im scared to hold his hand.
because i might fall harder
because they could say something
because he might hate me
i shouldn't look at him like that.
because i might stare forever
because they think it's wrong
because he might find out
why do i want to kiss him?
because i love the way his lips look
when he smiles as if no one sees
because when he laughs
everything else just melts away
im scared to be myself.
because i don't know how to do so
because they might judge me
because he could think im horrible
i shouldn't want him
because im supposed to want her
because they say it's wrong
because he could find out
why do i feel like this?
because it's like ive been betrayed
and it's my own mind causing it all
because i want him so badly
that im willing to be scared
and im willing to be judged
im willing to risk being ridiculed or be in a constant state of fear if it means that I'll get to kiss him just once