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I now understand
the reason why it is called
falling in love

*because it hurts.
  Dec 2014 Rebecca Durrett
Natalie
do not date a girl
who writes.
she will internalize
everything,
carve poems
into your eyelashes
instead of
kissing them,

she will analyze you,
calculate age
from the rings
your coffee cup
leaves
instead of refilling it.

she will memorize
the way your
lips curl around steam,
but not that you
take it
two sugars,
no cream.

she will read your
palm instead of
holding it
against her chest.

she will not
blink
when you leave,
because she is
already
romanticizing it.
Rebecca Durrett Dec 2014
Hating yourself is a level
that takes a lot of pain to achieve.
To truly hate yourself, your whole life
must be swollen with bad memories.

Reliving old pain is another
level of pain that cannot be escaped.
People who relive their pain feel
that they deserve to hurt...but that's not true.

No one should hate themselves,
no matter what has happened in their life.
Every person walking the earth is
special in some way and is needed.

When someone decides that they
aren't needed, then they have decided
to stop looking at the people around them
and seeing just how many people truly care.

Depression is the monster that
sleeps under so many people's beds.
It haunts dreams and tortures the mind.
Depression is something that can ****.

Saying all of this has been hard for me because
I've struggled with everything on this list.
Depression, Suicide, Anxiety and so many other
things that affect the mind has happened to me.

Never knowing when it's going to hit is the worst part.
One day is great and the next is a sunken ship
full of heartache, tears and torment.
But, it can be fixed.

I believe that everyday you have a choice.
Everyday can be a happy one.
It's hard sometimes to try and fake the happiness
but after a while...you don't have to fake it.

I love my life and even though I've struggled with
mind crushing depression, terrible anxiety and even the
thoughts of suicide,
I still wake up everyday and am thankful for my life.

I used to believe in god and a few other religions for a while,
but every time I prayed for help...Help didn't come.
I don't say this to anger or upset anyone who is religious.
I say this because it can be done ON YOUR OWN!

I've never been to the point to attempt suicide, but
I've thought about it.
I came back from that and more
and I just hope that maybe sharing this could help someone
who is now in those shoes.

I am so grateful for my life and
all the things each day brings.
Each day I want to help someone else because I know
that sometimes all you want is for someone to care.

I care and I want to help whenever I can.
Just know that someone cares.
If you need someone to talk to please message me. I want to help anyone who needs it. Don't bottle it up because that stuff always comes back to haunt you.
  Dec 2014 Rebecca Durrett
curlygirl
Find a Poet Not a poser, not a "it's just a hobby" poet. Find one who mumbles lines as they scramble for a pen at breakfast; who shakes their head randomly when their thoughts aren't rhyming properly;  who has notebooks stashed around the house that you must never touch.
2. Listen Savor the spoken words, for those are harder to express. Keep in mind that they can't be edited and re-written, and be forgiving when a mistake is made.
3. Read The body speaks as loudly as words on a page do. When their eyes are closed or focused on the ceiling and the fingers are tapping out syllables, recognize the unique process. Respect the need for quiet, because if you look closely, you can read the poem on their face before they write it on the page.
4. Write Write your story together. Grab hold of the pen and hang on as you move across the page of life. Sometimes you will dance across, others you will be dragged. You may have to cross out a word, or a line, or a page, but don't give up. Discouragement is a poet's biggest enemy, inarticulateness their biggest fear. So end each day with a semi-colon, because the story will never end the way you think it will, and there must be room for more. There is always room for more, more words, more laughter, more tears, more love,
When you love a poet.
  Nov 2014 Rebecca Durrett
Eudora
You'll never know...
When you'll be head over heels
The most enchanting feeling in the world
Your unknown desires, it reveals
A current in you will endlessly twirl

You'll never know...
When happiness fills your heart
Having a precious bundle of joy in your arms
You'll realize in your life, he's the most important part
Not forgetting, he'll make the best morning alarms

You'll never know...
When your heart will be scrunched
Like a ball from a piece of paper
Feels like your chest is being ruthlessly punched
Your skin peeled off with a serrated scraper

You'll never know...
When a friend will turn his back
Whose hand you held, all these years
Intentionally causing an emotional attack
In disbelief, you gather invisible tears

You'll never know...
When you'll be caught in an unexpected plight
Daily reflections occur, due to lack of wisdom
To ease your dark path, you yearn for a ray of light
Nothing much you can do except to crave for freedom

You'll never know...
When the time comes, you might bleed to death
Tears will flow drowning your skin
As you breathe your last breath
You wish you had more time to atone for your sins
You'll never know what and when things will happen..
#life  #happiness  #love  #disappointment  #betrayal
#regret #pain #death
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