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Why is the other side of the world,
Where I can never exist,
Looks so beautiful and prosperous.
Like a home that I could never visit.
Every morning when I wake up,
I remind myself of some advice,
If something is desirable and appealing
To your eyes,
Then please think twice.
Or thrice.
All beautiful things turned out to be dangerous,
Most tasty foods tend to be unhealthy,
Most addictive habits are awful 🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️
this nest of longing
hidden in plain sight
in my eager hands
in my blooming smile
from it i plunge deeper
and deeper till i find
an unknown architecture
for the sky
deus absconditus

time peacefully macerates
my violent heart

i have to oh i have to
rewrite the story of this I
i have to i really have to
crush the nest of longing
for my echo to get lost
in you
a desire to erase,
to stay away forever.

an opportunity to transfigure,
to sit on the floor and wait for storms.

a line to cross, a lion at dusk,
a catastrophist.

a pen filled with acid,
a book of theories full of holes.

once this begins, there are only endings.
~
You're alive, my candle
You're a beautiful and unique wick
About to blow out
In the night of falling shapes
In the night of fever walk
We did the igniting
We did the melting
We do the killing

~
Turbulent upbringings
often teach one
to write out the storm
To all the pairs of unimpressed eyes
Please wait a little longer,
Please give me some more time
To your privilege,
And
My dismay,
I'm a pro player,
In the game of
Self-blame.
No need to worry ya! In the end, it's me.
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