A loving mother
A rich father
A cute sister and
'caring' friends;

A good life
you would say;

But I know
I am insecured
feeling heavily insecured

Do you know its all
because of
loving mother
rich father
cute sister and
so called 'caring' friends.

I have
an appoinment
with disappoinment.

People say that
it's because
of expectations.

But I know that
it's because of
the people I believed
the people I loved.

The blame is to me
to believe them and
to love them.

Want to master
the art of
turning
the serious senario
into fun
turning
the problem
into a joke
then
no problem....

Why should your pain be shown to others?
Why should your hurts be known by others?
Why should your tears be wipped by others?
Don't you have hands?
Are you not strong?
Are you dead?

If you have tears
then you've your hands also to wipe it
Don't believe anyone
except your hands...

Be like a kite in your life
Be in someone’s control
But fly high happily
As if you are out of control.


Be like a star in your life
Shine brightly
Make your talents to twinkle
But ever never forget
You are a small star in a wide sky.


Be like a balloon in your life
Fill it with good values
Tie it tightly
But never let it to burst.


Be like a butterfly in your life
Let your thoughts fly high
Let your head held high
But others should be in awe of
Not be in loathing of.



- Shyamala

When you are worrying about
something
That'll remind you
about some other thing happened
your past...
your madness...
your tears...
your sufferings...

Justice
is doing right thing

Freedom
is doing things which you like

Happiness
is liking things which you do

Sadness
is thinking about things
which you want to forget

And depression
is still thinking about the same
still finding the answers
still struggling to believe
still dying inside
and living outward.

Don't know what I want
'cause I don't want anything

Don't know what to do
'cause I am not doing anything

Don't know whether I am happy
'cause I am not happy

Don't know how to live
'cause I am just exist....

Hello
Hello
(She recognised the voice)

Hello
Hello...Who is that?
I am so and so
(She is on cloud nine)
Happy Birthday
(She scolded herself that she had to ring up and wish not when he was calling)

I wanted to tell you something
(She knew what he was going to tell)
Yes, tell me
(She was longing....to hear that)

Her heat beat had gone up
Thinking about the next moment
Both the sides dead silence

And She woke up ftom her dream
still her heart was beating
And still it is beating
And still she is longing.......

No one will care for you
as much as you will...

No body will worry about you
as much as you will...

No one will think about you
as much as you can...

It's important to make friends
Not to chitchat
Not to gossip
Not to have fun
It's something more than that.

It's important to make friends
to spend quality time
to share our happiness
to tell our worries
It's something more than that.

Make friends
who can cry with
who can laugh with
who can share all with you
It's real friendship.

What is friendship?
Who are all friends?
How can we make friends?
How can others make us their friends?
Is it a permanant one?
Will it be a long lasting one?

Right now I am nobody's friend

Because I break my friendship
with a few people
as they are playing with my emotions

My friendship is broken by ex-friends
As I am close with so called 'few people'.

I am happy
I am happy to the core
for others
not for me
Why should I show my long face?
Will anything change?
Whatever happened is happened
Nothing can change it
No one will deny
then why should I be sad?
But I am sad
I am sad to the core
'cause only I know the pain....

I lost my happiness and sleep
by loving my friends
more than my family

Now I am repenting for that
no one to rescue me
Memories are haunting....

I want that
only and only
world's best
healing power
DEATH

I am...I am only

They are showering love on me
They are leaving me suddenly

They are talking to me
They are busy as no time to talk to me

They make me feel so special
They make me feel unwanted

I try to stay away from them
They try to get closer

When I try to get closer
I am an unwanted one

They are coming
They are doing
They are going

But I am ...I am only

It was a beautiful butterfly.
It has yet to see the one,
who will not admire its beauty,
but deep in its heart it had a desire.
It was longing to fly
Nobody knew its wish
Alas! Even the butterfly itself
was not aware
it was a painted one
in a frame
hanging on the wall.

If a painting had a wish,
Was it the fault of the painting?
Was it the fault of its Creator?

They will come
They will go
They will love
They will hate
They will stay
They will avoid
BUT WE HAVE TO LIVE
BECAUSE IT'S OUR LIFE.

True love is shown
Fake love is what I got

Selfless love is shown
Pain is what I got

Wish for others' happiness
Tears are what I got

True love is what  I expected
still I got hurtings
hurtings
and hurtings...

I was cheated
I was used
I was befooled
I was broken.

I
Killed
Myself


I
Killed
Myself
In
Such
A
Young
Age

I
Killed
M­yself
In
Such
A
Young
Age
By
Loving
Someone


I
Killed
Myself
In
­Such
A
Young
Age
By
Loving
Someone
More
Than
Myself.

**** yourself
If you are not able to **** the memories.....

Like and Love
four letter words
would make a drastic change
would make a drastic change

Like everybody happily
Don't love anybody seriously
Like attracts many people
Love depends on one person

Like doesn't hold possessiveness
Love makes you possessive
Like gives you delight
Love makes you regret

I like Rose
I can also like Jasmine,Lavender,etc
But If I love Rose
I have to like and love only ROSE

Like 'love' as a noun
not as a verb
Like your father,mother,sister,friends,spouse
give love to them
But, don't love them

Like and Love
four letter words
would make a drastic change
in another four letter word called LIFE.

My life was an imagery
with so many similies...
The scenario it created
made it a romedy...

My life was an irony
with so many illusions...
Wrong motifs were understood
It became a tragedy....

My life is an oxymoron
with so many paradox...
Care for nothing
but everything disturbs...

My life is a tragic-comedy
with so many dramas...
no foreshadowing
but the flashback hurts....

'Life is nothing
but an empty dream"
We can fill the emptiness with love.
Life isn't simple
till you start to love.
'You get in life if you have the courage to ask for'
You get in life if you have the love for others
love the love and
love the life to live.

Lifelong I had been waiting
for the MAGIC to happen in my life

I thought it fulfilled
by your presence in my life

Later I realised
it's not magic
it's a dark ditch

MAGIC is not with others
It's with in ourselves
We have to search for it...

Not aggressive unless provoked
(I am always provoked)

Loves to be loved
(always getting fake love)

Easily hurt but takes
long time to recover
(and I am still recovering...)

All left me
I left all
but not
my belief
charm and
attitude...
Mine is mine always....

Money
Money makes our life honey
Nope


Excess of money
gives fear
to safeguard it


Lack of money
gives us insecurity
towards future


At any cost
Money won't give any happiness.

My diary has
all my secrets
even my best friend
doesn't know them.

My diary reflects me
It has all my
emotions and feelings
which no one observed yet.

My diary was torn once
pages were burnt too
memories were destroyed also
but not from the heart.

My diary was given a new life now
started fresh
with sweet memories
and only sweet memories.

When the tiny eyes saw me
twinkle in my eyes

When the small lips smile at me
magic in my heart

When the tiny feet kicked me
rare radiance and unfathomable delight

When the little fingers touched me
I felt heaven..........

MY PAIN IS MY OWN PAIN
'cause I won't reveal my pain to others
I shared everything with my dear ones
and
the so called PAIN
was given by
the so called DEAR ONES....
Paining inside
smiling outside
That's the trick...

I have everything expect fulfilment
I am alone with everyone
I am happy with all the unhappy situations
I am an optimist in being a pessimist
I am very lucky to have all the unlucky things
I am the best in all the worst things
I continuously succeed in getting failure
I am working hard without recognition
I am comforting myself to get into trouble
I am thinking without sense
I am planning something and doing some other thing
I am expecting all the unexpected things
I stay positive in all the negative things
I am beautiful with my ugly face
I am happy with all my problems
I love myself with so much of hatredness
The utmost paradox is
I am living while I am dying inside.

I thought of studying gives me a kind of satisfaction
I thought of learning reduces lack of innocence
I thought of education gives me an elegant life
I thought of teaching improves my talents
I thought of reading gives me rapturous thinking
I thought of job gives me joyful life
I thought of money makes everyone merry
After crossing all these
Now, I am thinking nothing gives more solace than death.

I love the way
you are going to love me.

I like the way
you are going to smile on me.

I dream the life
that we are going to live

And I am eagerly
waiting for my Prince Charm.

Once there was a girl
her eyes were like a pearl
so innocent she was
so painful her story was

She had a Python as a pet
True love with she met
Her eyes would be always wet
The Python made her life fit

Python and the girl loved each other
Others she didn't even bother
They were always together
All happiness she would gather

Her happiness subsided
when the Python starved
Almost all she did
Her worries started

She cried a lot
The Python made a not
She was caught
The Python's love was naught

Its plan was to eat her
which she was not aware
Losing its love was her nightmare
It's starving to eat and digest her

Her tears taught her a lesson
People gave comfort like a cushion
But to cheat only was their mission
She was relieved from her confusion

People  who are close to you
Are not your real friends
We need to cut their realtionship
Before they mix venom in our life

Now also I am not able to hate you
                  I am not able to scold you
                  I am not able to curse you
                  I am not able to love you
                  I am not able to forgive you
and
Now also I am not able to FORGET you

Her husband presented her
a very long blue saree
Since she has been using it for ages
it has many white patches
hither and thither...

When he roared in anger
striking her with a (f)lash
She'd use her grey saree
and weep bitterly...

Her s(u)on would often come and go
He'd give her a reddish orange saree
in which she looks dazzling...

Her daughter'd visit her in the night
with thousands of her grand children
At the time she'd wear a black saree
She'd narrate them many stories
they'd listen curiously with winkle...

I've felt
happiness as well as sadness

I've undergone
honour as well as shame

I've experienced
peace as well as confusion

I've lived with
truth as well as fake

Yet
I didn't expect
I would hate the people
whom I loved so much...

What makes me a poetess?
-
-
-
-
-
My lovable ones
Nay...
-
-
-
-
-
My friends
Nay
-
-
-
-
-
THE PAIN
THEY GAVE....

After living
25 years
in the earth
I understood
People like only good looks
not good thoughts....

My love on you is rejected
'cause you are a cheat

My love on you is rejected
'cause you are just an attention seeker

My love on you is rejected
'cause you are partial

My love on me is rejected
'cause my three lovable hearts
hurt me heavily in someother way
through love

Because of those rejections
Now I am in dejection

Pain
The moment
When you realise
You had been slave
to someone  who just showed
fake love.

Identity
The moment
When you lose
your lovable ones and
just find yourself how strong
You are...

A teacher they say she is
But more like an angel she is
Every elegant move she takes
Makes the diamond shake,

A true flower her heart,
cannot be shown on a chart,
Graceful as a swan she walks
like a melody her voice she talks

Like an elder sister she is
In a puzzle piece she doesn't fit
because a unique piece she is
A very elaborate one she is.

Stay away from
one who cheats you
one who tells you lies
one who uses you
one who disrespects you
one who critizes you
one who talks low about you
one who backstabs you
Most importantly
one who shows fake love to you

My love
can be named
as game
trick
strategy
but
never mind
and nothing hurts
for a dead one
I am already dead
when I came to know the truth
I am cheated by others
befooled by others...
Never mind
Stay cool....

Meet people
around the world
Interact with them
Be with them
Learn from them
Entertain yourself
Read books
get yourself invovled
in your favourite characters
Next few days
stay home
stay safe...

Still
My mind talks to you
Still
My heart looks at you
Still
My imagination keeps you alive
But
My deep in my soul
I knew
You showed fake love
You cheated me
You made me cry
You are no more in my life...