She wanted to smoke cigarettes
So she asked her older sister's friend

She wanted to go to that concert
So she bought a fake id

She wanted to ****
So she told the boy he was in luck
He obliged
Of course

She always gets what she wants
The world loves her

She turned 21
And things stopped being fun
So she threw out her fake
And didn't need her sister's friend

She bought a *** toy
So she didn't need the boy

But even still
She wanted to die
So she took some pills

And people cried when they realised
*The world stopped loving her

"it doesn't even hurt"
she told  me
"what's the point
if it doesn't even hurt?"

maybe if I had another
maybe it wouldn't be a bother
maybe if I had another
soon I will discover

bye bye bye
life that was beautiful
bye bye bye
life that was hopeful

I've come to the conclusion
my body loves being looked at
but hates attention
I decided to share this
intimate thought
with her
but she laughed
and told me there wasn't a difference

She laughed until her voice gave out,
letting his smile engulf hers.
Time seemed to move too quickly
and she did not know why
she let his cold, anxious fingertips
linger up her dress.
But he made her laugh so much
she didn't have words to speak.

She was a dreamer
who dreamt so much her heart fell
out of reality
She became hollow with a hidden brain
A brain that waits to be awakened
Sparked with the life of a five year old
To match her heart
Yet as she smoked cigarettes
and drowned herself in wine
her heart began to age
and her brain completely vanishing
She wanted to be awakened
by anyone
anything
so she chose freedom
A false concept of freedom
that she's convinced exists

She packed her bag with 75 dollars
and a letter to her mother
she didn't have the heart to leave behind
When she began taking her first steps
a smile appeared on her face
For the first time
in a long time
she felt content with herself

it is midnight on
friday and i hope she's not
thinking about him.