Whole day spent watching
Watching myself, careful
Can't relax, always checking
Just enough, never too much

Blending in, hiding
Nowhere to hide, to be myself
Waiting for night, staying up late
Finally free, alone at last

I                                                                ­                                              
don't                                                            ­                                        
       scream                                                           ­                             
                   for                                                              ­                      
                       help...                                                          ­              

but
whisper                                                         ­                                                                 ­              


my                                                            ­ 
    words
              so                      
                  soft...               ­                                                                 ­  

small                                                  


as to not lose my voice
                         on such a meaningless task 
                                                     that will go unheard anyways

when i said “i’m fine”
what i meant was “i’m tired”
not of you, but of trying to be
the version of me you could love

when i said “take care”
what i meant was “please stay”
but goodbye is easier when
it doesn’t sound like begging

when you said “i’m sorry”
what you meant was “it’s over”
i caught the silence between your words
the way it wrapped around my throat

and now, when i say nothing
what i mean is everything
i never knew how to tell you
while you were still listening