I’ve loved you when I didn’t love myself
You loved me but you only loved yourself
I did everything for you
My heart and soul bled for you
Leaving blood marks on the sidewalks
But you let the wind blow it away
And you choose to see what you wanted
Some of you thinking, this is about my boyfriend
But listen, best friends can break your heart too.
She stuck that knife so deep in my back
There’s no way in hell Im ever going back
I took care of you cuz that’s what friends do
But I like I said, you only loved yourself

This is what disappointments feels like.
Getting your hopes up knowing you shouldn't
Waiting for something that you know in the back of your mind isn't going to happen
Predicting different outcomes hoping maybe one of them will be true
But when the lights turn on and you take off the shades
That deep feeling of dread sinks in because you did it to yourself again
I've felt it all my life

For you
I want to be something more
The mere thought of your angelic name, brings a brush of wind on my skin
Taken, my heart will not let go of you
My brain says to run
My legs are moving slowly
And my heart is beating too fast
What do I do?

I want to explore the lines of your skin
Read every curvature with my tongue
Your tall body will be my art tonight
And baby I always aim to please
Your innocence makes my words still on my tongue
Taunting to leave my mouth
But I leave you be
Innocently, exploring you and your body in my mind.

A pain so strong can cause our mind to snap
Change the reality in front of you,
To see what you want,
Instead of what you need to see.

I think im suffering from intimacy on both sides of the line
With a man...
With a friend
Since I've moved here I feel so...
Empty?
Idk the right word to use,
When you feel like your insides are drowing,
Constantly surrounded my family and people on the street
I look around to check to see if anyone is looking at me.
No one.
Loneliness is one hell of a drug
Once you start feeling that,
It gets the better of you
Riddling your thoughts of foolery,
Tricking you into thinking no one is there
But is anyone here.
I see faces but no eyes.

I made a mistake.
My first mistake was about writing about you.
My second mistake was thinking about you.