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Promise me,
'I love you'
will never be
an
*obligation
 Aug 2015 Žõhņ Đõhņ
SLK
I am a firework
in more ways than one
I am a loud outburst of color and flame
I am intense
and I am beautiful
I am a sensation striking awe and amazement throughout crowds
of spectators
but with my beauty I am an epitome of self destruction
I was designed to ruin the relationships I have built
and the progress I have made
my flames trickle down one by one
my beauty vanishes through thin air
suddenly I become lost
what was once a journey of excitement grows old
the same as a daily commute
I loose my spark
my drive
my will
to continue any attempt of self progression
I am a continuous cycle of explosions and disappointments
I am a firecracker
light me once, I never fail to amaze your senses
though once wick has reached its end
and the fire has burned through my exterior
I am left to be nothing but an empty shell with torn wrappings
I will let my flames loose through your soul
sparing nothing but what you think to be your sanity
and my sound will tear my way through your soundproof heart
I am a firework
in more ways than one
I lack the ability to contain my absurdity
and you lack the ability to to tame my gun powder veins
from spilling through the streets of my own mind
you cannot stop me from my nature to self destruct
 Aug 2015 Žõhņ Đõhņ
SLK
Waves
 Aug 2015 Žõhņ Đõhņ
SLK
it closes in
the waves are crashing into my lungs
the salt scratches my throat
the water pulls my limbs downward in each direction
and I am not strong enough to keep the pressure from crushing my ribs

awoken with a gasp, I fumble around my bed.
missing you comes in waves of dark blue and subtle motions
most of these past few years I've been keeping myself afloat
in the middle of a scorching hot ocean
bumping over currants
and everything is peaceful; numb
until the next storm

missing you comes in waves
of dark blue and subtle motions
then the water pours again
overwhelming my thoughts

I scream for you
but my voice is muffled
a distant memory of what we created
presses its palm against my mouth
I reach for you
extending my arms towards what seems to be an unatainable surface
but you're not there
and haven't been there for quite sometime
to pull me from the waves of this drowning sea
The problem with my sadness is that I cannot explain it
to anyone.
It is so quiet, so subtle, a reminder in the back of my mind,
a gloominess overlooking all time,
and in its quietness it is unbearable,
unsharable,
a pain all my own.
 Aug 2015 Žõhņ Đõhņ
js
i hurt
 Aug 2015 Žõhņ Đõhņ
js
the drugs
don't work
like they used to.

i used to feel numb,

now
i hurt
whenever
i think about you.
Your touch brings healing,
Your voice whispers hope,
Your love makes a cold,hard heart willing,
No matter how many times we flop,
You always raise us up,
Because we are your children and we have noone else to release us from any trap.
A note to GOD.
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