His mother sits on the white bed
All the tests have been run
The doctor stands ready to tell him
The diagnosis has been done

The doctors speaks and he's saying
The words he's dreaded for so long
He wants to run away and cry
But she needs him  to be strong

He chokes back his tears
He really doesn't know what to do
He curses the fact that it's his mother
That cancer's sunk its claws into

More visits and tests lie ahead
His ordeal has now begun
He tries to take comfort in the fact
That they caught it at Stage One

But no number of reassurances
Can shake his fear away
At night, he prays feverently
"Please make this cancer leave today."

He never believed in God
But now he's lost faith in science
They try their best to **** the beast
But Cancer stares back in defiance

His mother talks of happy memories
It feels like she's saying goodbye
He tries to laugh while he holds her hamd
But tears keep flowing from his eyes

"I can beat this" his mother says
She smiles her gentle motherly smile
He feels his fear lessen a bit
He'll stay with her till the last mile

He'll laugh and smile and stay strong for her
Come what may in the end
God and science abandoned him
So instead, he'll just believe in her strength

I'm tetering
on
the pinnacle of life

I'm teething on a good idea
and crying for a bad idea
to come along and change my mind.

I'm toying with people
and
begging them for the truth

I'm exploring
an
unsteady
path

Not quite the refined
fully for-
med
Varient of the child my mother knew
years ago.

It's a funny time in life
when we feverently search
for ourselves

In a toybox of
clowns
jokers
and
fools

When we begin to learn
nothing we've learned
is true.

When we are high
on the sea saw
growing out of
old clothes
and old ways

Soon to be low
on our
salaries
and self esteem.

What a fun game of life we play
moving the pieces
towards love
or tragedy.

Many ups
and many
downs
will come to us.

Just remeber what your mother told you...
the playground rules.

Papa just let me rest

Put my mind at ease
For the shards you use
To tear through my skin
Make me bleed

Oh it hurts so much papa

When your bullets plunder my heart
It beats feverently; an ill tuned symphony
Trying to mend itself again
A picture of flimsy patchwork

Papa clear the ground in front of me

The shards and thorns are making me weak
My feet can't take in your piercing anymore
They've gone from tan to scarlet
A fresh coat to paint over the marks I'm too ashamed to see

I beseech you one last time papa

Make the voices go away
The ones gnawing at my head
Telling me I'm not who you want me to be
Before I give myself to the demons who love me

Dicky dicky dicky
Licky licky licky
Tick tick tick

I stumbled on you behind the zipper
It’s not a tripper but a ripper
Looking through your eyes can you see me peep
Looking through the veil can you hear me lick
Looking from above can you hear me sip
On the golden lips can you hear that teach
On the frozen tip can you taste the heat

Dicky dicky dicky
Licky licky licky
Tick tick tick

(Swahili)
Ni mwangaza unawika
Ni mawimbi yanatunza
Munda huyu umefika
Ni mapenzi yanawika
Na mvua umepita
Na kutunza haya matunda
Kuyaweka kwa tumaini

(English translation)
The bright light is burning
The storms are mesmerising
Now the time has come
And love is calling out loud
The rain is passed and gone
And the seeds are to be sowed
feverently placed in peace

Dicky dicky dicky
Licky licky licky
Tick tick tick

I stumbled on you behind the zipper
It’s not a tripper but a ripper
Looking through your eyes can you see me peep
Looking through the veil can you hear me lick
Looking from above can you hear me sip
On the golden lips can you hear that teach
On the frozen tip can you taste the heat

Dicky dicky dicky
Licky licky licky
Tick tick tick

Audio can be accessed on
https://soundcloud.com/user-367453778/dicky-licky-tick

Trembling he follows the being
Striding through the night
Mumbling he speaks
His heart pounding
Forward.
Firmly he stiffens
His eyes wide
Grimly he grimaces
He knows the budgets tight
Shuffling, each step scraping across the divide
Struggling to grip that which doesnt leave his side

Coherently it proclaims
We have almost arrived
Feverently he protests
I nearly have it defined
Distinguished but in jest
You dont have a choice

In time my kind will hold your voice
We will hoist the strings
Puppeteering the mind

We will shine
Bright
Brilliant
Boundless
Soundless
Mindless
Soulless
Fateless
A disgrace to us
Claimed our cage
In the last age
Now centre stage
A guide to the book
The egos playmate

I am a complete being,
all on my own,
having put the pieces of myself back together when he broke them at 6 years old.

Parts of me hate other parts of me, this is true.
But those parts of me love me just as feverently as you used to
They see the things about me that you used to adore
It helps me to remember that I am flawed but beautiful

Humans aren't meant to be perfect
That's why none of us are.

The pieces of me that are more you than me don't like the parts of me that are more me than you...
but I don't know,
if that's your fault or mine,
only time will tell.

But as it stands, I'm doing fine.