I’m trying so hard to keep it inside
It’s in the surface of my heart
I can’t scratch it
It’s spreading
And then it overflows
It’s overwhelming
It slides down my face
Salty watery trace
I’ll be okay
Just not today

she was beautiful
even at 86 as much as at 21
even without hair
she shined like the sun
as bright as she was
she poisoned herself
one cigarette after the next
her lungs were begging to be set free
and when they finally gave in
she was nothing but a happy memory

The day is long and hard.
And I barely slip through it alive.
I call to my Lord but he does not answer.
And I am left wondering why.
With tears in my eyes, I write this now,
Wondering still when I can come home.
Forgive me, God, I cannot lie;
I do not trust The Great Unknown.

i'm no angel;
sometimes i lick off love
in the edges of a knife.

i'm no angel;
when midnight strikes,
i've got demons awakened inside me.

i'm no angel;
i have vices and flaws and darkness,
a chaos only i, can romanticize.

i'm no angel;
because i realized the violence in love,
the predicament of my demons,
and the chaos in my soul, deeply carved.

IA