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  Oct 2022 Amanda Kay Burke
DAF
I stole my fathers smile
He would not give it up without a fight
I do not answer when he calls
I know he'd just ask me for it back
Amanda Kay Burke Oct 2022
Tears like leaves falling to ground
Heart bleeds as days grow cold
Searching for peace that will never be found
Cannot stop missing who I used to hold
Amanda Kay Burke Oct 2022
Tell me the things you feel
Tell me as we lay torn in
bed
Tell me your wounds to heal
Tell words left unsaid

Tell me why keeping me here
Tell me otherwise I will doubt
Tell me the things you fear
Tell me when time's run out

Tell me why say nice things to me
Tell me what is your hidden motive
Tell me your love is free
Tell me the reason you selflessly give

Tell me you hear my cries
Tell me why hand you hold
Tell me what's seen in my eyes
Tell me you will not leave when I'm old


Tell me when you'll change your mind
Tell me by showing every day
Come
Tell me if you plan on leaving me behind
Tell me how really feeling today
Amanda Kay Burke Oct 2022
It's a slow road to no place I find myself on
With heavy walking feet
Time sacrificed in the break of indecision
To save myself from inhumane heat

Yet crystallized life I desperately covet
Has drained of all it's shine
Look into the mirror for answers
Every morning there are none to find

A cave of whispers shelters as I rest
The crickets keep me company
Stacked promises like stones in my breath
To dust crushed and tossed into the sea

I didn't enjoy the pain I caused
It wasn't fun to watch Mom cry
Was the perfect angel before the fall
Spiraled downwards without asking why

Stole heart with that type of life
Seemed like a movie scene
Said the word yes before I discovered
What that choice would actually mean

I thought it would taste sweet on tongue
Never guessed it would be sour
Was utterly in control before
Disappeared in the drug's power

Had me bending at slightest breeze
Ground inches from face
Too much for my weak body
Playing at such a fast pace

Always getting forced to aching knees
I am looked at like a zoo
Wrong turns reflected in eyes
Why I stopped sobriety I have no clue

Alone I travel this crooked path
Can't believe I'm here
Everything finished waiting
I waste year after year
She stands before the bathroom mirror
Creating several different faces
Tryng to find the one that doesn’t
Make her look so tired and old.

Some of them make her look ill
A couple more look silly.
The one she finally settles on:
A wan and disappointed smile -

Accepted as least ugly of the bunch
It’s not the face she’d hoped to wear
In this the Autumn of her life.
She expected some small trace
Of former beauty to remain.

She tried to make a little sparkle
To liven up her somber eyes
And find the muscle in her cheek
That lifts her lips into a grin.

A sorry rictus of despair
Was all that effort brought her
So she gave up and threw the switch
And slipped away in darkness
ljm
I remember seeing my mother standing in front of the mirror trying different ways of smiling and holding her face.;She wasn't happy about growing older. Hey...neither am I.
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2022
Yet with the hype and madness about the Coronavirus
I open window and take a deep breath breath of icy Alaskan air

The glass wearing a frosty negligee
Leaving transparent area just large enough to get a small peek at the natural show of pale snowy scenery on the other side

Eerily quiet
There is a foreboding sensation about the vacant stadium
Lone songbird whistling simple serenades to a pre-apocalyptic invisible audience
Written 3-3-20
Let them all go to Hell
I no longer care
I taste the bitter truth
of their air

I have friends in all the right
places
Far far from me

I cast this rage
upon pages
and paupers of praise

The diligence due
let them be cursed
Let their silver linings
turn lead , fall , and
crush their heads

Cheers !
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