Back at Donnie's place
this chick had shown me her ****.
Her brother was some guy we ran with.
She had just gotten her ******* pierced
and wanted to know what I thought.
She was a thick girl
with blonde hair
and big chubby ****.
Later
we were at a bar
one of our friends was the DJ
and another was the doorman
so all of us 18 year-old scumbags
were able to drink without too much hassle.
The night started the same way it always did
the first song of the night was always the same
'Symphony of Destruction' by Megadeth
our whole crew sitting in the corner booths
out of the light & in the dark.
We were the dimmer of lights
The party crashers
The woman stealers
The Black Circle.
We downed shot after shot
of this green **** they had
called 'Zombie'.
Drunk off my ***
feeling warm & fuzzy
I went outside for a smoke.
Matt W. ***** lay next to me on the concrete patio
in the back alley of the bar.
I had barely lit the cigarette
when the thick girl with
the big pierced ******* came out back.
We made ******* conversation
for about a minute
before I asked to see her **** again.
She carefully pulled them out
wincing at how sore they still were.
We started making out
and she asked me if I wanted to go somewhere.
I motioned towards the darkened alley behind us.
Matt lay on the ground
Laughing to himself and staring at the night sky
Taking long drags from his cigarette.
In the dark behind some cardboard boxes
And empty liquor crates
She kissed me hard and messy
Both of us reeking of ***** and cigarettes
That stinky combination.
“Why don’t you let those get some air?”
I asked, pointing at her massive mammaries.
“Okay, but…be gentle okay? They’re still really sore.”
“You got it darlin’.”
And out they came, hanging like gods in the sky
I was down on my knees
With my head under her skirt
Just going to town on this thick chick
Like I hadn’t eaten for weeks.
Her hands gripping my greasy hair
And pulling hard
As I got faster and faster
Licking and ******* like my life depended on it
Reaching up and squeezing those *******
As gently as I possibly could.
And then she tensed up
Her knees shaking, trembling, and finally
Buckling as she came
Still holding me by the hair
She pulled me back and out from under that little red skirt.
“Oh my god. Just give me a second.”
She asked, trying to catch her breath
And stop her legs from shaking.
I stood up and gave her a ***** flavored kiss.
“Well?” I asked.
“I’ll go down on you…..if that’s what you want…”
“Of course.”
And she got down on her knees
In that dark alley.
“Ouch.” She squeeled.
“What is it?”
“The ground’s got a bunch of rocks or some ****. ****.”
“Here…” I grabbed one of the cardboard boxes
broke it down in a matter of seconds
and laid it on the ground
at my feet.
“There ya go.”
Before she put it in her mouth
She laughed.
“You’re such a gentleman.”
“I have my moments.”
Afterwards
I walked back over to Matt on the patio
Buckling up my pants.
The lady thanked me
Said it was nice meeting me
And walked back inside to her brother and friends.
Donnie was now sitting with Matt on the curb.
“Where the **** did you go?”
I just started laughing.
It took him a second, but Donnie figured it out.
“Did you just **** that fat chick?”
“No man. I just got a *******. That’s all.”
“What the **** Danny? What are you a male ******* or something?”
I just kept laughing
“Hey ******* man. Nobody gives a ******* like a fat chick.”
Matt rolled over and spoke up,
“The man has a point Donnie.”

Don't remember where I was
I realized life was a game
The more seriously I took things
The harder the rules became
I had no idea what it cost
My life had passed before my eyes
I found out how little I'd accomplished
All my plans denied

So as you read this
Know my friends
I couldn't stay with you all
Smile when you think of me
My body 's gone that's all

Of course I'm okay.
Fine actually,
I love metal music

What ****** me off
is the notion that because the musics loud
and the lyrics are different
something must be wrong

Metal music is a family.
its riff laden roots are dug deep into the roots of my family tree
when I crossed that muddy bank I brought all of me I could.
Except,
I forgot my family.

I couldn't bring them through the mud.
I couldn't bring them desert mountain air

So when I miss them just a little too much,
You can bet I'm gonna put on
Slayer or Megadeth
to drown out the pain of an empty house

That heavy emotion
resonates deep in my chest and it fills my lungs
drowning out the words I cannot say.

Words like I love you,
Words like I wish you were here
Words like I miss you.

send the yeah mate yeah kids to bed, 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4


you see i am a man with a smoke and i am angry

and i am sending the yeah mate yeah kids to bed

they have to clean their teeth and have a shower and shave

and then hop into bed like two non heavy metal likers that they are

you see i am a hooligan sitting on my chair ya know rocking and smoking away

i am liked by all except my family

so i ,are them two scared to sit with me

and it ****** well worked, and now i can

watch my megadeth concerts and watch my youtube and watch my late screening of prisoner

watch women stripping off to their bare essentials, yeah i am cool

i can go out with my mates and throw beer cans on school rooves

and i am getting itchy toes, but it doesn’t matter because

i am sending you yeah mate yeah kids to your little beds

i yell you run it’s the only way to be, you see you f..n wet me with the hose

when i was being an adult you flaming see

i am not going to harm any kid, that is not what i am doing

i don’t like old army men saying, they know better

so i put my megadeth t shirt on and i will f..n scare you

because music is way better to reform

so, you old timer, get off ya chair and move around, and i want to see your old man, no more

woosey woosey woosey woosey

i am a big punkman, to play cool for yeah mate yeah kids, oh yeah

"Megadeth is my favorite band" she said.
Megadeth is absolute trash but I appreciated the fact she even liked metal.
She sat outside with me and we smoked the American spirits she made me buy and we talked about her recent overdose.
"Yeah I was gone then woke up like a from a deep sleep. Scares me to think that nothing might happen when you die"
She was shivering since it was cold outside and my 2xl hoodie looked ridiculous on her yet so cute and endearing. I pulled her in for a kiss, and tasted strawberry from her lip gloss. Her black raven hair unfurled in my lap, and I embraced her in the dim stairwell. I then guided her back to the room while holding her hand, and we proceded to take our clothes off. She had numerous scars on her hip, years and years of self harm. I showed her my own arm and she laughed.
"That's ***** ****" she said
I grabbed a pocket knife and made her cut me.
"What the **** are you doing you ******? Oh my gaahd"
"You called me a *****, so I had to prove myself" I said while laughing maniacally.
I then pooled the blood on my finger and licked it and she skulked over and ****** it too.
"Sorry for making you do a boo boo" she said with a cheeky grin.
"No problem babe"
I then began kissing her neck while cradling her head in my hand and felt her heavy exhales as I made my way down to her *******. I suckled on her ******* and saw her eyes rolling back and goosepumps form on her chest. After some moments I picked her up and threw her down on the bed like a playful brute and started kissing her thighs. Her hands grasped my hair and when I finally reached her **** she was practically tugging my hair from my scalp.
"Ohhhhh right there. Soo good" she bellowed out.
I kept massaging her **** with my tongue until I finally just began ******* it, and inserted a finger and stroking inside her.
She was really moaning now, and I continued until her whole body was trembling, and her knees practically choking me.
Then I eased on her and she fell back panting, and I cuddled with her for a moment, stroking her hair, and cupping her breast in my hand.
SpongeBob was on and we both found that silly.
After a few moments, she slid down the bed and put my **** in her mouth and I closed my eyes and told it her it was good.
Just relaxing. She ****** on my ***** a bit too and she reminded me of a chipmunk with her full cheeks. I giggled. After about a minute, I propped a pillow under her belly and put my full weight on top of her (6'3, 210ibs) and entered in her. She was so tight and every ****** made me want to erupt.
"YAASS DADDYYY! YASSSS DADDY **** ME DADDY!!" She shouted.
I pressed her face into the pillow
"Shut up" I laughed.
I heard her muffled moaning through the pillow, and with every ****** her voice would vibrate in an amusing fashion.
I was about to *** and really pressed in against her with her head tight in my arms like a chokehold.
"ooh I'm gonna *** babe" I whispered
"Yes please. Yes" she responded.
After a few more deep thrusts, I got up to my knees and pressed her mouth to my **** and exploded in her mouth. Every pulse of my **** released another torrent of ***. She looked surprised
"Swallow it babe"
She hesitated for a second then swallowed.
" I don't usually swallow, but I guess I already ****** your blood haha"
After that, I kissed her and we watched SpongeBob some more.
We laughed hysterically at the 'CHOCOLATTTTEEE!!!!!!!' guy.
After about an hour I bought her some taco Bell and dropped her off. We kissed, and she walked into her mom's apartment.
She's since OD'd off of opiates, and I remember the nothing she spoke of often when I sleep, like you weren't even there.
Like a phantom with no residence. and I've since tried listening to megadeth but it still *****. I do like peace sells though babe xoxo and I hope nothing is at least blissful wherever it is

.surprisingly, poached cauliflower tastes so **** good in between pouring drinks... with a little bit of dill... well when you're drinking, and haven't eaten anything prior, other than about six cinnamon biscuits, makes sense to make an interlude with vegetables to fill you up, rather than settling on a meat, or a carbohydrate... the seagull effect... filled stomach, with a low calorie count, before ms. amber fits the spot.

eureka! i found it, the old jukebox
that was once the youtube of
the 00s...
              and early 1-zeros...
**** right i'm proud,
   i had to fiddle the algorithm
a bit, but i managed to return
to early jukebox formality...
all it took was listening to a few
pop songs and other familiar
cross-genre songs...

it began with
uncle acid & the deadbeats'
song dead eyes of London...
the whole trick is in how far
the suggestions extend...
       obviously the first suggestions
look like this:

         now that we're dead - metallica,
  U2 - hold me, thrill me, kiss me, **** me
joan jett & the blackhearts - i hate myself
                                                  for loving you
lady gaga - alejandro
                 bon jovi - blaze of glory
   the prodigy - one man army
                     roxette - she got the look
megadeth - symphony of destruction
   the jimi hendrix experience -
            all along the watchtower...
a jordan peterson video... what the ****?!
ke$ha - die young
   **** - blue monday....
etc.
  
but then you scroll down,
and find what youtube used to look like
as the prime jukebox...
bands like:
w.a.s.p. (wild child)
   ****** jesus (i am the mountain)
spiderbait (black betty)
   pat benatar (love is a batterfield)
    jace everett (bad things)
    king dude (pagan eyes over german skies)
ghoultown (drink with the living dead)
all them witches (the marriage of coyote women)
halestorm (do not disturb)
the pretty reckless (take me down)
with (seer)
                  death (you're a prisoner)
1000mods (electric carve)
red fang (wire)
        lucifer (izrael)
   beastmaker (evil one)
   boys noize (1010)
   church of the cosmic skull (evil  in
your eyes)
     sleep (giza butler)
   the flying hat band (lost time)
kadavar (die baby die)
    valley of the sun (the sayings of the seers)
hexvessel (teeth of the mountain)
   hallas (astral seer)
  jess and the ancient ones (S/T, full album)
high on fire (electric messiah, full album)
elephant tree (elephant tree, full album)
    acid mothers temple & the cosmic...
                      (take me to the universe)
acid king (middle of nowhere, center of
                   everywhere, full album)
radio moscow (magical dirt, full album)
    borracho (atacama, full album)
               fu manchu (daredevil, full album)
somali yacht club (the sun, full album)
elder (reflections of a floating world, full album)

i think that's a decent diet...
well... not that i've listened to any of these,
yet...
but given how the jukebox is
behaving, i thought i'd write out all the new
suggestions and return to them
in the search...
                          OM i already know...
but ****...
    it took me so long to penetrate
this new ****** algorithm to find
the old thesaurus selection search result...
i mean... this new algorithm
has no notion of the synonym...
all it fires is...
   a miser variation of...
     it's not exactly antonym either.

i hope this selections helps you
                in penetrating this new algorithm
to find new music...
      it's wide enough...
apart from OM... all these bands are:
i was born yesterday new.

and i'm supposed to care...
because of...
       what?!

  the Chinks are taking over?
they're already all over...

why should i care?
am i investing in gene
propagation or something?

genes are like a fetus to me:
dead, until in my arms
and outside a woman's body...

nothing much in between...
well... a dichotomy
of argumentation...
and headbanging to
a megadeth song...

and the thought,
that some day,
my neighbor will cross
the line of private property,
and i''ll get to gut
him like...
what ends up pork trimmings...

thought: the last ******* theater,
given the potential...

why should i give a ****?
it's not like people gave a ****
about me to begin with...
        ****, i'm here for the bourbon...
am i jealous?
no... no... not really....
i should be, shouldn't i?
good luck.

no no... i'd love atheism...
if it wasn't for the coupling of
atheism with materialism,
why do atheists bang about this
gene argument?
  why are atheists primarily
materialistic thinkers?
never managed to figure that one
out...
  
all these atheists bang about are
materialistic arguments...
as long as there is no god,
or no soul...
    GENES... GENES 24/7...
      nothing else...
fear of death,
subservient to a gamble on
eternity with the passing on of
genes (according to Hitch-Itchy-Tongue)...

**** me...
      you want to know what scares me
that's outside the emphasis on
death?
old age...
death i can take:
please! the sooner the better!
old age scares me...
because it's not the sort of old
age that guaranteed the
antonymous youth
of ancient Greece, or Rome...

no...
when my parent's die...
i'm not waiting... **** it...
       can't be bothered...
that's why i'm waiting for my
grandparents to die,
so i can ingest the reactionary cycle...
i'm not waiting,
3 hours of pain is 3 years
of a disguised pain of "waiting"...
oh no no no...
   i'm not waiting for the *******
argument...
they're out... i'm out...
      
if only the atheistic arguments
didn't, needlessly, lead toward
a materialistic clinging...
    too much fake realism concentrated
on passing on the genes,
like... fingerprints or ****?
    
once again: good luck!
   you're not passing anything
unless you're not passing
a vagueness of a genesis for
an impersonal impetus -

the coordinates remain the same,
but the vector impetus changes...
genes are, well...
static.

          hence the atheistic argument
for ensuring they continue,
like some Hindu reincarnation tactic,
"levitating": unchanged...
           i'm correct on that one,
yes?
   genes are supposed to remain
static, yes?
   well then!
      atheists are *******
materialists...
        
last time i checked...
    i didn't know that air could be categorized
in the same way as a rock...
that... quasi-ancient
quaternary of the subject-object /
  object-subject "dichotomy"...
                
lying to behold, the prior to unseen
fascinations that might succumb
to the materialistic grip, of
so called reality...

                and if gravity is what
binds all the orbs into a glued motion...

what force, actually instigated
the motion, or...
             kept it perpetuated?

sure... you have the glue question
answered...
but what is the perpetuated motion
question?

no? really?
  no?! really?!
  oh....           let me guess:
you don't!

i'm not kneeling,
and i'm not gesticulating with a prayer
in mind...
                 but god occupies
the entirety of my thinking...
   i can't think without the concept,
which, needless to say...
is so much more,
than the fabrication of
19th / 20th century
psychology of allowing the ego
to replace god...

sorry,
but sometimes the most irrational feeling
can overpower the most rational thought...
why?
   feelings are rarely allowed,
allowed to be caged,
or allow, * being*, caged...
         and my "belief" in a god aligns
itself with Heidegger...
     more to the point:
            man, made justice blind...
   man has no bearing in executing
   the most sacred sense of
                traversing both space, and time...
as mutually exclusive,
rather than the physics of their
mutual inclusion of the space-time
"continuum"...
          i believe in a god,
because, i do not believe that man:
has the sense of law,
to either pass judgement, or justice -
as the Satanic law encrusted:
   within the confines of your
gullible innocence...
        you will make a quadratic equation
of the whole escapade -
your goodness will be the justice,
while your evilness will be the judgement,
or vice versus,
or versus,
   or versus vice...
  or either, or none, or maybe...
    maybe the other way round,
from the other way round... or... quiet simply...
whatever.