you can promise me forever.
you can promise me every past star in the night sky,
every flower that the earth grows unapologetically,
every hour of sleep i always let slip away from me,
and i would still never believe you.

for some reason,
every word has lost its original meaning.
you tell me you love me,
but i can't even begin to grasp what you mean
when you say a four letter word that is the simpliest word to read.

i wish i could feel loved.
whatever that means.
and i wish i knew the original meaning.
whatever that means.

I find beauty in the most simpliest way
By the way people dress and manage things
If only people find beauty in everything
Surely, life would be more simple

Life is not as complex as you think
Right now humans are the ones who make things complex
Everyone wants their theories of life to be heard
But no one wants to do the research

Oh humans, when will you ever change

I will put into a language you can understand
so my point can finally get across
without your constant misconceptions and
twisting of my words.
Your ability is quite a rare talent
found only in a breed of superhumans -
otherwise known as math people.
They are the scientifically analytical and straightforward types
who use their wit and logical minds
to confuse the common folk with
unknown number sequences and expressions.
So that brings us to our problem at hand
how you can turn A plus B into C minus D.
The equation is simple enough,
because the variables are all there.
But the second I open my mouth,
they disappear, flying out of the window
to a land where math is native tongue.
There X times Y is two Pi squared.
Or negative B is positive C.
To put it in the simpliest terms:
Take the constant IAM all over
The product of one S and one O, times
the quantity of R squared, mulitiplied
by the term Y.
Strictly mathematically speaking of course.

I've almost forgotten
what it is to be alive
while the memories
of broken sleep linger
while nothing else remains

I wear the same boots
that walked in enemy terrority
no emotions remain
left to make me feel
what it means to be alive

The broken bodies of children
haunt my mind every now and then
when I think of my return
to a land that holds death
that holds the unknown

Even my finger upon the trigger
can't even stir a response
like the crackle of a radio
breaking the silence of night
screaming "MEDEVAC, MEDEVAC, MEDEVAC"

While I've listened to the lectures
even read the studies
but they can't see
the burning wreckage
the bloodstained floors

Some have said its survivor's guilt
some have even said its my hero complex
but where are the answers
for even the simpliest questions
Why? Why me?

Why must I be haunted
when will I be free
to escape the memories
stirred by the media
to grab ratings

Every death, another shot
another reminder for me
of the friends I've lost
of the missions I've pulled
as the golden hour slips away

but as I stand here
just a shell, vacant and empty
of who I used to be
while the memories linger
its those feelings that elude me

Where this time go?
Where the simpliest things used to make us happy
Where there were no quarrels, and no bleakness in our hearts
Where everything was seen under a colorful filter,
This time of innoncence, where imagination was at its highest
Would we be able to take some of it back?, we all need a little bit of colors in our hearts,
This precious time called childhood, when it was okay to make mistakes
Where someone was looking upon your shoulders for you,
Over the years the colors of this filter have faded away

Gray seems to be prevaiding it,
It’s a sad reality when you realize that your happiness depends on somebody else,
that person has the power to bring new amazing colors into your life, but can easily take them back,
It’s time that we reconcile with ourselves, and find this happiness that once filled our lives
Would we be able to do that?
As a sign the clouds are slowly moving away, and the warthm is gently comforting our bodies,
Embrace it, the best is yet to come.