The ceiling looks down
corroded, broken, messy
eyes look up
glassy, lifeless, empty

Is it over yet?

Please
I can’t stand it
Where are you? Where am I?
I can’t commit to anything

Help me
Can’t you—

How are you willing to give yourself to me?
I can’t seem to get close
limbs frozen solid
Im terrified to be so open

But you’re so warm
Melt me
Arms wrap and scorch my waist
******* lips
Im still so terrified.

You don’t know what it's like
To try
And try
And try
With no results

You don’t know what it's like
To cry
And cry
And cry
Tears full of salt

You don’t know what it's like
To die
And die
And die
Every second you're alive

You don’t know what it's like
To lie
And lie
And lie
But nothing
Will ever
Ever
Ever
Get better.

I can't quite remember
the moment
everything
shifted

when I stopped waking up
feeling anything but tired
or when I stopped going to sleep
praying for anything but the end

maybe it was the day you left
physically, I mean
or perhaps the weeks leading up
the weeks that numbed me to my bones

perhaps it was the months that followed
and the way little parts of me
seemed to just
drift away

I stopped looking both ways
while crossing a busy road
stopped being careful
while walking alone in public

I didn't notice when I stopped running
to the safety of my bed once the lights went out
instead I slowly wandered through the house
no longer afraid of the dark or what it could hide

because what can a car
or a creep
or the dark, where my fears would once reap
do that will ever compare to the way
you broke me

The worlds no longer bright
Our sun has been banished
The moon hidden behind the clouds
World wide power outage
All lights gone out