.


There have been many who would criticize my motives
An abundance who would take my case to task,
But of all the souls encountered in my lifetime
Your betrayal friend would likely, be the last.

For throughout my time of living on this planet
Throughout the chaos wrought in every simple way,
Mankind has strived to put his best foot forward
And wrest the most achievement, from each day.

Through battles fought in bitterness and hatred
In trechery and lies to kith and kin,
Though blood runs rich and red through rocky gutters
Inevitably, deep down, imbues the sin.

For continents and cultures wear their frailty
It's known that Presidents and Princes often quail,
When in the face of insurmountable black challenge
They, like us, at some dark moment.... weakly fail.

From Dallas to Twin Towers on to Lockerbie
We watched the fabric of the silver curtain fray,
Crumbling man's portrayal then, to scattered ashes
From that moment on.... until this very day.

Though brave words of inspiration lift the spirit
And silken tones of oratory stroke the goal,
It seems destruction of all faith is fundamental
If betrayal slays the trust to flay the soul.

So gird thyself, steadfast, with strength and courage
Summon forth that steel within thy mind,
Garner up the cherry bonds of positivity
And lead as if, thy very eyes command the blind.

That man aspires to greatness, I acknowledge,
In conquoring great mountains to achieve...
But the factor that determines the attainment
Is his unimpeachable capacity.... to believe.

Marshalg
Foxglove, Taranaki.
3 january 2015
(After reading Ken Follett's monumental novel, "Edge of Eternity" in a straight, great, three day sitting.)

Gone is he with flourished brush
Gone to ether, turned to dust,
Left are but his remnant strokes
On canvass old, congealed with must.
Gone the Masters touch in oil
Annointed with his maddened aire,
Wilding eyes of palest blue
Strawberry his touseled hair.
Pointilism's Prince no more
Adorns high Artesanian throne,
Wretchedly we mortals weep
Where giants, once, would boldly roam.
M.

My thoughts race as I sit under a weeping willow tree. The branches firm but the leaves dangling in regret - a perfect metaphor for me. I have so much to support me, so much that should keep me standing tall, yet I wither and sway in any way that the wind wants me. I have no control as I move from place to place, external factors forcing me every which way. And while my leaves may be green with the life that is inside of me, I want so badly for my body to give up, but it betrays me. It keeps on living as if it has the passion to do so, while my mind wants nothing more than to be free.

I met a girl once, not older than nine or ten. She was wearing a little white dress with scarlet begonias running across the hem of her waist. She told me of her plan, the one she wrote up on the corner of Jefferson Street on a used paper napkin. It was brown, she said, as if having it been brown was of some sort of significance. On it she wrote her fate. Her plan was to find a raccoon, one much too wild to be sane. Once she found this rabid raccoon she would provoke it, make it agitated. Agitated enough to bite her. She wanted to acquire the rabies virus. She wanted it to course through her nervous system, advancing its way to her brain, slowly making her mad. Crazy mad, not angry mad, I asked her to clarify this for me. When I interrogated her more, eager to know why she wanted this she simply said, “I want to be like mommy.” Before I could stop her, she walked away and jumped on a bus, weak and wobbly.

                                                        *
      A week later, I was watching the news when I heard of the death of a girl. The girl with scarlet begonias and a wish for insanity.

Im alone and afraid
Im angry, im selfish, im sad,
So many things all convulging together
But most of all,
Im in love. Im in love with someone who doesnt exist. Someone ill never find as though im incapable.
why cant i find them? Im here but im not!
When i realize this everything goes dark as i stand in the light.
Who am i?
Why wont i be remebered...
God answered with no voice
And i spoke with long forgotten words
I am Nobody
And Mr Nobody does not exist