is this where
pain comes from

the unsettled mind
asking unanswerable

questions

millions of nasty neurons
twisting and turning

around each other
creating knots

blocking the flow
so all I can feel

is the constant need
to stretch myself

the days grow shorter
the nights bring the need for these
artificial lights

i was never half so naked
as you torturing your genius.

when you put me into poses,
made me lines and blue,
drew me over death,
sketched me skewed
atop your live-in girlfriend.

when you found your lost
love
and painted,

and when you found it less impressive,
you and that child,
sealed your cold, careless
portrait of me
behind ugly bricks,

made art of your apology,
and grace of your grace.

I want you to know
You are stronger than you think
You will be okay

Even with me gone
Hold close to our memories
They’re all you have left

Thanks for the flowers
And the bruises you left me
May they never fade

I want you to know
I loved you in so many ways
But I’m letting go

So goodbye to you
My dearest almost lover
My heart still awaits