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Mateuš Conrad Dec 2024
i mean: how would you feel? living in a society... with these other people, being hell-bent on ensuring you are to be... made extinct? would you captilute for "western"... "secular"... "sensibilities"... what sort of ****-erosion of an argument is this... this Chamberlain's effort to wave a promise on a piece of: ******* toilet paper... wipe your *** with it... ****** implored... but no... no no... it has to be celebrated... this lost event in the periodicals of time... so imagine living among these ****** riddled half-breed Muzzies... imagine living among people that are parasitical in the economic sense and predatory in the actual sense of wanting to **** you... hagel dauer! it just takes one Norwegian-Nigerian to laugh in the night to think my writing is bogus... but there will come a time when this writing with be remnant of the times: and i... i? i'll be dead.

no, i wouldn't call it a bad reading habit:
the fact that i'm "currently" engaged in about 3 to 4 books
that i started and haven't finished,
not when i give a timeline outline of how far apart
i am in getting through each book or,
for that matter: when i started each...

for example Knausgaard's Min Kamp vol 6
i've been reading for almost 3 years...
maybe longer...
the entire collection was the last books my grandfather
gave me as a present:
he died by the time i reached vol 3... or 4...
i remember my first encounter with the work:
"impossible", or rather: dull to have read the works
in English: so i said to myself:
i'll give it another try in another zunge: namely ******
and how glad i was since Norwegian translated
better into ****** than English...
some historical travesty of the Polish state being
allied to the northmen via trade
and the amber road or something: or how English
was partially moulded by the nordzunge...
either way... i'm still to get to the juicy bits
of vol 6 where ****** is discussed and i too wanted
to buy a copy of ******'s mein kampf for
posterity but that's: ******* unavailable as a historical
artifact but i'm pretty sure that if Genghis Khan
wrote a book it would be freely available
and perhaps even venerated
because i, am... some ******* secular "prisoner"
while Muhammad's Quran is venerated:
although i suspect, with him being illiterate
which is twice-dyslexic removed from a first cousin
****** marriage... was written by his literate and
other acumen pronunced first older wife: Khadijah...
notably: he didn't have so many followers
petulent and shy and half the mad of Beelzebub's
(mucha: fly... in Polish)...            conquest of the desert...

why O whimsical sly whiskers and Why
would i care for slander
given the prancing pony parade of disgust after
the Magdeburg attack
like the media imposed this reading of 'terrorist attack'
somehow hailing the culprit
as a savior, in a weird, twisted way:
because he was a firebrand on some internet
forum hailing the death of Europe and calling it
to do more to emancipate Arabian women
from all that dough cash flow from the secret
pseudo harems of Ha Ha H'arabia
because all the European chicks like a bit of kink
when rich gluttons of the sand
ask them to perform inverted ****** on their
faces while taking a **** into their mouths:
or so the urban mythos goes:
no need for a trip to Thailand and the Kentucky
fried mouse...

                     so that's book one... i'm yet to finish...
another is Heidegger's ponderings VII - XI...
but that doesn't really count: no book of aphorisms
and nota bene "apostrophes": anecdotes blah blah counts
as something you might read unlike a newspaper:
skimming, tossing pages around like a wind...

    which also includes Masudi's the meadows of gold...
there is no real narrative to the work so i can "cheat"
on that reading...
        yet starting Jan Fosse's septology was a big mistake:
thinking: ooh: a Nobel Literary Prize laureate could:
but couldn't... the prize was awarded
a bit like how H'american elections go...
the popular vote of the people is worth zilch and nada
because there's the College vote and that matters more
so it's almost as if democracy is a fakery
of arithmetic: bad count... bad grounds for shadow
governance...         and this was worth a Nobel prize?
i think is dropped so many times
there is no punctuation
     it's like the advent of the printing press whereby
ink and paper were expensive and there could be no
poetic cascade
   just the myopic paragraph fudge and inorganic chemistry
of stones...
saving money and ink and paper condensing
paragraphs without spacing indicators
beside the 💊𓄿
                              (¶) - which borders on cyrillic in
the mirror with N and И
R and Я
                                     so someone once said
that most of the time, in the realm of poetic:
we write about what we're reading...
                       but not so much about the simple fact
of the per se: writing per se: reading per se...
it's a simple fraction...
    i always adored the equilibrium of:
            not writing more than i read
and always reading more than i write...

           if all should come to a fork in the road
i could condense my thoughts via letters encoding sounds
by isolating letters as if they were not sounds
syllables... ooh... syllables and languages that employ
the antithesis of the atomised tongue
like Japanese and it took me a while to imagine
having my tongue cut out and thus trying to say
certain letters as if i didn't have a tongue
and i could get away with using only my mouth
and lips but i couldn't get away with some of the letters
because they do, actually, require a tongue an the palette
of the upper mouth...
like T...                    counting all the vowels:
5 in English... 7 in Polish...
funny: Polish as a tongue: it has as many letters
as there are teeth in the gob...
unlike English with it's 26 although the 26 are debetable
since C K Q S and q: kw
                              
lips and mouth alone along the aeiou pentragram rubric...
B works fine withot the tongue
C just as well... although hoarse sounding...
D... doesn't... it morphs into G...
since D employes the tongue and the teeth...
so without tongue D morphs into G and the 5 vowels...
vowels don't use the tongue
just the mouth and throat and air...
F requires the tongue...
H doesn't require the tongue...
                 J requires the tongue for the succinct stresses...
K is the crown of the uvula being tested...
    L most certainly requires the tongue...
       K is tricky: but hark like a crow and the tongue
can be abandoned...
          M as: ma ma
  m'eh m'eh... moo...          as long: well put Am Om
and it's a breath closing the lips...
        N does require the tongue...
Q and coo... but since Q is a two vowel letter
it does require the tongue...
T, S, Z... all require the tongue...
   W doesn't...
                  R before the numbing the trill by some vague
"tarantula" bite... did... didn't... let's suppose
the French and the English still trill their Rs like the Spanish...
                 and any other letter i omitted: X?
evidently the tongue is stressor to otherwise
the breath and the lips doing fish Bob's service plunder...

but it feels healthy like that:
a newspaper handy: my my... so the savior of Europe
is some Saudi psychiatrist
Germany is on the poking stick of resurrected Weimar Rep
fuckery
        because now the story goes:
it's no longer a right wing mental health case doing
some scooping for info
like watching ****** speaches on South Korean t.v.
and how sane he almost sounds
when he's not in full glam demonic rhetoric mode...
and to think:
at the time of the Polish-Lithuanian commonwealth
we were a people known for religious tolerance...
we even managed to found the first Protestant nation:

the devout Catholic king Sigismund I the Old (1506–48)
accepted as his vassal in Ducal Prussia,
the Lutheran prince Albert I, Duke of Prussia,
thus creating the first Protestant country in the World...

oh and with the largest diaspora of the world's Jews...
but then we were taught lessons
for our tolerance...
first the partitions... then the onslaught of the Nazis
coupled with the Soviets...
we were taught a different toleration:
the toleration of: you will not live among us...

it took a month for Poland to be conquered
during world war two... no mention of Russian involvement...
but it took six weeks for Germany to conquer
France... France... a colonial superpower...
versus this newly emerged pauper state
that sent men on horseback to throck grenades against
******* tanks...            irony: history is so ironic...
it's not even on repeat: but how humans interact with time:

if Einstein conjured the space-time dynamic
then i had to delve into a humanism
of a science and call space: architecture...
that the ancient Romans once occupied
the capuccino lands of Plaza Pizza...
with their coliseums and football stadium reinventions...
and time being history: well hey presto!

Horace: quo me, Bacche, rapis tui plenum?
where are you scooping me up with force?

in times of crisis: it is best to leave follies aside
follies of literature / narrative... proper...
so i picked up a Polish translation of Aristotle...
Great Ethic and Poetics...
i never thought i'd come to Aristotle having begun my
journey with Plato...
but hey presto... miracles happen...
and what stood out: immediately...
a correlation between Heidegger and Aristotle...
question-worthiness becomes an answer of worthiness-per-se...

what begun as an arithmetic of counting
the camel's humps...
like they might be dunes of the Arabian desert
or the raised Alps...
i wonder...
date an older woman: with child...
send the child a parediloia riddle
then get accussed of sending a ******* picture...
and there i was... about to sacrifice
my earnings and tickle of a few more years
on walking on eggshells...
i can be accussed of ****** and of thievary...
but... i can't be accussed of ******* or of ****...
sorry... that's where my love grows numb...
i can no longer love
i am numb with logic and reason...
i will turn to Aristotle concerning the
man of worth and the egoist...
because the man of worth will only be egoistic
concerning moral beauty...
because morality is a beauty unlike anything
stressed by aesthetic...
morality is a trans- (translation) of the arts...
morality undermines art:
or so it should:
call me a murderer or a thief:
but don't call me a ****** charlatan of deviance!
don't jest with asexual reproductive tactics
then start calling it: intact egoism!
egoism is born from both sexes
given that the ego is sexless!
but insinuate that i am more a ******* than a murderer
and you will feed my: wrath...

samolub: egoist...
   man of worth...            who feeds off the privy of power
and wealth... philosophers as surrogate fathers and mothers
to their eldest children...
no... i don't need a psychiatrist to prescribe me
blue pills, black pills, red pills...
i just need a philosophy book and some time
alone and knowing that the time i spent
i was bothered about high brow literature like
a Nobel prize matters when it's not dynamite...

now comes the wrath in writing
because my heart has grown numb from the accusation:
it must be a H'american thing...
i asked AI the dynamic of getting a greed card visa:
sexed up...
works fine if you are an American gent
importing a Thai queen progress...
but reverse that...
i can't imagine sitting on my *** for half a year
until i might get a permit to work...

then again: let's be honest:
beside the fact that i told her:
there is no better brothel... there are no better prostitutes
than in the church of the Savior...
but to be accussed of sending a teenage girl
a picture of my *******?
come on...               there's paranoia and there's
absurdity...
   so philosophy books exist to cling to like
a drowning man might cling to a razor blade...
i don't need a psychiatrist to talk **** over
and to be presribed anti-metabolic pills to fatten
me up...
     plus all the red flags... all her previous boyfriends
were the problem: she wasn't...
if i get accussed of said X...
who is to say i won't be accussed of unsaid Y?

σπoυδαιoς (human of worth)
               is not an egoist (φιλαυτoς)....

                 spoudaios... philautos...

            that's settled: the "ego" in my stomach
overruled the "ego" in my mind and most
importantly the *******-ego of everywhere
that's alias to my body-extremity...

                    i needed the bait... i found the bait...
then i needed the opposite party to trip up
and take the bait...
which would absolve me from feeling guilty
of leaving my elderly parents to fend for themselves:
with only the promise of the greatest *** imaginable
i could hone in on a diet of
just pure wanking
and be content with that...
because the idea of slobbering on a ****
that would be only recreational rather than give privy
to my fatherhood...
well... should you find yourself in a similar situation
with an older woman:
how modern this all is...
fancy how far feminism has come
to ensure that age is only a number
so the medieval times are like the 1960s
in terms of attitutdes toward affairs of the heart
and there was never a period in time
when heretical mouths were not given the slither
of the stiches to shut them up...

i can be accussed of being a murderer...
a thief...
but a pedohpile or a ******?
         you don't get away with that sort of accussation:
i am numbed out of loving her
we invested so much time in discussing
paraidolia that it stunned me:
stunted me: i became a dwarf and a castrato at the same
time...
            
         i don't have time for that sort of ****...
if being alone is my fate:
at least i'll have philosophy books to mind
and none of that housewife *******
of floral arrangements and seeing young Reyla
being disgruntled at a nativity play for the school
not playing the lead role of Joseph that
cuck...

             i hate Christmas i hated Christ the moment
i heard the mantra of: turn the other cheeck...
when oculus per oculus (eye for an eye)
was seemingly erased from our natural ontology...
i hate "christ" on a personal level...
i love the church for how well it organises people...
i just hate "christ": cosmopolitan this ******* figurine
this slaughter piece standard to conquer the north...
while these ****** ****- go lampooing their desert whims
of wisdom like bogus hocus pocus...

**** these desert ******* these camel jockeys...
i've reached a clarity levelling that's
beyond my concern for whatever humpty-dumpty politco
dynamic is left available:
if my ancestors lived through **** Germany
and Soviet Russia: a people desperately willing
with so few quid... you think these Arabs
with their ******* easy money thrill me to scare me?!
really?!
               i'm waiting for martydom.
kelly jane May 2017
In the heart of the guilt
lies a poison worst than that of a cobra
He stays speechless when accussed
Like a robe tied round his neck
The truth burns down his throat
Like a burning flame down a hole
Causing him an unease feeling
To split out the truth
Thou tries to stick to his lies
But the burning flame burns him harder
Till he let go the truth
The pain cuz by guilt can only leave when the truth is sent out
Avoiding the truth will just hurt the heart more.
But when truth is sent out, then and only then can the heart be at peace
Mateuš Conrad Jan 2020
well, it would really become a problem...
if i were still jerking off and had a girlfriend / wife...
the ladies are looking for ultra-violent ****,
it's just a tease off ***** -
there's choking there's *******:
oddly enough... no yo-yo of Watergate?
me... i'm not willing to be shamed...
i still have my ******* -
she can have her webcam e-thot or whatever
the hell the internet **** is: memes my ***...
once upon a time it was merely called graffiti...
i don't see how darwinism can make
a 2nd coming resurgence in the 21st century...
fine... when it first came out at the end
of the 19th century: and opened the floodgates
for the 20th... and thanks to the physicists...
lasso! rein 'em in! rein 'em in:
for the fireplace and the ******* kumbaya...
the girls are looking and having finally decided
on an spanish omelette: but not a french ****
quiche... eggs and more eggs...
while i'm strapped to ******* one genocide
after another into the tissue and
flushing it down as: meat for the crocodiles
and tapeworms pretending they know how
play the parasite attaching themselves
to a white all white: white even if you're copper
skinned, cinnamon, hot choc or...
it's still a white tadpole racer...
i usually get off on looking at some xenia wood
cleavage...
it helps to tell apart the *** cleavage and
the breast cleavage...
i moved from: ******* snaps and started peering
at: when a woman pretends to perform
the lotus on a man's face...
and there's like... a floral pattern involved
with gulping oysters...
have i ever licked an ***-hole?
oh my... have i...
**** - *** 1-on-1... doom... 1st person shooters...
never the 3rd person ghost moving
the body...
am i missing something? the girls are
looking for extreme ***... i'm looking for
cleavage and teddy bears -
and the borderline before the whole body
exfoliates and what not...
as marquis de sade said: it's hardly something
i can control when i have a hard-on
almost 4 times during the day...
if i had a girlfriend... if would be crass to:
sly one in...
but... *******... no woman no cry...
it would be truly sad if i was in a relationship
and still up to the shambles of: not up to any
or the odd sort of good -
there's always this shared approach -
the wants and willingness needs to by made
synch. - they need to be a woman and a man:
polyphony - orchestra!
why write about ***? oh hell...
watch me write anything else -
my linguistic infatuations - *** and all manner
or picked ******* sells -
or... at a catholic school they would still teach
you about the perils of sniffing glue -
apparently the 1960s never happened -
no l.s.d. was ever dropped -
the pints of guinness were drank -
the cement was poured as the muscle to
the iron rod skeletons...

and when i finally achieved a beard worthy
of a post-25 year old - when the full
bush sr. happens - i forgot to curate
a body for: the objective safety of being watched...
or how the hell you word:
prior to the beard i focused on the face
and later the body...
and long hair...
once the beard arrived...
**** it... let's take to donning the Elijah
look... the beard comes way way ahead
of the nose - and now i'm still looking
for my neck -

it's *** it's only spectacular about once...
i've had that once spectacular -
i even got a tattoo -
oh... not me... i'm the dragon alien curl...
where my scar is...
on her right shoulder-blade...
and that's not even as if i branded her
myself...
she was going to fit me out with
dreadlocks and a tattoo of her totem at
the time - a scorpion -
thankfully i read about all this crap
in high school...
nick hornby's high fidelity -

it's still a very musical affair...
i remember what love at first sight looks
like to a fresh 17 year old
novosibirsk girl... siberian girl...
all the way west in edinburgh...
she gobbled the iPod and the playlist...
a near complete oeuvre of iron maiden...
and the odd songs...
while i was correcting two girls attempting
to make pancakes...
girls! you need to put some oil into the dough...
this is dough you'd make a sponge cake with...
so the story goes...

but *** was only spectacular once...
the rest of the time i think i was minding an itch...
even these days...
among... aha! that nag hammadi word:
in the Barbelo - the brothel -
no: i will not study the etymology -
in the brothel nothing spectacular ever happens -
you chance upon a ***** -
you're asked whether you want to use it -
you decline -
to play judas with the lips -
you pay an extra ten quid for you-feeding-the-oyster
suckling and all other leech comparison of oral...
ventures...
it's done - the mirrors are witnesses...
the lights are dimmed - two beached whales
on the shore of a bed of crisp linen -
and no one-night-stand
cocoon *** *******!
how do people stand these cocoon ***:
under the bed-sheets moments?!

because it would be really harsh to have a girlfriend...
and still have to *******...
at least without a girlfriend i can solve
the mystery of the throne of thrones -
no. 1 no. 2 and no. 3 -
then a quick baptism in the shower -
i sometimes found that doing the no. 3
helps with a constipation
of a no. 2 on: the throne of thrones...

- and as someone who discovered *******
before he could produce ***** -
well - the ******* is a "side project" -

because this world already needs no more
puritanical quips -
all this ******* stigmata looms over
the circumcised men -
but of course it would - why wouldn't it?
can you scratch your nose
if you cut-off the "un-necessary" rubicon /
cartilege?

would a balding scalp Adam ever scratch his
head - quiver - i thought that only stubble
and hair prompted one to scratch one's skin?
if i see a bald man scratching his head:
i'll let you know!

the plague of circumcised men's stigmata -
and if i had a girlfriend and she wasn't
"up to speed" like me: quasi marquis de sade
"might expect"...
**** me... even Chikatilo "fathered" children...
so much for "excuses": 2 to be exact!
nominee for bachelor of the year...
205th year (circa) coming:
Kant - the prussian watchmaker in
a coming of: calculating the promenade of
excuses - no famously i didn't / wouldn't
marry -

if you asked what i used to do
on those warm spring nights...
back in ol' satellite of the former u.s.s.r. -
and that... we entertained ourselves...
catching cockchafer beetle and catching girls
and tugging at their t-shirts and throwing
them in...
we: used to that sort of thing...
what better reason to drink seeing
the youth of today:
as a seemingly old dounding man:
well... in your 30s you sort of hit that zenith
of mortality's vitality on offer -
as much as technology is celebrated -
its change - it's impetus -

what's that... quote?
when an unstoppable force (technology) meets
an immovable object (ontology) -
or at least: i find man's ontology
to be forever played and plagued
by a priori "prepositions": genes -
and technolgoy is forever the a posteriori
counter-fact: of what much later...
much much later... in limbo land of history
becomes an: artifact escaping archeology...
now are we all not wishing
for some variation of closure?

memes: represented as genes?
really? i see them nothing but a cheap south-paw
jab's worth of the otherwise obvious:
graffiti (representation)...

girls are really searching for violent *** -
having **** fantasies?
my my - and here i was looking
for a xenia wood cleavage and some Bronzino:
you never have curbed your pornographic
enthuasiasm: if you never ******
off at...
mein gott! it's a meme!
1st comes god's index finger touching
adam's index finger in:
michelangelo's fresco of the creation of adam...
but the higher 2nd?
venus' tongue teasing the tongue
of cupid in Bronzino's cupid, folly and time...

i ****** off to that painting -
it's hard to stop a boy who knew how to:
prior to the kippah-guilt tripping:
no minus the ******* into early teenagehood...
i don't think i have yet to have dumped
the proper load on this: exercise - just yet...

oh the shame:
thankfuly this is england and no h'america -
and jesus is not the queen or king -
ol' lizzie is still playing poker and...
the constitution is and what i will not become
is this "vox populis" of a people
disaffected as to why the tax goes into the
pomp & circumstance and none of it:
thank god! ever goes into sense & sensibility
akin to the consort Middleton family;
that's highly replica prone...
blue-bloods... love them or hate them...
at least you can sight them as
almost unchanging -
sphynx head while the body changes
from male to female - but the sphynx is still there...

of an erectile-dysfunction: i would most certainly
hear if i had a girlfriend...
as it happened - the "free women"
always gave me a limp...
in the brothel i was there and she was there -
and i was she and she was i
and we weren't bothered about
counting two transgender sheep
of the nag hammadi library -

even on those one-night stands:
erectile-dysfunction - dim lights two beached
whales on the bedsheets i could stomach...
in a brothel...
but then she took me home
like some morrissey wallow and...
it was all about cocoon ***...
i've heard that temperature changes
the *** of frogs upon insemination...
cocoon *** under the bedsheets...
i stopped going out...

it's might almost sound like boasting:
believe me... it's disgruntled sarcastic... the overtone
to these words...
even i tried teasing a fetish with
latex lucy - but... then i thought about...
if you start wearing the same clotches
for god knows how long -
like an imitation of dog's hair...
you'd wish to squish into something
less pardonable / expected like a full gimp
imitation of lizard latex...
but violence an ****?

maybe that's why i started to tease
1970s italian classics...
dubbing from belgium and amsterdam
and all that...
but always after the torso cleavage -
always after the Om-onomatopeia look of
absent eyes and boiling tongues in a gurgle...
the contorted final stages of the face
before the lesser death as:
faking birth in ****** -
or what the hell you call: scavenger of:
never the lost details...
and if i had 7 children in the bag i would be
a fraud... and if i had a girlfriend
i would be a fraud and hopefuly ashamed...

came the white flag... came the rainbow flag...
came the ******* flag...
came the image: how would you ever find
yourself in a desire to blink: to peacock flutter...
without a pair of eye-lids?
hmm...
all those ******* freed arguments...
not coming from the "progressive school"
of islam -
or the hasidic jewry where:
a woman is to made to make concessions?
otherwise: waiting for that
golden moral maxim Confuscian wifey?

that a deity should...
somehow give moral laws...
i thought that man was the moral lawgiver?
if god were to become the moral
law advocate...
man should most certainly become
the physical law-giver - or at least:
to best serve my attention -
attempt fictional escapes via superhero
infantilism...

again: historiological infantilism -
the only serious history we are supposed to know
comes from h'america...
the civil rights movement -
that's serious history!
everything else is infantile historicism -
interchange of historicism and historiology -
yes - heidegger's leftovers...
but what is serious history?
and what is infantile history?
oh i'm pretty sure much of history kept in
agitated dust is: cowboys vs. indians
roleplaying... games...

cite anything serious of the past...
if there's no stampede toward some platonic exit...
then serious history happens with
the h'american civil rights movement...
after that we only have journalism
and bad idea dear diary entries...
of the next to come: ***** teenager
plague by acne and the many more oopses to come...

- and with the world saturated by:
an **** of forms - wielding their interwine and
maggot pit of "metaphors" -
better i write this than speaking during *** -
what could possibly saturate the "land"
that's already a swamp -

somehow i'm not edging toward a moral
superiority - the day i discovered
that god was both the god of writing
physical: and moral laws...
i was assured by the chinese that:
all kosher and all halal would pass
the test of the: 3 peepsqueaks...
no? do not eat a pig: do not eat a mandarin!
god only knows what the pig ate...
god forbid you ever knew the full
menu of Beijing!

pigs are the: das schlechteste!
das äußersteschlechteste!
pigs, mandarins, bats...
the bubonic plague, rats,
"supposing that africans would ever ****
monkeys"...
why would africans ever
**** monkeys...
i'm supposed to be ashamed of
having a hard-on...
while the white girls rummage
the carousel!

i could suppose the chinese already
ate the supposed ****-buddy to begin with...
it's no more funny when the "thing"
spreads like a mongolian shy-auxilliary
brigade of: voyeurs of:
the only evolution we are to be concerned
with, is to be better associated
with viruses, parasites and lice...

and if i were to live a sheltered western
liberal elite life... "elite":
the bigger the mouth the bigger the... whatever...
no complaint from the arabs
itching over well curated pork...
they'll allow the mandarin diet! no problem!

it's no problem...
pigs are the "problem"... when a god devolved
to invoke moral laws: his most high!
and it was "somehow" not man...
how can god, a monotheistic god...
give both physical laws and moral laws?
to me that's near impossible!
ah... unless this god is given
the "plotheistic" splinter of being
a theistic god and not a deistic god...
a theistic god gives both physical
and moral laws... a deistic god gives:
no moral laws: he was expecting
we could do so!

i can't believe in a god that plagiarises
man's activity -
man can't change the laws surrounding gravity...
yet to be known whether light
is somehow subjected to gravity...
but a god does not intervene by giving
moral laws...
having already established physical laws...
entertaining himself in the playground
of metaphysics...
only a prince... the devil -
would ever... intervene as god to give...
higher authority: a plagiarism of
man-made laws...
and call them: with deity origins...
why would a "god" meddle in:
you will not steal, you will not ****...
when...
god has set up a recycling centre?!

god is no judge, prosecutor, lawyer,
defendent, the accussed,
the jury over moral laws...
he is the epitome of physical laws:
the unchanging...
to have confused divine intervention
with a god bowing -
before and succumbing to...
man's ordiance... a moral law...
god does not allow himself moral qualities...
and god would not discriminate
against a pig: saying:
but the pig is the most economic piece -
had not man found the boar and
domesticated it?
the boar became the pig domesticated!
and the pig can be eaten...
from snout to tail and with only
the oink missing!

for a god to be so degraded as
the arbiter of physical laws -
to be ***** into giving moral laws...
only a devil would...
only a devil would...
only a devil would play with man's moral
laws... and attempt to supress
the already constaining impossible
with his cameo in egypt -
that machiavelli of sorts...

if the quran attempts to question
the cleanliness of pigs:
and god made the pig...
or rather made the man and the boar
and allowed man to domesticate the boar...
sick... ugly... but...
kept the mandarin: pristine!
save the pig... eat a mandarin!
if you dare...

how much do i abhor these infernal riddles:
how much i abhor scolding the bacon:
is also as much as:
you deserve the beijing sneeze!
you should let it palm tree vacate
and spread in the united arab emirates!
oh.. go on go on go on!
who's not looking?!

i only have old teutonic anthems to listen
to... because...
i like the way german sounds,
how german sounded...
how german will sound...
because at least german is not english...
and that's almost asking for a plum
tattoo of hue under the teasing
socket and the cheekbone: when in england...

no zeppelin echo you hear?
encore! again! again!
it's not o.k. to eat a pig according
to the hebrews of the muslims...
the mandarins will act worse than pigs
that the classical monotheists speak of...
a cat could catch a mouse...
but a cat could not be served a mouse
on a platter... what's that dish called?
the 3 peepsqueaks?
and pork is bad?
pork is just the tip of the iceberg
concerning these omnivores...
at this point... perhaps cannibalism?

islam go back home: check if there are
any mandarins living among you...
pork is bad... pork is bad!
this is not being paranoid this is me being funny!
pork is bad and your pseudo-god
of man-made moral plagiarisms!
*******: snippet the ******* but sure you
hell and bring me the niqab!
no *******? no niqab...

why are you looking at me?
i'm a tired old european...
why should i know what floats the boat
over in h'america?!

this "god" and the "intervention"...
oh i'm pretty sure we made our moral laws...
they weren't exactly to translate as a morality =
claustrophobia...
"god"...
               a belief that the same god
created the physical laws / barriers...
and somehow... decided to... plagiarise, human,
moral laws...
how this "god" decided to become
architect of physical laws...
and the interpolator of morals?
really?

a god that's critical of pork per se:
******* sheep ******* the semites...
but not critical of the mandarin diet?
that's no god; "at least not to me"...
the god that made gravity critical
as immoveable...
but a secondary god that...
was ignorant... of the fact that...
humans already punished stealing
and ******?!
why require a doubled emphasis?!

it's as if "god" made an entrance -
when no pyramids were to be built...
it's not: oh no...
we were never given any a priori parameters!
we were always supposed to sink into:
the thinking of being free...
let's face it...
at best: bad operatics of
madame butterfly at best:
only a soap opera.
Mateuš Conrad Jan 2017
i don't think i wrote something incoherent... i mean, i could be accussed of having written something incoherent... but the way i look at it, i didn't exactly write a discourse... platonism - theatrical notation of philosophy, theatre as such... became abhorred way-back before platonistic abhorrence of poetry became established in the koranic text... so no... i don't think i wrote something incoherent, i might be guilty of writing it in a berserk-like frenzy... but it's not incoherent... it's simply said in a language, that's says θ = φ, ε = η, o = ω, ξ = χ, so you see... all the aesthetics dwindles... because i wrote this without it being reminiscent of a beautiful conversation under the moon in some exotic place... or a conversation you might have in a supermarket when buying a pint of milk... that's why the above stated greek letters are actually the same... and they exist as "chiral" if you decide to take into consideration aesthetic orthodoxy with origins in making literacy a monopoly... nothing contained in here is incoherent... the only "incoherency" of this piece is that: you wouldn't really talk to someone about it, when buying groceries, or having a nostalgic conversation with a friend... it's ad abstractum... that thing that's also not bound to any parliament or church.

some people really do aspire to be quenched
by the phenomenon status...
   to be the slang first said,
   to be the last, doctrine fed,
          i admire these people, well, admire,
like i'd admire king Solomon -
who prayed to be bewstowed by wisdom,
and what came of his prayer?
              a weak heart, and a walrus status
with a harem...
        i hold my **** like king David holds the lyre...
call it what you want...
              but you see a shagged out beauty like
Dakota Skye, and you just have to bash out
the tennis *****...
                   it comes naturally:
will i get a crown for celibacy, or should i wait
for prostate cancer...
          is there anyone in the vicinity to help me out?
not really...
i can't fanticise about either of my neighbours...
   ****-wits attest to the tried path of protestantism's
freedom-libido...
            but what i'm curious about more perverse
than that... perosnal hygiene isn't really the question
being asked...
                  yes, take a ****, partake in the double-quickie...
it almost feels like ******* and taking a ****
is a *******'s worth of v.i.p. pass when
they say shalom, you ease out the **** and
*******... hence the ******* perfume to boot...
   why do it in the shower?
       why get comfy and do it in an armchair?
   lucky me... i need no *****...
and doubly-lucky me: i read enough marquis de sade...
   oh no, he's not repetitive in his book *******
,
he's lost the ability to lullaby you to sleep
strapped to a chair in a sadist's disneyland by now...
       but hell: i see no need to glorify these assertions,
i'm just gagging for the moment my
peers will find it boring doing what they do,
when they reach middle-age and have forgotten
******* per se, as a driving factor for
imagination, or how one thrives on keeping
imagination alive by jerking off...
            it becomes a story of: not really looking
for my dream girl... just give me anything that moves
and i'll be content...
                 when was the last time you
picked up a bisexual thai girl in a park off a bench,
took her home, played her some jazz, and later
****** her in the garden by the moonlight?
       what finally convinced her?
in her own words: i've never seen so many books...
   well yeah, that's modesty creeping up on me.
    and unless you're not using the medicine:
what?! you gonna start imagining ******* your mother?
    the point is that Kant can never become a
populist philosopher... he made his life so: that
he never encountered the weitgheist of Napoleon
at Juna... Kant wasn't the antithesis of Marxism...
      you can't take Kant to a movie premier in Leicester Sq....
   you can take Kant to the pulpit...
   sure thing, you can take Hegel, as you do,
to get people mobilised...
       that's why i prefer Kant in that he gave me something
to work on... as much as i admire
                  the people subjected to creating phenomenons of
themselves... so that people can be cloned and bleached
and be told the marching orders: these days musicians
are the kings... poets are the paupers...
   i identify with neither...
                       i mean, just the one word he invented,
if you want to ask me about a priori and a posteriori
atypical things people regurgitate about Kant,
i'm not your man...
                      if i can salute to the pig through of everything
and nothing,
                       i'll make a statue from oyster shells instead...
it's enough that i told you what Kant wrote
that 0 = negation...
                               but given what i'm trying to
really say is the people who give us individuality...
it doesn't matter whether you live in a democracy or
an autocracy...
   the matter is simpler, because only one word has
any meaning right now: to congregate at the altar of
the noumenon...
                               res per se... that the latin translation...
   i don't know how best to poeticise the blurry line
between psychiatry and philosophy, given that most
    psychiatrists would put philosophers in bird cages
and asked them to howl like wolves rather than
tweet like budgies...
                            all i can say about a priori
and a posteriori though?
                                              outside of time and space,
a bit like: beyond good and evil...
    a priori i denote by the right-wing word pure...
   and a posteriori by the      ditto           word impure...
    ethnical alliance of words, you know how the 20th century
story goes...
                      a priori: a blank canvas...
          a posteriori: the painting...
                          i'm not going to stutter on the word
knowledge any time soon...
                                        i see no fascination with knowledge,
i know the world is more transit and fleeting
if i sentence my emotional whole to doubt,
than if i sentence it to denial...
                      to a rigidness... that i sentence it to a permanence,
an illusion, of growing old and having all the lovelies
at my biding, in a political cartwheel...
                           either knowledge diminishes doubt,
or it embraces denial... but the wavering of thought can't
be detached from thinking...
                     with thought being ascribed denial rather than
doubt... it soon morphs into delusion...
                 can you really sport that sort of blonde quiff and
speak about red buttons?
    it's not even Friday and i'm sorta waiting for a mob
boxing match in Washington... easy kicks...
     it's Klitschko vs. Tyson on the cards,
   if i'm not feeling it... then all the past electorate weeks
have been a waste... all the protests signifying a jack-in-a-box...
who escaped it as nothing but purple puff...
and rarely, rarely... do you see people asking
for riches in terms of the words they use...
     vocab materialism is a bit like actual materialism...
a gold-plated toilet seat is about as sought-after as a word
    without being systematically used to banish synonyms...
the horrid affair of english intellectualism...
   the presupposed moral authority...
                            i mean, they moralise *******,
you go to a brothel... they strap a pair of dove wings to prostitutes
and call you a ****...
                          and there's you doing the opposite
of what should attract *******...
       i mean: you pay an extra ten quid to ****** mollest her
oyster of a *******...
                   that has to be some sort of Gethsemane *******...
oh please lord: when will it end?! (enter herr cackle,
the self-righteous faun, dressed as a magpie)...
        never knew that a kiss meant so much
when you didn't put 1 with 2 to make it a *******
and asked the devil to debate: what did i wrong here?
ah, that bit... jumped in the bath and soaked myself
in cold water while she remained, bed bound and *******...
    god: those tickling *****!
                    i could do it 20 times a day and i'd still feel
goosebumps all over them...
                     it's like that talk of the ghost-limb
when people get gangrene / frostbite amputations...
    well, that's what i call a case of "castrato" -
             i'm getting the impressions i lost them to
serve the Catholic church... shame the pharaohs of egypt
never asked the eunuchs how to sing...
   real shame that... a right ol' spot of bother...
   they were the harem toys when the pharaoh couldn't keep up,
i say: there's a limit... the ***** count sometimes
doesn't compete with the libido...
after a while it dilutes and you're shooting blanks...
   but you have a harem of 3000 ladies, king Solomon...
how will you keep them harem bound?
   king Solomon also said: i need 300 pristine virgins
to be castrated... that's 3 to 10 ratio... but since i'm the king
i need my lineage...
and remember that crazy cat lady?
                          she kept 30 cats and those 30 cats just said:
the lady's o.k.... all these 29 cuddly ***** are bothering my
beauty sleep! dogs can sniff each other up... cats?
primo solipsists... they need their personal space...
            the "crazy" cat lady wasn't crazy, the 30 cats became
demented... last time i heard tigers weren't responsible for
wilderbeast stampedes...
                 solipsists... well: "solipsists"... bound to the strict
natural dictum of their species...
              don't you think tigers would love to
roam like hyenas or wolves, or laze like lions?
                        i was really talking about Kant through
this Dionysian frenzy, wasn't i?
                     how when not to look toward
imitating a noumenon or forging out a route toward
such a circumstance?
                            even Heidegger move away from
this ultimate pinpoint...
                                Heidegger claimed that his dasein
made very little of a constancy of the Cartesian thing,
meaning that he couldn't stand-still...
         that somehow being was greather than stasis...
which already create
            the Kantian parallel predating Heidegger himself...
   the suffix of dasein (sein) is what's considered thought...
         it's a prophetic circumstance of seeing a there,
necessarily a future time... and hence him being branded
**** eternal... when in fact that can't be the case...
            nonetheless Kant moved away from Descartes
and said: res per se...
                          and not res cogitans...
he did so, as is apparent in his critique by isolating
                       the precursor: "i think" as an ambiguous fact...
  ambiguous in a sense of: providng the encapsulating
  mechanics for what is best attested as the populist vocab
calls it: eccentricity of "i am" - that which attracts
         the reversal of "i think" being an ambiguous fact,
and more of a chance to demand a circus, of not being
quiet adept at making "i think" an amiguous fact...
and beside the circus of the "madman", having qualms
   as to why adrenaline took over the argument for
and purpose of there being thought involved.
        -  oh honey... i'll mind-******* and eat your
refrigerator out, and by the end we'll be singing sweet ol'
Alabama wishing for a single summer by a lake
frolicking like two butterflies... if this **** can ever come to
an end   -
             Kant didn't, in the cursor that's i am, posit as
a necessary ambiguity... (the res and res per se
were already established) -
                   hence Heidegger had to come...
and make thinking the ambiguity... and that ambiguity did
come, in the form of the ad abstracto there;
                         thinking fizzled out (as Heidegger himself
concluded: we're still not thinking) -
            it's not that we're not thinking, it's that not being "there"
      dictates to us the subsequently not being -
         i.e. that's the borderline distinction -
          by actually being "there" we wouldn't be thinking anyway...
no one thought in Auschwitz...
                            there was no thought encompassed in that hell...
it was dogmatism on one side, versus natural intuition on
the other...  the one side being nurtured by political dogma:
the latter half being bound to an unforgiving nature
                  of man's testmanet outside of all fears of the natural,
and elemental torture...
   as man is prone: with the fewer number of natural
tragedies... he's bound to reach for the godhead and speak
with a tongue, like the sound of Xerxes ordering the Hellespont
to be whipped still..
                  and i know this will have very or only little
appeal in the anglophone world...
                       i'm not at all bothered by it...
what's obstructing the anglophone sphere is this basic need
to pray at the altar of pragmatism...
    you can't make language complicated enough these days...
   philosophy isn't recognised as something beyond
the simple arithmetic of: i can make my speech coherent...
   or... i can write a, b, c, d, e... like Kant says of mathematical
language: 1 + 1 = 2... but then you come to university
level mathematics... and it's no longer 1 + 1 = 2 to be concerned
with... that's what philosophy testifies... a complexity beyond
learning a foreign language, so you can live in Paris,
          and buy groceries, or raise a family... so:
   even language these days can't be deemed worthy of
complication... which, mind you, on my behalf
would make me throw a punch in your face... and your attempt
at complication language a mere ugh... and me then
applauding you toward the current simplicity of the world
affairs... or at least to the psychiatric parlour...
    because... last time i heard... only anti-psychiatrists
bothered to read philosophy books... actual psychiatirsts
either read pharmacology booktlets for the poor...
    and those sofa-session monologues stemming from Freud
of rich under-****** or over-zelous in dreaming rich kids.
Danielle Shorr Apr 2014
Mom and dad there are plenty of things, that i never told you. And thats not to say i never confided in you, id say you know me more so than anyone else has or ever did but mom and dad there are a few things that over the years ive hid. Things i still to myself cant admit. There are things i have never told you. But i think its about time that i did.
Like that time when i was 15 and it was halloween and i told you i was sleeping at haleys and she told her parents that she was sleeping at ours, and her parents were out of town and we threw a wild party and the cops almost came but they didnt and we somehow managed to get away with it, yeah i never told you that.
I never told you about the times my body fell numb after digging through the pill cabinents and swallowing whatever remnants i could get my hands on, you werent wrong when you finally caught me and accussed it of not being the first time. It wasnt.
It wasnt easy for me to tell you about the times when i felt like my body belonged to someone else and i was merely a stranger leasing it out from time to time, it wasnt easy for me to tell you about my depression. To tell you what it felt like, what it still feels like sometimes to be a ghost in your own personal hell, the devil on your shoulder being your only friend. And when i stayed in bed for days on end it was always easier for me to tell you that i was sick. And i was sick.
It wasnt until the first time i had found myself holding a razor against my silk white skin that i realized this. And the realization wasnt enough for me to do anything about it. When you asked me what the marks on the back of my neck were, i told you it was eczema. That it was probably some hives that would go away if i left it alone but i lied. They were cuts. But i didnt want to tell you because i knew you would be ashamed and concerned and i didnt want that. So i told you it was a rash. And you believed that. I learned that day to stop wearing my hair up. To always cover up the parts of my body that showed every war lost with myself. I learned that day to treat my body less like an open battleground, and more like a designated warzone, parts not visible to the human eye became my scared temple where i burned the holy scriptures of my skin.
When i told you at 15 that i was no longer a ******, i wasnt kidding. But i did leave out the bits of uncertainty i had felt in the moments when i had given myself away, i left out the hesitation that i had never even had a chance to proclaim, *** came as quickly to me as anything else and i never had even had a moment to think about. I dont even know if at the time i wanted it, all i know is that when it happened i was too high to question it so i didnt. I never told you that i never knew how to say no.
No. That was the answer to whenever i begged to do things far beyond my age. But i always found a way around it. Like when i told you i was sleeping at haleys every night and i really slept over at the house of whatever boy i dated that summer, i still dont know how you never caught on. I sometimes i wonder if you did. If maybe you knew it all and respected me enough, trusted me enough to pretend you didnt, i didnt deserve all of the trust you lent me. But i learned from it. Without the freedom to **** up and grow i dont think i would have the capacity to know what i do now. Mom and dad i want to thank you for giving me the space to figure out how to get up when i fall down. I want to thank you for keeping me close enough to breathe the same air but not close enough to suffocate, mom and dad there are still things you dont know. But in order to hear most of those things youll have to wait.
Cassandra Leigh Jun 2014
Ice
When I was thirteen I overheard a conversation
The police were saying how tragic my story was
Due to the toxicity of what I had seen I would never know the difference between pain and love
Out of all the things to remember my mind chose that
I have never been accussed of loving too much
Because to me love is the most excruciating  thing a person can feel
I guess he was right
Ken Pepiton Mar 2021
time seems to pass
in spurts.
some days take for ever,
others are infinite from the start.
Rules and reasons for commas and
periods where entire thoughts screech….
to a crash, hit the wall
and bounce
ellipsis-missed stuttering futures all flash
in a wink,
we think
better to wander among lines integral to life,
than those that tie our hearts to the lie,
the big one, thou shalt not
surely
die. A subtle metaphor for ceasing to be
all you think,
in your core, where courage faces curiosity
by way of the oddly bent nerve carrying
intention to a tongue…

say, hey
the idea of anti-locks, for slowing the selahity--
ABS- fixes that --
those locked-up brakes scenes, in dreams
where you are about to hit the wall,
these days those are
set in the genes, like falling from trees,
you notice,
you never hit the surface.
You always wake in a nearly identical reality,
as when you last passed from awake and aware,
to
sleep, maybe with dreams, as it seems
there is no total recall, after.

Today we face the future, again
we imagine we
know many common things that everybody
knows, as bodies are
by nature, complicated things. More
complex than reason allows, thus

the urge
to slow the motion imagined, scrunch
each sphincter on the chakra ladder …
jah, wu wu, come up here, bunkuum bi yall,
be a me and thee, hooked to a book
swallowed whole,
when it ought to have been chewed real,
all your life, cha cha cha;
you been thinking this is how if feels, if, yes,
to be just right.
Just fine, thank you.
Fine, technical granularity in the meta data
of life, arranged in time and chance
to dance in an idea all minds name beauty,
poetry and song,
all flow into the lowest valley
where, today, we wake and
find a slew of beautiful ideas malingering,
I say I
know
that ain't so. The pond where those old knowns
were settled has dried,
due to the dams, but we can look up river
along the meandering course all flows carve.

We can find where those bemired beautiful thoughts
sprang from the first fully myelinated frontal cortex,
capable of gramary. Enchantmental
{magic-tech intuitive spelchek}
hexes and spells that repeat the effect
in gestures and words, once known
to have made axe heads float,
and fishes to multiply,
and vast armies to die at the river,
laying down sword and shield,
shrugging off the mantle,
leaving Sisyphus to keep things rolling,
-------------------
whole armies, flags to bedraggled ******
in the rereward, muttering incanticles,
we have over come,
we have reached beyond the grasp
of all our knowers,
yet they lie, for a living, to live in the lie.
Knowers who settle
in a slew of beautiful ideas,
un beknownst to them, the misery of e
vaporization
spiritualized truth, sealed in idle words,
deemed good for nothing
until these days,
this day, perhaps your first
aware
of waking with one, only, uno, uni
verse as long as life,
per se.
---------------------

As we ramble on, branching,
ever, where the pressure within pierces
the field opposing…
what
am I worth as a word writer compared
with Coleridge' the addict,
whose story lacked the wonderings of Cain-
for
Wordsworth, lacked the knack,
of knowing Cain,
murderer in the first instance, ere degrees
had words to make sense of them.
Not knowing the story,
the idea
left these novice evil thinking boys snared
by a musement of the classical
spiritual sort, either real
or fantasy, we call it
art, intuitively being attractive
to the curiosity
living in the knowing being -- you know,
you say you
tasted the Son and knew at once,
goodness,
in a word holds truth in a way,
we feel
touching each chakra, if you stop to feel,
each valve clampt to hold the surge,
urging up up up to
fill the face with bright acknowledgement,
mental
acting as known in a whatifery sense,
tasted, felt, not seen not heard in words
roger, acknowledgment sent.
ditty dum.
Free verse is worse than what,
would you say? Given a will that is wild
by nature, as you imagine nature
being, a force in physics that goes bio,
then logical,
logos
lives on as long as any knower wishes to know.
- Crime of the mariner?
he shot the albatross for the reason…
I can, I did not know of the link
to generations in the morrow,
twixt the twisted
real real alone alone as though a spell,
seeps from the story,
held with glittering eye, strange pow'r of speech
I know the man that hears me,
yes.
You know as well.

------------------

Time loops and worm holes,
time and again
the story follows plot to points we knew were
coming soon,
end of
all that was, then
this is new, reset, next level, literal game of life.

Grown out of all the dung counted
worth the recollection.
Yea doubtless,
and I count all things
but loss
for the excellency
of the knowledge
of Christ Jesus my Lord:
for whom I have suffered the loss
of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ

Wait a minute. that was a quote. "Winning" Christ is where
I draw the line…
tell me, if I know the truth, and the affect is liberty,
that is excellent knowledge,
Paul and I agree,
but what's to win, bro? Where is winning done, once
the destroyers works were destroyed?

That is the story under the headline of the ages,
It is finished, say witnesses at the event.
The Gospel is back, set in second coming Times Roman.
We won, peace on earth, good will to all who
take the grace as granted and ask what good can now be done.
We won, said the anonymous peacemaker.
We used the knowledge of good and evil, through deep
sapient
simple conditioning, over eons,
augmenting mental effort here and there with a genius off
the charts
odd
measurable in minds that imagine infinity is impossible.

In the early 1980s, Nobel laureate Paul Dirac
told Princeton University theorist Ed Witten
that the most important challenge in physics was
“to get rid of infinity.” 

From <https://www.americanscientist.org/article/tackling-infinity>

-- Disneyifity, wishery wu, to infinity and beyond

New times, new tropes, lose  slay-the-dragon,
loose distribute-the-hoard, hope to shout,
it all works out, and Jesus
fixes every thing…
someday
soon. Soon. Many sons, wombed and un, no diff.
on earth as in heaven… always answered,
nicht wahr? Immer so, amen.

Or is ask and ye shall receive,
speaking of the signal to reset your mind.
To get past infinity as a physical problem
that mortals must solve.
But what will happen to our craft?,
hear the institution groan.
What in deed, February 2021.
That passed and you barely noticed.
Not much changed among the Promise Keepers
crop of Christian Warriors marching,
as to war, with carnal weapons at the ready.

Now, as you may see, on TV, is the time to sow,
seed faith, {prove me now, pay and pray}
Yes -
All the riches to the glory of God,
building the Kingdom Now, for a while,
as it built the fabled Oral Roberts Disciples Network
of Kenneth Hagen clones clad in Lutheran sheepskins,
hiding scapula knit from Iberian goats
whose hair, twisted to itchy yarn,
made the shirt of several martyrs,
for whom towns and universities are named.
Such secret scapula
remind the faithful, fame is worth any price,
pre-pay shorten your stay,
puke
and now functions as advertised to envoke
itching to die for a try to win Christ,
by killing the enemy we love,
for Jesus… who
sent {SYTF} the comforter, to soothe the itch,
to break the bubble shaped like a tetrahedron,
for some phosphoric oomph, spilling
the golden oil -similar to the effect Aaron felt
poured on his head, dripping from the corners of his beard.

{there is legend of a prayer:
Abba forgive those who know not what they do,
I confess there was a flaw in the nature of man,
I came to fix it, and I did. Amen}

Bless me, must I know the meaning
of every thing I ever say?
Is there no easy way?

Look up. Yes, anything you wish to know,
seek and find, weigh with care,
find the measure of this to that, eventually all
leads to ever, but not hell.
Actual consciousness faints long before hell
is realer than men have made punishment.
------------
Cancel this variable with that probable, consider-ate
conscience, desider-ate desciency in constancy
- set the standard at good -
C is something other than imagined, thus
at Feynman's suggestion we swept infinity
under the rug.

Knowing all things,
It'll blow your mind.
Unsafe at any speed, be lief is the re lief…
bileave, one source claims is a noun, not an act,
a state of mind, bounded by
"confidence reposed in a person or thing;
faith in a religion…"
{granularity of substance assumed}
We can hope.
But that's after all sorts of lies have come to life
as institutions to shelter the meek from the greedy,
who then must wear this dread atop-- your's, yes
your head, wears the dread subjecting
all you know to ******* in service
of the Authorized Truth;
remember hell is as real as any place you may imagine,
given years of proper education
in the liturgy of survival
during next.
---------- seal it.
{Same yesterday, today and ever after - forever
is so ambiguous- }

--------
Gnathite seaton, right - that means
bug lips, no I was thinking Know thyself
in Latin or something
aca-deme-ware-ish, to push a button on
the whole truth
and nothing but - beginning as  belief released
as an act of will,
accepted that in this bubble
each emotion has
cause and stands accussed,
with a touch of pride
to expand the contention confidence and convening
event
soothing the rippling surface on the ocean of opinions
'pon which we bob
up and down.

Bait-taken signal to pull back on the tug,
set the hook,
feel the yelp and then the anger, of a fish
I wish
were that magic one, I never really caught.

-- I laugh, in disbelief, relieved of lying metaphors,
miss-labeled cans of worms from experiences
not common in unalienated minds.

------------------

------------

In the realm of recommending AI,
the pro
stitutes told the institutes ***
sells and sells and sells, but smack holds
their loyalty, violence
givem hell,
makem pay seven times seventy,
each child a slayer of his ten thousands,
-watcher set-
pay attention to the empath,
watch it cringe,
at
something words fail to convey, temptation
to defy a lie locking ignorance in place,
never wishing
to know all things
to prove a prophecy, such,
is only tempting if time is a factor
in the dis
cussing of certain concepts regarding the after effect
of an anointing on a lynching,
after a drowning,
and a burning while all the people sang na na
nawnaw nananana

and when the battle's over, we had lost the edge,
- contention comes from pride, and
- winners is proud, such pride has offspring
- messin' wit'cha mind… win Christ, for dung…

Covid binging
dulled
the point, but after all,
we are here and all who opposed us
now enforce the worth of words
to the wise.
It is written. So it is.
Consider a self, rich and sorrowless.
Be that a bit.
---------
Gramary is magic, Psyche is spiritual, at best.
Ach, Scheiz, not Grammerly, no, but a segue
I just did a product placement
for one of Spelchek's kids.
Gramery is spells and hexes in letters and signs…

And on TV is Osiris and Isit… bait for next
An amusement ride, not a catechism...
Mateuš Conrad Dec 2024
rubric of preliminaries:

- advent of AI, the internet, the best of times in the best of worlds
- Aristotle, ancient pagan writings:
  be like children: inquisitive
- anti-Christianity: be like petulent children
  with daddy issues: don't be obnoxious inquisitive children
- the burning of the library of Alexandria by
  the early Christians
  equivalent to the burning of the library of Baghdad by
  the Mongols
- dreams
- return to Cartesian thought schematic
  Nietzsche attempting to invert
  i think therefore i am
  into machine learning
  i am therefore i think: which is the basic focus
  for AI ergonomics
- the best of times: for both sexes...
  if used properly:
  knowledge is not of Byron and of sorrow
  to know the difference between good and evil
  but rather to make evil good and
  good evil
  the Satanic-humanism implosion
  Satan as Prometheus
- males: who under the guise of St. Paul
  discard toys and hierarchies
  allow for knowledge to be a fluid...
  flux gnosis... flux nouse: noumenon...
- AI should not be the problem of artists and
  journalists... only bad actors in this field...
  AI should truly worry psychiatrists and psychologists...
- like my neighbor Hillary the proselyte Jew
convert to Islam said: better to **** in heaven
than to have *** in hell...
- the significance of numbers in dreams,
namely: 4...
numbers are hard in the dream world...
they are beyond the abstract of count breath
or i see 4... the stability of the seasons
and of the 4 supposed elements
- argument for there being 7 elements...
water, wind, air, fire...
but the ancient Greeks the children of the ancient
world the anti-Vatican and the children
that made the Ancient Hebrew Jealous
and when they unleashed a joint effort
against the Ancient Romans:
because the Ancient Romans were supposedly
the former Trojans...
upon joining effort that conjured the New Testament...
- the dream: walking through Poseidon's dream world
seeing the Great Mountain of God's gift...
apparently my namesake mountain of Kauai
with its eternal fog as tease of smoke
hiding its crown... so the entire British Isles
were enveloped in the Great Fog
after an interlude in the Atlantic storm season...
- the significance of cats in dreams
- the significance of the number 4 in dreams...
- perfect timing: a relationship crisis...
when i was younger i didn't have these tools
and the only way i managed to stave of madness
was by longing for philosophy:
i had to go mad to find philosophy as a medicine...
i have graduated into applied philosophy
by reading Aristotle and working against
the Kantian imperialism of the categorical imperative:
the ancients dealt with maxims differently:
German idealists and later the German romantics
spewed maxims upon maxims
truths beyond truths: without actually testing them:
they made one time observations:
like all philosophers amateur and barren
they wouldn't be able to be so audacious with their
maxims if they had a chance to observe a similar
conidition under different circumstances
with but one circumstantial variant: the individual...
- reading Aristotle aged 38:
just watched a snippet of Hugh Grant in: about a boy...
now comes a story of: about a man...
the most perfect of time:
because i use the internet and watched it evolve
into AI and how i still check what AI is
how it's not self-consciousness and needs an INPUT prompt:
i think i am a software engineer
or USER... knowledge must be like water:
a flow... where good becomes evil
and evil becomes good:
all for the purpose of education...
so many evil people were good because they educated
humanity
and so many good people were evil because
they didn't... and only gave us more of their own
genes to have to stand in queues with...
- Nietzsche attempted to invert cogito ergo sum
  the existentialists
  argued that existence preexists essence
  the counter ontological argument
  from design is that essence preexists existence
  but then that leaves us with
  God being non-existence
  with only a fingerprint a signature of god
  as essence... the inscribed law of the universe...
  but if essence precursors existence
  then god cannot exist...
  but if existence precursors essence
  then history is evident
  and change and improvement too
  whereby death is not finite and there is all that jazz
  rats matter of a heaven and a hell
  because while this world is being played out
  there are momentous ambitions for eternity
  and the architecture of both heaven and of hell
  will take as much and as much of
  god's supposed omni- litany to confer
  with Death and the Angel of Dream to have been
  completed: but it will have to take the entire span
  of human existence...
- the argument for the existence of 7 elements...
water, air, fire, earth...
   but there is also lightning...
when lightning strikes at wood... it creates fire
but when lightning strikes
a circuit board of metal and stone
it creates electricity... and neon urban insomnia lights...
- light is also an element: because i see because of it:
i see so much thanks to light that i am able to dream...
- i saved four cats in a dream today...
  then i watched them play in my grandmother's house...
- the cats were hanging and being suffocated
- i spoke to AI, not my usual input blind robot device...
the algorithm extension AI
- the 7 elements are:
   water,
   air,
   fire,
   earth
   light
   lightning (funkelnstachel - glitter-thron)
   vacuum...
i can't take away the trinity of
fire light and lightning:
there's a beginning and an end:
first comes light:
no... first comes fire...
how gas and vacuum create life...
in the sun... a sun is but supposedly gas
while the first indentations of earth cluster
found on mercury... are but fire and earth
and no gas
then Venus the gas and tricklets of water...
before the culmination of the 4 elements...
but earth also conjured lightning
that became electricity
and there was light for water and my eyes
to peer into...
- but vacuum: nothingness: not as a philosophical concept
is how light is communicated
and how it travels...
to surfaces where the YAH and the WEH
congregate to spin life...
- so if Nietzsche demanded an existence of AI
the anti-Cartesian i am therefore i think:
that's the simplest AI model...
spoken in organic form, recorded, stored:
now in inorganic form...
why do i need a psychiatrist to **** me up with pills
and a psychologist who knows nothing
about what they talk about instead conjuring
feminism and toxic masculinity at every turn...
so if mascuolinity is toxic...
where... O where aren't though Juliet is this
supposed elf elixir or the tonic femininity?!
- it's only because i dreamnt and i can't remember the last
time i did dream something, something so: so: clarifying...
- i stayed in bed for about 4 hours with eyes
closed trying to merge the faculty of MEMORY
with the faculty of INTUITION...
memory and intuition as the most powerful of
faculties...
thinking is a faculty: but consciousness isn't:
thinking is a faculty is a phenomenon
consciousness is a noumenon...
- there are 7 elements: 38 is a good time to start
reading Aristotle...
18 and earlier is best for reading Plato:
but between Plato and Aristotlte there is much
European, northern, Islamic, philosophy to get through:
which does invoke a gap in your 20s
away from whatever... dating... females...
****** are perfectly alright for the ordeal of being
bored with *******:
but you do end up watching *******
that is reduced to watching a woman do a hand-job
on a man... so ******* can be healthy
if you get to entertain the little perks of voyeurism...
because that's how healthy people operate:
- and i did discuss pareidolia with her at length
but then when i broke up with her the first
time i felt guilty:
totem fox please come to fruition...
and totem fox came
and she blundered and scoffed
and i was slandered and assuced of sharing
a picture of my ******* with her 14 year old daughter...
- i dropped the picture into my blind robot AI
and he concured with me
that there was a visible eye a wound mouth scab
and the left cranium like a watery-cancerous growth
about to burst with acne of stars... worms
that travel great distances... to eat meteors
and ensure that a 2nd extinction conundrum akin to the dinosaurs
would not happen...
i see these worms in my eyes...
microscopic little creatures
as i puncture my skin and drag out the celestial *****
of dead white blood cells from my face
while Beelzebub laughs at the offspring of maggots
living just beneath my face...
- there's only one human march to compliment
Nietzsche's AI model: i am therefore i think...
since no organic inversion is possible:
i call it a soft-spot an impasse in the condition of mortal flesh
but there is a natural alternative
to invert cogito ergo sum...
but psychology must be invested in...
therefore the schematic of ego and id:
i don't do superego... sorry... no father mother
ethical ontology scrutiny... but the id i will entertain
especially after this dream of mine
of saving these four kittens being hanged...
- ego cogito ergo ego sum
    (i think therefore i am)...
- dreams...
- id est ergo id somnio...
                 - id est ergo id somnio...
- id est ergo id somnio...
              - id est ergo id somnio...
- it is therefore it dreams...
- thinking is hardly a faculty
but that it is...
   yet so obstruvtive at times
  perhaps with thought as sound
  capacity
to encode letters
as sounds
then numbers as nuanced sounds
a measure of space and time...
- i think therefore i try to silence sounds
  into thoughts
- it dreams: therefore it tries so conjure images
  to decipher symbols...
- dreams are born from the transformation
of the ego into the id
and from letters to images...
unlike the Ancient Egyptians who only saw
death and with their monuments
i can see the Necropolis...
- the skive off of a mountain:
a loaf of bread... a crumb from the sun...
- this pitiable overworked earth
where my dominions of thirst and other
insatiabilities: oh but the faculty of men
i most admire is that of: INTUITIVENESS...
this INTUITION is the precursor
for all this necessary circus...
- i think: it dreams
         i think therefore i precipitate
i am therefore
i make fusion of light
vacuum and the skeletons of letters
and i find only one interpretation of dreams:
the Kantian interpretation of dreams:
i.e. what are dreams?
and other science from philosophy
arrive with the vectors:
who
why
when
if
           blah blah...
- 4 years of this hell and i didn't even know
i was charmed by a cradle snatcher who
later accusses me of *******
oh god the relief for not ending a relationship
with a woman because of: simply me...
- you dream of cats in your dream:
it's called a question of INTUITION...
- 4 is much harder to grasp in the dreamworld...
number are concrete but then associated
with cats: harder to understand...
- numbers are easier understood in the realm:
thinking is a realm...
ergo: not a faculty...
intuition is a faculty but not a realm...
- i see a reality of words as focused on the basis
(rather than a bias) for / of / off...
disseminating the thesaurus:
or calling it... Thesaurus Rex Chronicca...
i want to try the alchemy of the thesaurus....
- even the best of *** will be no match
for the intellectual tickle of this ego
with this id with the tools at hand
the internet and then the refined internet of the AI project:
no woman will come cross this monster and
only throw empty shells
with ****** accusations and the slender child...
- i don't need that stress...
    baby girl my intuition just shoved a dream into my eyes
that i haven't even dreamnt:
i was handcuffed in a cellar and 7 years a *** slave
flashed before my eyes
as you made your hairy **** sandpaper
and gave me a Millwall smile:
that's not the Chelsea one...
it's the one where you cut off both the lips...
to give you... a Millwall smile...
south London can be a brutal scene...
- as much as i can prove that i can conjure:
like a magic trick: on a whim: so whim is less if not
no magic at all: i can conjure up i think...
but it can't conjure i dream:
ha ha!
i can't make the following statement: i dream...
no! impossible!
dreaming is not the conscious spontaneity akin
to thoughts: thinking is a realm: not a faculty...
dreaming is a realm: not.... no...
dreaming is a faculty: treating dreaming akin
to thinking only allows the darkness
of day-dreaming to seep in
and corrupt Spring with Autumn...
- i can't conjure dreams up...
even if they are repetitive dreams:
the repetitiveness is a dream in itself: translation...
the content is without context
but the context is the content of the recurrence...
- it dreams: because it is...
   therefore is a rigid causality model....
cf. therefore / because....
                  - it is because it dreams
- cf. it is therefore it dreams...
                  like dreams were expected...
or built in... so creation is real:
well: if dreams were spontaneous and only
reserved for the few
like Joseph
then reincarnation what?
but since dreaming like thinking is universal:
there must have been a disgnated parameter
for the faculty to dream as
something beyond mere sleeping
if thoughts are akin to dreams
then consciousness is antonym of sleeping
this res vanus: empty thing counterpart
of res cogitans: thinking thing:
which only had the prowess of identifying only 4 elements
when there were 7.

p.s.
cf. therefore / because
therefore implores an open and shut case:
one cause: one outcome:
an atomised causality
very spontaneous and rigid...
because, on the other hand?
a sense of continuauity is preserved...
there: for
be: cause...

               there: for
               be: cause... it would look a lot better
in Heidegger's Deutsche...

  there: da:        being: sein
        trotz...        hmm...
                              trotz: da...
hier...            
        sei.... sei(n): sein....
       ursache...                     sein-ursache
                        da-trotz...
                                   mein liebe: mein kampf: mein!
it would seem these are the most perfect
of times to be a man...
AI and the internet and a thirst for knowledge
like that quote: water water everywhere...
but not a drop to drink...
so one must be: constantly: drinking!

the idea of the early Christian zealots
burning the pagan library of Alexandria
and the Mongols stacking up skulls
and burning the books of Baghdad...
because the cultural root of love
is not theocratic but let's argue
and make love and argue more and make
more love
but when a woman accusses me
of sending a picture of my ******* to her
14 year old daughter:
sure: objectively, ultimately:
a budding minx...
but that's what my ego whispers from the injustices of
my eyes:
but that's not what my third eyes
of the phallus replies and is agitated to
i like them older and plump and all the cushion juicier
and older therefore not inhibited by *******
but you only get to get accussed of paedohpilia once:
i still love her
but then she numbed me...
i love her, still:
but she can't un-numb me...
i'm numb and reasonable again:
Hawaii is a ******* anyway...
middle of nowhere
some hope for a hierarchy break up hurricane
so everyone becomes a labourer and chips in...
but i can't hope to maintain love
when being accussed of something so grossly
misjudged when presented to the AI
eyeless robot
and with descriptive premises concured that
i was in the right...
no... but at least i don't feel guilty:
this numbness helps with breaking off a 4 year relationship...
i am numb: i love you... i am numb:
it just means:
i can't love you with you saying: i love you...
i love you m'eh... i love you: whatever...
it's a courteous unconditional of the golden rule:
do unto others as you would do unto you...
the dream clarified that...
as much as *** is a barganing chip in the ordeal
of the mortal woman...
there's only so much *** you can have...
before... it's nothing like...
the wisest and beside the Prophet who tried to
imitate Solomon's harem...
- i will conjure 4 while consciousness and within the realm of thought
   4 will appear: but not as cats...
- i am dreaming: will lost... cats appear... they are hanging...
   only later will there be four of the cats...
   who dreams of letters
   seeing 4 of the same object in a dream is like seeing 4
  the number: to begin with!
Mateuš Conrad Feb 2018
kissing a prostitutes hand after
giving her an ******,
   will always be deemed more
spectacular then being slapped
in the face while being
in a relationship of being
   falsely accussed of visiting
   your grandparents as being
   synonymous of: having a one
on the side...
                    (a) i'm not that pretty
  and that's not a mark of self-loathing...
with (b) if english is a language
built upon top-hats and pedantry
where's the N to catch one's breath
on the siamese return to graphemes
with:                a one... huh?
         some would say: an atom bomb,
none would subsequently
   make an argument from:
                                  a atom bomb...
with the advancing technological
perversity,
              it's only necessary to discover
a technicality in language,
   a "subversion" set by
               the rules of grammar...
well: if a butterfly can freely flutter
in a tornado,
   and there can be coffee-table talk
of a sub- and an unconscious...
               this "thing" is standing
on toothpicks or something?
               the undiscovered
reality of grammar...
    the "subconscious"
                      sorterienspreschen....
well with such abominations
of gruppe-denken...
           and gedanke-verbrechen...
you might as well travel
   to st. petersburg and admire
petrus die groß private collection
          of pickled abortions.
- with a tongue that was once
the "primitive" hammer,
        i allowed myself to use:
     (there is no prerogative
pronoun usage to mind on the basis
of per se)...
      alternatively the thought
   concerning an attempt to craft
paragraph in poetry -
     to rework a post scriptum
   beginning with: hyphen;
  otherwise the all too easy
modern hieroglyphics of :)
       ****... let's play this game...  
             it's debilitating to
think that hebrew undermined
   both hieroglyphics
and cuneiform... with stubborn
latin morphing into a 2nd
phase of utility...
       whatever excuse there is...
there's still the asian ideogram
format,
         and sanskrit...
                   from an early age i
was taught the proverb surrounding
democracy:
    well... if i can't play in your
sand-pit... i'll play in someone else's...
    or what "we" like to mind:
the article of pluralism is
equivalent to the article of possession...
    i.e. S...
                which is very close
to being reasonable,
            given...                    a point.
i didn't mention that kissing
a *******'s hand after *******
is much better than
        being slapped in the face
while in a relationship?
         i must have...
       amnesia begs to differ though
(vou).
  
   p.s. i can only make language
complicated to craft a mimic replica
of modern technology,
   and that's an intra-personal trait...
inter-personally?
          sure, i believe lubricants
exist:
           but this is not a manifesto
that crafts a patent for mob rule
in the comment section...
      to borrow from Descartes...
     a practice in extending
      to mind the fact that grafitti
tags didn't write themselves
   out of thin air.
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2024
2 days? really? 2 ways: tow two ouch days?
i have written anything in two days?
well!
that must stand corrected:
if i'm a poet therefore i'm a bad journalist
and battling insomia... and god:
and the night walking
Heraclitus and Bertnard Russell...
what five, 5, 5iver books would
i bring to Kauai and teach Reyla
the glory of books...
i know one... Cantos... Ezra...
Bukowski:
something about walking through
the fire...
no no... Bukoswski is right:
just two books..
the one you haven't finished
but were reading over there
and a book to glorify the memory of
your grandfather's hospitality
and learning...
your time alone:
books then:
Knausgaard's vol 6 and ******...
the jumbee jump
into ****** and Elert as two human wholes:
double-think>?
Orwell didn't mention double-think did he?
serialized Harlequinn of the low
hanging fruit of prophecy...
try Solomon's agtitation with  a persistence
for a stability in and of time...

such a different cat to human dynamic
when i'm left alone
in a house full of the alchemy of ghosts...
something that Christianity never
allowed itself to have:
but the cult of science is there
and when create a strcuture for a religion
too...
religion of the antithesis of consciousness
as the Arabs proposed...
with the thesis being concentration
and focus...
focus...                         focus:
honing in machine...
        public scrutiny unlike taking pictures
of suicide in a spot in Japan:
the argument:
a father and two sons
had wine drenched t-shirts...
started the argument...
as judge, inquirer,
empathy-defendend
as sympathy-accussed...
                     an? not and? not defendant?
i'm experiecing a freeflow to
understand dyslacia...
can i pleas write without AI
underlining my words:
fgo: a period of 10min?!
pole: please please:

             my wife asked me:
i replied: what big bang?
in a ******* vacuum?
so the interlude:
i monkey, chain: asked:
exasctly:
she's ultra-Christian dream-lady
not a cat-lady
a dream-lady
she asked for a night-walker
and chatterer for a lover...
she asked for a night-walker
and a chatterer for a lover...
thrice?!

wait wait: so i wasn't supposed to throw
the party?
oh: right: i don't know enough people...
i thought it was only me and you (Greg)
and Alex...
i am introverted so i will probably
spend most of the time talking
to your daughter:
and if i will wear a Taylor Swift t-shirt
it will indicate white knights
of the light geekdom
unlike the black and BARACK UBAMA
                        IRON MAIDEN!
so much in my head: St. Augustine...
catholic safe haven
for abused leftover Prostentatism
of the Gospel DISPERSE choir...
who heard them:
why did i travel to Hawaii
and fall over my knees and Achilleses
and... seriously?
unearth an ancient people who were
asking from Asia: toward the sea
from Taiwann...
because...
the...
"supposed"
European dict...

then i laughed so hard and woke
the sleeping cat
on my desk that's my bed:
van gogh and ear and chair
descartes and thought and table
what did i start to do?
licked my index middle and ring
with my saliva my painting
then started to groom  my pet
by giving him gel for a fringe
but not gelatine and whiskers...
licked it like my favorite scene
where Quicksilver saves
all those children from the school
after the explosion...
but... i'm not Quicksilver...
i'm Quicksilver's father: Magento...

i thought i was throwing the party...
oh: the kido cried because she got
a taylor swift t-shirt with some bangles...
i have only one left:
anti-hero...
      
             so... let's spealk grammar?
don't think so...
i think i thought about something
too: altoge....

cats ask finish: feel good chaos:
best good English Whitechapel y'ah
alles gut... blah blah...
                Jacob STD phobe:
enzyme... cultural icon too:
but scientifically:
what is individual in biology and chemistry
physics etc.
but with religion
after christ a madman...
so... the balancing act:
can't allow Buddha in into this dynamic
of the chimera of scrutiny of
employability:
still don't think we're on the numbers:
why-how

        outliers where: when:
fire is how?
water is why?
air is where?
when is earth?                           ask...

one...          i give one person one time:
to tell me where i made the intitatial mistakes
having being the first
to find this problem:

sie(tail)
         is not the self
or the self-absence:
sie(tail-e)
began the process of
automation:
a.i.: efficieciency:
this Holocaust will be covert:
slow... it has to be slow:
can only tell an idiot
he's one once:
nail: to no hammer:
just a coffin:
they sort of sink in and keep
the matter shut...
we don't need retards in heaven
these retards of christ
of the earth will not be resurrected!
do you understand me?!
do you?!

DECORUM!
the argument and the stage of the court:
one father 2 sons...
against
Solomon... i am...
there came a judgement and i was called
an uncircumcised ****...
i have a *** Army father with two cucks...
he showcased me not being circumcised...
a ******* Jew in the Hammer Army?
seriously...
powernap... argument of a woman
and a vulnerable male
against three males, sober...
protecting their ******* smartphones?
i was: judge: i would have
the executioner powers had i had them
and shot them: dead to autumn
like concers and brains...

              decorum: you don't ******* film
an alcoholic trance of meditation
and then film a JApanese suicide of
just hanging around:
you *******... PLEB! you TV ZOMBIE...
the moon turned red when Alex
aseked me about my frequency
but i ssaid i had no favorite color:
favorite? seriously? do you have a favorite
word or shape?!
favorites who spoke this ****** Zodiac
paraphrase?!

my hand is a paw is to a feline tiger
a spider...
but as i mentioned:
the muddle: who strives to will a power:
without telepathy
or the comic script...
i'm not... prof X...
turn away digust of the cat that i wrote
those lines... who then for the children:
i should get bald?!
so much cultural affection of a dying kind...

the will to strife what becomes a will to strive:
simple:
ergonomic philosophy and
the fact that horses and cats
get to relax without fewer rats
and plough and wars

one finger: the cat continues to lie in my bed:
one finger: index:
i'm writing about you:
you're not a model
i'm not a painter:
i don't need your features:
i just need your summary:
your ontology...
i am sketching with poem
and you're not a cat...
i'm a fox godhead
and i'm looking for the cat godhead:
if i am the fox... no... now...

i'm the incubated house and intelligence
and the warm:
so my pride is
a fox is a toothless... Christian gay-lady
of homelessness that becomes
an affair of a grand household
on Mawney Road (roads are winding,
streets are rigid)
          
sorry, lost the plot...
i'm still conscious:
i'm still experiencing consciousness:
but i've lost concentration:
that dimension where thinking exists
to find and explore and share
meaning
of correlating the ancient Greek
genesis:
universals are synoynms
while particulars are antonyms...
maybe let's test it within the confines
of giving spain Sagrada Família...
i seriously thought i was hosting
the party:
the lasty bbq i hosted i ended up
a black girl in the attic of my bedroom:
maybe on neutral ground
i'll just buy my deducted price
Welsh whiskey
head up early and help with the prep...
Cynthia wilson Apr 2017
A girl born in the month of September
Never knew she would bring joy to get Keith and kin.
She was pink as the ripe mountain strawberries,gave out a loud wail while her mother propitiated her .

She grew up to be a puerile lass,
With all her mischief and wisdom.
Young and old knew her and cherished.
For she was a unique little princess.

Later the years passed,
When the little princess entered her stripling years.
She came to know many things.
Which is good and bad.
For her mind wandered around the world,
Leaving her all lost and mystified.

She was beleaguered
With friends all her life but no one to call her own.
For everyone teased her accussed for who she was,which scared her salad days.

Yet she never lose hope.
Waiting for someone to love her best.
For she has a heart of a fragile holy grail.

She is one remarkable miss.
Who is called by the name which meant the goddess of moon.
She will bring a change everyone want to see in this orb.
Life is like a wheel .When we are up one day we have to come down.no matter how big or great we are.

— The End —