Sometimes, love is about regret
About things you will never get to have
With the one you shouldn't have let go
Feelings unexplored
Because now, you are with someone else

Most times, its about choices
Bad choices to say the least
To walk away or to stay the pain
To trust your heart with someone else
Not unlike an ***** donation without
A test for compatibility

Every other time, it's about the little things
That make you laugh and cry
That make you smile so hard at odd lone times
That hurt you so much, you want to die

Ultimately, it's about all the things you cherish
But still can't understand
Or stand.

What does it feel like to be brokenhearted
A question for an answer I've never sought
Til' that night at your place for dinner
When you said it was over for real this time

The heart does need time to break
Endless nights of wondering
If this was meant to be, but hoping
Love's a conqueror when it's for real

I loved you, but what about me
That's why I will never get over
The way my stomach felt As I stood up to leave, The process didn't start tonight

I couldn't breathe; the back of my eyes were burning and I couldn't help but scream; nor would I ever know if it was deep inside or vocal
as my heart drowned in the sea of its tears as blood

What does it feel like to be brokenhearted; I won't say that I know still
As though the pain might let up; but the scars, they never go away

Now I just wonder, if she felt the same or worse
The she that I hurt before there wasn't you
Even as I drown in the sea of my own Karma

I once got an inspiration
for a poem about depression

fingers, once excited to hold a pen
lingered over my notepad, unsure

confused by the topic in question
I felt myself get irritated enough
to put the idea to pension

writing used to be fun; not anymore
and so began my days and days and nights
of falling into unnecessary self-written traps

sleepless nights and yawning dawns later
and a few random tears for no reason that I could cater

I realized I was already writing it

DEPRESSION IS NOT A MYTH.



#IamMentallyAware

it is light
it is how i write and write but that's the only word worthy of describing
it is waking up in the middle of summer on your own time
it is closing your eyes with the sun on your face
comfort in blankets when safety is thousands of miles away
free thinking and blushing and taking day-naps
one thousand questions with repeated answers
it is smiling so hard your face hurts
clean sheets and sitting in empty fields
it is car rides with the windows down
the way the moon reflects across water when the sky is deep purple
it is dancing in the refrigerator light
with no socks on
at three am
to a quiet song we hum the next day
it is coffee in the morning
alcohol that stains your brain and makes you feel like you're underwater
it is the first time we touch
with enough electricity to power a city for a week
it is the weightlessness of your laugh
and messy bedhead
it is the way distance disintegrates like poetry
and your promises in prose
always on my mind
in my words
it is that thing people are writing about when they say,
"when you break my heart, it will hurt like hell"

Lost in sight; lost insight

Dust in sight; lost my sight

Life's serving aces

But the gods are overturning

Stuck standing in the middle

A trapdoor is the floor

Falling and falling

Got me thinking I was flying

More crows than doves

Picking on my many demons

Lone Angel; The only blight in all of the dark

Within

Overwhelmed

I was 8
Breaktimes at school were the best
I remember the small field-not-pitch
Where we played football
Not as a game of 22 players
and referees and rules
It was a game of 44;
No, 46 self acclaimed stars
It was a game of the whole school
Everybody against everybody
Indiscriminate of ***
Or skill
Of height differences or body frame
Tackled by your teammates for dribbling too much
You could pick up the ball and run
Rugby style to the opposition post
Then kick to score and most likely, miss
Or get mobbed even before you get to the post
It was all so exciting;
Such disorganization;
So much fun.

Night-times with you
Star-gazing at the skies
Red crimson moon and rainbow colored stars
Those dark times were the best

All of a sudden; yet inevitable
the moon disappears
the stars too
What is this sad blight
The morbid feeling
Of évil in light
Irony's come to play

The light comes and my dreams elope
With the darkness; And you with them
How Beautiful and equally perplexing
My darkness in light