moving out
from the noise
and the drama
and the control
and the good and the bad
loneliness is freedom
but how far is so far away?
is a blank page empty
or just white?
time in the form of a pen will tell

For me inspiration
does not come from adoration
It comes from depression,
or even regression.
And when im in session
is my doctors question
What did you write?

My beginning was nothing
from nothing I come
to a journey to everything
I search for a home.
Like Ulysees I m a wanderer
but his wisdom I lack
as I seek for a compass
myself eludes me in the dark.
Night after night I question
yet  nothing in this world comes for free
As the blood in my veins
screams of violence and rage.
Still I walk the line,
my soul half a bird
Set the other half to find
in this wide wicked world.

A clown in a circus
is only a clown
when the curtain falls
he looks at himself in the mirror
and sees a clown
a caricature
no sadder thing than a clown
especially to himself

Your eyes like twin moons eclipsing

your mouth the door to paradise

your tongue deepens in to me

and from my mouth truth tempts

to my words depths fall and i will make you fly

come to me sweetly like the mist covets the forest

and i ll make you a moon in my darkness

no other in my sky

cascade into me like a storm

dark water all at once

so i cannot escape

you are the prisoner now

in my fantasy

you are my willing slave

my puppet

leather,lace,iron my choice

you surrender to me and me to you
in an endless circle like serpent biting eachother

with the venom of desire

I am my weakness
My weakness is me
Yearning  to trust,to seek ,to find to love.
Love is weakness
Total release of power
Vulnerability to the other,the lover
like a dog showing his belly
to get petted
but knowing you can  end up kicked
will I still look with love and wonder?
What does it think I wonder that dog?
Will he think again of showing his weakness?
Will he be more rabid or subdued?
And what about that ****** leg?
Where is a surgeon when you need one..

In the arena of my chest
a batlle rages fierce and wild
tenderness clashes with raw energy
each blow an echo of your name
My heart like the raging crowd
wants them both to win
Ding!Gloves up!The match is on!
Before  I know,your words ground me
your hips  pound me
****!whats happening to me?
The bell tolls and I am undone
Its unfair!Your side always wins!!
I see the beauty in defeat
my barbed heart in your hands
a battered prize, torn between desire and pride
brimming with warriors blood
careful now,dont hurt yourself.

sunday s dissapointment
six days far
dear oh dear
make me dissapear
I play a game of chess
and go and make a mess
pawn  not a queen
remains to be seen
In front of prying eyes
shredding your disguise
the toughest thing of all
is sunday is gonna come

Ah such sweet smell in the night
Wait!I can t tell,is it mine?
So much warm  blood on the floor
I crave for it as I reach for the door
I know now this house that God with clay built
I ground it out with my sharp,new teeth
All this rage in my head  is it mine?
Or its the shadow of the curse of Caine?
Wherever I look around with my eyes
Behind them the Beast quietly hides
But wait no there are other corpses here!
Allas they cannot walk or talk I fear....
So I am left here cold and alone
Thinking the terible things I ve done
Knowing I will never again see the sun
As my first night as a fledgeling begun...

How can you conceal a flaw?
What you lack
is it seen?
You are judged
by the highest court
yourself
and sentenced
to remain
as you are
an acolyte to your own shadow
in its darkness
your chipped self you hide.