Diana

Dec 2020

ɢ ʀ ᴀ ᴄ ᴇ

you are a flower
so tender and dear
as i clutch you next to my still, beating heart

you are a flower
so tender and dear
even as your petals fall apart

you are a flower
so tender and dear
dripping honey into my sincere soul

you are a flower
so tender and dear
and your beauty is vibrant, as your life fades

you are a flower
so tender and dear
beloved by many, and feared by some,

you are a flower
so tender and dear
and, your beauty eternal, as it is ephemeral,

you are a flower
so tender and dear
as my last wish is to be enveloped in your finite love

as you lay, your words i cherished are etched in stone,
you were a flower
so tender and dear

❀

musing about
the beauty & finiteness
of flowers & life

( & a rough practice of
repetition & imagery ! )

#flowers #love #life #death #hope #time #existentialism

Diana Nov 2020

what is language?

i use words and phrases
almost everyday
and yet
i find myself realizing that i do not truly understand
the meaning behind the words i use
and it numbs me
language is powerful
and yet i find myself confused of the one i possess

FORGIVE
/fərˈɡiv/
verb
stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake

have i ever truly forgiven those that i told myself i have
this definition shocked me
i use it often and yet i did not even know what it really meant

COURAGEOUS
/kəˈrājəs/
adjective
the choice and willingness to confront agony, pain, danger, uncertainty, or intimidation

the list goes on and on
...
..
.

Diana Nov 2020

stop staring at the diseased leaves and look at the rotting root

regarding addiction
daniel amen once said
the behavior is not the problem
it is the expression of the problem
that is not to say that the behavior is not a problem
because it possesses the ability to be one
but it is not the problem
the problem is what compelled the individual
to use the behavior as a means of coping
the behavior is an expression
of a human's attempt to find resolution within
it is the diseased leaves
that have manifested from a rotting root
yet we still like to blame and look at the leaves in isolation
we try to treat the leaves
when the root is what must be tended to
but the leaves are easily noticed
the root is not
it is buried behind weeds and soil
it requires more effort and thought

Diana Nov 2020

personal annotations to book quotes

charlotte lucas
once said in pride and prejudice
not all of us can afford to be romantic
and it shocked me to silence
it humbled me in a way that i had not experienced

i would call myself a romantic since birth
and because of this
i had always praised marriage
and naively became frustrated
when love and romance didn't permeate the air
with a couple that was going to marry
that is why this statement shocked me

romanticism is a privilege
it would be at the top of maslow's hierarchy of needs
i understand this
and yet
it blows my mind that people get married
not from love
but necessity
for security
and continuing a family lineage

this is probably one of the most profound statements
regarding marriage and romance
that i have ever heard

and as i continue this delicate dance called life
i will look forward to new moments
of humility
which brings about more
compassion
understanding
and knowledge

Diana Nov 2020

the product of looking beneath the surface

your partner
is a reflection
of your self worth
how they interact with you
is a mirror to the tolerance you have with yourself
to the grace you bestow upon your being
the way they treat you
is an echo
to the way you treat yourself
to the way you allow certain behaviors to be accepted
your partner
is a reflection
of the love that you think you deserve
make sure it is one of substance
one of unconditional love
filled with patience grace and fluidity

those that we surround ourselves with are reflections of our inner worlds that we have with ourselves. we have the ability to see and understand more clearly ourselves through those that we surround ourselves with. so, how much grace do you hold for yourself? do you blindly accept abuse, or do you echo a loving radiance to yourself?

Nov 2020

ghost

Untitled

why should I apologize
for being a monster
when no one apologized
for turning me into one