Charmour

Charmour 3d

Untitled

"We were never lovers.
We were two addicts sharing the same poison."

But only one of us overdosed.

#lovers #sad #reality #hope

Charmour 4d

How can I hate them,
when they taught me how to love
But never loved me.

How can I hate them,
when they taught me how to care
But never cared about me.

How can I hate them,
when they taught me to live
But never cared if i died.

How can I hate them,
when they taught me to speak
But never spoke with me.

How can I hate them,
when they taught me how to shout for help
But shushed me when I tried to scream.

How can I hate them,
I don't now—
I just started to hate myself..

I don't hate them now..

#sad #hate #unloved #childhood

Charmour 5d

Hair!?

I used to cut, them inch by inch.
Everytime I was hurt,
Everytime I felt overwhelm,
Everytime I wanted to cut my sk!n.
As if removing inches, would remove memories.
As if shorter strands, could lighten the weight on my shoulders.
I cut them when I wanted a new start
Thinking I have finally let go..
But I haven't,
I still cut them.
Everytime i feel too much,
Everytime I can't let go,
Everytime I feel I'm not enough,
I just cut them
Again trying to start fresh....

Why can't I let go and start fresh..?

#sad #hair

Charmour 6d

Deeper

Sometimes I wish they hurt me physically
So that it would hurt less as days pass
It will fade of with time
But all they did was
Hurt with words
Words which had power of knife
The knife which went straight to the heart
And stabbed
Which stirred up a deep scar in the brittle heart
Nothing could ease the pain
For the reason that no one saw it
The scar was heavy
So it when deeper and deeper
Just like that deeper into an abyss

It stabbed right in the brittle heart....

#sad #toxic #childhood

Charmour May 24

Dying...

She who is afraid of sharp things
Who's afraid of needle
Who's afraid of being physically hurt
Who's afraid of getting cuts
Who cries on the smallest invisible cut
Who tries to protect herself from getting hurt
Who can't stand blood
Who's afraid of dying
Who wants to live
Who wants to explore
Who wants to be lively
Who wants to be happy
Who finds happiness in the smallest things
Is now c*tting herself
Just to know that she's alive
Just to know she isn't dead
Just to feel relieved
Just to escape her life
Just to bleed all the pain out

#dying #pain #sad #trauma

Charmour May 24

Crave

I crave for their affection
I crave for their love
I crave for their appreciation
I crave for them to love me back
I crave for them to be there for me
I crave for there to notice me
I crave for them to listen to me
I crave for their time
I crave for them to stop comparing me with my brother
I crave for the things i know I'll never get
To atleast be happy with me
But it's not gonna happen
I know it won't

I want them to love me back....

#unloved #sad

Charmour May 24

Anxiety..

I keep on getting anxious
Every second,
I try to hide it behind my smile
I try to be happy
But it just doesn't seem to stop
I started skipping meals
Not once,
Sometimes I don't eat at all
Under the table,
My shaking legs
Sleepless nights,
Tossing and turning
Cutting people off
Talking less and less
Not getting out of my room
It just seems to grow and never stop
I don't even know how do I explain this feeling
It's just killing me inside
Slowly enough
For them to not notice....

It doesn't seem to stop...

#anxiety #trauma #overwhelm #selfdoubt #tryingtoohard