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Ifeanyi Ndolo Nov 2018
Why wouldn’t I be mad
It’s too easy being sad
Wallowing in pity
With a life so ******
A life with no meaning
My mind purely reeling
It’s no fun being last
Existing in the past
No future to envision
Stuck in this prison
In a world that’s so dark
Always missing the mark
How could I not fall
I never heeded his call
He wanted to save me
He had the key
To unlock my joy
To unearth his ploy
But I pushed back
I left my track
And continued wandering
Constantly floundering
Never finding my light
Always rejecting my right
My right to believe
It pours like a sieve
Unable to maintain form
Destructive like a storm
I think it’s done
Where’s the sun
Why can’t I see
Is this it for me
Falling over this rail
Purely born to fail
So I give
I don’t wanna live
Take me away
I won’t stray
It’s my time now
And so I bow
Ifeanyi Ndolo Sep 2018
Pow Pow*
A little boy dead,
Shot down by a cop in the street
Another victim laid at their feet,
All we see is red,
The community stricken with grief
Adding a whole new chapter to the beef,
Another trial for the world to dread,
Once again they get off scot free
Can you imagine the image that paints for me?
There are no fences to mend
This is a running trend

Welcome to the court
Officer Jones please report
He was just another ****
Just a stupid little bug
I swear he had a knife out
How could I not doubt
I feared for my life
I have a child and a wife
Why does he even matter
We should stop this useless chatter
We all know how this ends
Why bother making amends

Mr. Brown you were a witness
Could you speak on this business
I'm sad and depressed yet you ask me to speak
The child had no say he was thoroughly weak
Did a child of nine really frighten you
What other ******* would you like to spew
You saw a knife while we saw a pen
Blacks ain't never allowed to find their zen
If were not thugs and criminals y'all cant sleep
All you ever want are mindless sheep
You gun us down to have us stop
Then hold these trials that always flop

I'm mentally drained
Undoubtedly strained
You never let us rest
Always ready to be a pest
That woman there crying, despairing so loudly
His mother, his saint, wounded so soundly
That man there crying, pacing so sadly
His father, his teacher, parading so  wildly
Will you ignore their pain
And allow it to rain
Or allow them to win
To **** off one sin

Now you America its time for your trial
Just how long will you live in denial
Skeletons fill your closet
And yet you made a profit
You've destroyed our lives
But what is your prize
Your country is divided
These actions misguided
Our anger our pain
You believe they'll be slain
Be forgotten and stopped
I refuse to be dropped
To die like a dog
and lose to a false god.
Ifeanyi Ndolo Aug 2018
Man
I hate you, absolutely despise you.
But that isn't completely true.
You've destroyed my creation, rather quickly you fell.
I try to hate and despise you,
To rid myself of a mistake I created,
But I can't.
Why can I not rid myself of you
Why do I continue to care for your failures
I think I know why, but i fear that reason
If i admit it there's no return, no reprieve from your cries
So I wont say it,
I'll continue this lie, I'll believe these nightmares.
So as I said before,
I forgive you.
Ifeanyi Ndolo Jul 2018
Your heart bleeds patriotism
My heart bleeds sorrow
Your body bleeds privilege
My body bleeds suffering
Your mind bleeds ignorance
My mind bleeds in response
We are not the same nor will we ever be
But how long will it take to respect me
Why coddle me with fake pity
We know this never ends pretty
I’ll give up what you call a senseless fight
as soon as you genuinely attempt to see our plight
Ifeanyi Ndolo Jul 2018
Darkness is the absence of light
Light is the banishment of Darkness.
Never can they exist without the other.
For Light could not truly be appreciated without Darkness.
  Jul 2018 Ifeanyi Ndolo
The Calm
Holy Holy is The Lord God almighty
We stand together to sing His praise
You say you love Him, but to me I'm amazed
That you can Love God but sin against your brother,
and remain totally unphased
I can write essays about how you sit and dispraise
the opinions of  your brothers and sisters
Or sit silently with uncomfortability in your gaze
Your lack of care to the matter is unsettling, it begins to abrase
at my love for you all, it sets me ablaze
The Lord you love spoke to the woman at the well
but when you talk to me, I don't always feel as if you mean well
I'm not calling you a racist, but your uncomfortability shows
That you want diversity, without discussing adversitiy
or seeing that still the cold winds of your ancestors blows
You hide behind the politics of your mom and your dad
Trump got elected, you couldn't say you were glad
Because people in your fellowship hurt, and that's always bad
but at home there's excitement, tax dollars to be had.
you hide behind your politics. I hide behind my God,
you hide behind your privilege, I will call you a fraud
I am hungry, didn't feed me
Chained, you didn't free me
But you serve a God of the oppressed
I am thankful that He won't say that you didn't see me.
Church hurt is the worst hurt..."God fearing people" Putting politics over god, putting America over God, putting the the people of God below American values. looking at a person's papers over the God that loves them. It's deep, a "God fearing nation"....
Ifeanyi Ndolo Jul 2018
If only I wasn’t stupid
If only I wasn’t ugly
If only I wasn’t a *****
If only I wasn’t skinny
If only I wasn’t trash
If only I wasn’t insecure
If only I was a better person
If only I cared more
If only I didn’t give a ****
If only I was funny
If only I was better
If only...
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