I woke in a pool of blood
Unaware of what had occurred
My feelings hit me like a flood
Understanding I now felt reassured

I'll never be good enough
Realising I'm use to the emptiness
I tried to stay strong and tough
But now im broken and a mess

Realising the walls I've built
So many scars to keep people away
Afraid to talk, to share my guilt
About every cut, feelings on replay

In my castle so solid made from pain
Walls all around cut me off
Never close enough to be hurt again
This may well be my last standoff

I use to think about you all the time
Now I drink because of you all the time

I use to smile because of you
Now I feel vile because of you

You were me beautiful eyes
Really you were just full of lies

I used to think of you as my sunshine
But really you were never mine

I cried when we said goodbye
Now all I want is to die

Never is such a powerful word to others
Never give up
Never leave you
Never stop loving you

Never is such a hurtful word for me
Never going to survive this
Never good enough
Never going to have you

I've never had a physical fear
I've jumped out of planes
I've played with snakes
I've let's spiders crawl all over my skin without a blink
I've walked alone at night
But right now I'm terrified

I've been so lost before
I've hurt and i've cried
I've battled darkness and lost
I've woke up every morning having to think of a reason to live
I've lost that battle before
But somehow I didn't die

I've found the my way again
Ive got my will to live
I've got reasons to fight
I've found my spark again and want to thrive in my life
I've got to do this for them
But how I'm terrified I'll break