the world may not have given me the chance
to love you as you walk by my side,
but the world did give me the privilege
to love you so deeply.

maybe that's why we can't be together.
because the world knows that when my eyes,
that have always been searching for yours,
meets your gaze,
my world would be different.
for my world would become you.

I have scars etched across my skin
like raindrops that drizzled down and stained
the yellowing pages of your notebook.

I don't like talking about the black outs,
where my mind goes,
what's left of me.

I don't like talking about what triggers them,
or who I am after I come to.

but these scars are physical reminders
of memories I never got to remember.

and every time you kiss them
I think to myself
"maybe even that part of me,
whoever she is,
deserves to be loved too."

and I wonder if looking
at my hands and arms
makes you sad,
or if feeling the raised skin
makes you uneasy
but either way

I love when you kiss my scars
and make me whole.