives way to nightmares
that chill her to the bone
and the nightmares break
leaving her empty and depressed
and she lies in the crushing darkness
sleepless and terrified.

A warrior doesn't need a therapist.
But then again a warrior doesn't cry when yelled at...

"What happened here?"
he asks
and rubs a questioning finger
over a knotted old scar.

I was hurt
in a battle against myself
a war really,
is the real answer
that I do not say.

"Nothing, just an old wound"
I say instead.

Sometimes the battles of the self
are the worse kind.
I wish he would say.

"It's okay, as long as it stays
an old wound."
He says instead.

"What inspires you?"
He asks as her eyes begin to light up
She starts thinking about
all the worlds that her imagination
has led her to
and all the places
real, and fictional,
that she longs to see.
Her mind shoots across the galaxy
and she thinks about
Poetry and Space
High fantasy adventures with elves and magic
Her eyes sparkle with stars
that could be other worlds
Far Far away
Her passions bubble up
with volcanic heat
she pictures all her heros
from Athena, to Bilbo
and he says again
"What inspires you?"
she says gently
"Are you sure you want to know?"

I can't say I'm broken
Even if I have not the strength to go on
I can't say "you've hurt me"
Even if my heart is torn and bleeding
I can't say "I hate myself"
Even if I feel it is the truest thing ever
I can't say I hate you
Even after all you've done to me
I can't say I'm depressed
Even if someone might be able to help
I can't say I need someone
Even if they need me too
I can't say I'm falling
Even if my fingers are slipping on the edge
I can't say I'm lost
Even if someone can guide me home
I can't say I miss you
Even though I feel it in my bones every day
I can't say I'm hopeless
Even if I've given up

We have unfinished business
You, Me, and the Universe.
There is something we
are meant to do together.

Some reason that the reaper
stayed his hand.
Protected us from blade and pills.
Some reason we did not move on
into that great beyond
even though we groped in the darkness
looking for the sweet kiss of death.

The reaper did not want us
because the Universe is not through with us yet.
We have something to attend to,
something that caused Charon
to refuse us voyage.

We have some grand role left to play
As lovers
As friends
As something.
The reaper does not want us
just yet.

After giving up the fight to feel
laying down all weapons
and allowing the numbness
to creep over me slowly
like ice freezing,
from the edges inward,
until my soul was fully numb.
So you will have to excuse me
if I am a little clumsy when we touch.
You will have to excuse the zombie fingers
when you try to hold my hands,
you see, they are out of practice,
as if back from the dead.
You will have to pardon
the creaks and cracks in my heart
when you try to warm it,
you see, it has not been used in a long time.