I gaze at him from across a sea of bowed heads.
The steady, calming voice of prayer echoing off
stained glass windows, which bring in a soft rainbowy light.
The lighting is soft, intimate,
but this distance between this man and I is not.
He is too far away.
This distance, an alluring mystery
...but also a heartbroken torture.
I long to touch this man I do not know.

Who is he?
Broad shouldered, mischievous grin, with
warm eyes that melt like caramel,
I wish I could look into them, if only for a second,
just to see what kind of soul resides within this handsome man.
For my mother always did tell me: "eyes are the windows to the soul".
I wish I could run my fingers through his hair,
which is dark, like his humor. Or so I've heard.

He walks my way, maneuvering the clusters of people expertly.
He is dressed up, snazzy like always...
as he walks by, his eyes catch mine
and his mouth quirks up
at the corner. He winks at me,
leaving me praying for the ability to breathe right.

Oh, how I long to know this man,
and kiss this man, and hold this man,
and lay in his bed in the depths of night.
His fingers entangling in mine like fresh-water kelp,
his lips my savior from drowning in the loneliness.  
Nothing else but the cricket's chirp,
moonlight's gleam, and sheet's rustle,
and the comforting warmth of his body next to mine.
I allow myself the pleasure of basking in such a bliss.

Until a blurry sun bubbles up from the horizon,
and I wake
to a pair of curious eyes drinking me in.

I wouldn't mind getting drunk off of him. No,
I would not mind one bit.

Maybe this is just a dream...
somebody pinch me so I know this is real
and not just some fantasy.

Reality pulls me back into the chasm of the church,
and as he is preparing to exit, he looks back
and we share another glance,
s t r e t c h i n g across the pews,
a lingering,
sparkling,
moment.
Searching for the cause for such curiosity
in each other's eyes.
Trying to make sense of it, I tilt my head down,
allowing myself a moment of thought.
My head snaps up, courage pulsing through my veins,
like I have just been cleansed, I feel refreshed.
I start making my way towards the doors to ask him his name,
but to my disappointment...
he is gone.

This mysterious, entrancing man has walked out.
The brightness of a rising run enveloping him,
leaving me with a mouthful of unsaid words
and a mind full of scattered imaginations.

I kneel down before God,
and pray for forgiveness
for lusting after a stranger I know nothing about
while in His presence.

And with that, shaken to my core,
I put on my mask that conceals my deepest emotions,
and go about my day like nothing ever happened.

Tell me when this horse of mine,
So adventurous and wild and fine,
Lost the reins that had kept  it's rider binded for all time.
Now without them,
Not even the horse knows where the next fork in the road will lead.
Find them, find them!
The horse's neighs slice through my destiny.
But how
Can I possibly know where to go,
When I can't even get back the reins to my own life?

We stand
two figures, strong, opposing
yet complimenting each other, like yin and yang
We stand
facing the world together
because everything is better with someone by your side
For some reason I can't explain... one day you turned away
cold as ice.
All I really wanted was your warm embrace but that's forever gone
You jumped out of my life
replaced by the infinite space between us
I'm giving up
because the ledge I stand on is solid ground
hanging over a vast chasm
doubts, words, pain, anger, broken trust
There's no way across
So we do what we do best and save ourselves
and turn away from what matters most at the other side
The one we want so desperately to save
The hopes we had of mending the bond slowly slip away
Nothing seems to help
So, we hide ourselves away, saying "There's no reason to come out"
we accept
there is no way across
some part of me knows nothing is impossible
but right now, it sure as hell feels like it

You'll always be the one
I wish I had held onto
The one I wish Time would rewind for
But Time is a funny thing
It never looks back. Its face only turned to what's ahead
Ticking away with an endless purpose
I want you back.
But things are forever changed between us.
It's sad to move on when we've forgotten what love really is
So i'll always hate to say
My love for you never could ever go away
Stuck in my heart is where you'll stay
But you're gone
you've walked away

to see you the way you see me,
reflected in the eyes of an angel,
tell me it's not just a dream
that it is possible
for me to one day soar above the skies,
wings outstretched, my hand in yours,
gliding into the endless horizon.
We could have all the world in our hands
to make whatever we choose.
We could do anything,
if only you let me fly with you.

She runs.
Where? I don't know.
What I do know, is she enters a forest.
This is no ordinary forest, with no ordinary secrets.
It belongs to the snakes.
For all eternity she will run, seeking refuge from their control,
yet she will find none.

Doomed to unhappiness and uncompleted paths, is the life she leads.

The snakes will take away everything,
slowly, until nothing of hers is left.
She has been left defenseless and alone.
Cut off from society, stripped of her confidence.

The snakes will pay.
Their blood is the revengeful cost of what they have taken from her.

So, prepare yourself, beasts.
for she refuses to succumb. And now,
she is out for your blood.

That's what you get when you mess with a free soul.
Karma's a *****, ain't it.

Just let the memories go
watch your future unroll
the past will cease entering the present
and the future?
will become your new reality.
a paradise, no longer haunted by unforgettable memories.
a kingdom, to build a new life.
a home, to find new love and be free from it's constricting binds,
who's taste has turned foul.
Oh, bitter love, soon to be forgotten in the winding breeze.
The smell of salt...
the breath of sun...
The past is now forgotten,
like footprints in the sand stolen by the sea.

In the catastrophe of broken lights,
and scrunched stripes you'll find me,
hiding from the world
seen through only the darkest of shades. +

twinkle twinkle little star*
how I gaze at you from afar
dare to reach out my hand
and hold you in my arms. +

Do you see that oil spill?
that never stops and seems to fill
and tarnish the beautiful calm,
that realm of water...
the spill isn't stopping, no, no, no
How far up will the numbers go?
Nothing seems to help, the fish are slaughtered,
brought to die from human hands and their mistakes,
****** into the aquatic band
that is tainted by that reddish murky goo.
The animals hide with fear,
for they, only they, can softly hear,
the crying songs of the fallen
that tear through the deep blue.

i open my eyes
to all the silent flakes falling
ever so gracefully,
amung the dusty mountain peaks.
icy friends lay
on my eyes, my hair, the ground
happily melting away
into frozen nothingness.
it is cold, but i find comfort,
in natures snowy blanket
and as I gaze up
from my place on the ground,
i grow sleepy, and my eyes close.
Just as i drift off to sleep,
winters cold breeze whispers
it's mystic melody
that seeps into sleeping ears
of every living creature around.
everything is quiet, as it first was,
in the very beginning.
No time to wait, just sing.
No one to listen, just play.
And so, nature begins its song. +