Why do I love you?
A man who does not love me?
Cannot love me?
Will not love me?
Am I that hard to love?
Or that easy to hate?
Why do I love you, a man that does not love me?
Loving you for so long,
not blind like poems say,
I saw, I saw,
The way you’d look at me,
Not with love, no,
Not like how I looked at you.
I see your good and love you more.
I see your bad and love you more.
I see you and love you.
You see me.
With my eyes upon you,
knowing, knowing,
How deep my gaze is,
How I love you,
Knowing, knowing,
How I knew you did not.
Why do I love you, a man who does not love me?
Why do you not love me, a woman who loves you?
I do not regret loving you,
Nor the feel of your fingertips across my skin,
Nor your voice in my ears.
I do not regret loving you,
Nor knowing the sent of your hair,
Nor the memory of your hand encompassing mine.
I do not regret,
I do not regret,
The pain that I feel,
Nor that the merest thought of you that makes me smile.
I do not regret.
I do not regret.
I do not regret.
Oh how lovers lie.
To regret would mean that I wish,
I wish,
what happened between us should not of happened,
That I would wish,
Wish,
for the memories to fade and disappear.
Now that would be a lie.
Oh to forget this scar upon my heart would be a wound worse than it ever was.
I will bear with its pain using the memories of you to dull it,
Using the love I still feel for you to heal it,
Heal it so one day you will just be a tale to tell of this pale scar upon my heart.
But for now you are fresh and alive in my heart,
And in my heart you will never leave.
I love you a man who does not love me.
I love you, not blindly like the poems say.
I love you man that I love.
I love you all the same.

Dying

I define the self,
With cascading thoughts,
Memories that flutter,
Like stomach knots,
Neurons that fire,
Aware of themselves,
Picking poems and stories,
Like novels off shelves,
But slipping through fingers,
Like arrows do souls,
Glancing off fragments,
That once made us whole,
Reminding the spirit,
We all had a name,
In a place that existed,
Just out of frame.

"In your chest between ribs,
Nestled on breath,
I wither with you,
In the embrace of Death,
Who constantly waits,
Just out of sight,
Breathing my name,
And blowing out lights."


I know I can't love you,
Whoever you are,
You glimmer like her,
And I still have the scar.
It may have switched sides,
It may be content,
But whenever I kiss you,
It acts like a vent.
I am what I am,
I'll make you unhappy.
I'll write her these poems,
Thickly and sappy,
Knowing full well,
She wont see a word,
As the thoughts that she loved me,
Come off as absurd.

I’d stopped.
I HAD!
I promise...
But now it starts again.
New blades
New cuts
New problems...
But still the same old Jynn.
The scars add up to 81,
No, make that 92.
They never seem to go away
Stuck to my skin like glue.
I write this not with anguish
As oft' my poems are.
Just with simple curiosity
At the make-up of a scar.
It starts out with a split
In the gentle human flesh
The blood pours like a flood or stream
Or tidal wave. Nothing less.
The blood runs down
Then starts to drip
As you relish in the sting.
Then you realize
What a mess you’ve made
Grab some cotton ***** to clean.
Wash most of it downs the drain,
Wipe the rest off of your skin.
And once the bleeding settles down....
Pick up the blade and start again.

Have you ever really wondered
What poems really are
It's something hidden inside of us
That we carry like a scar

It's simply raw emotion
That we're molding on each day
'Til the words come out perfected
And we know just what to say

The pen then meets the paper
Like two strangers from afar
Without any sure direction
Like a helpless falling star

It tells us who a person is
Or who they strive to be
It tells us of their *******
And the words that set them free

Some will simply make us smile
While others will make us cry
Some will make us laugh out loud
Or leave us asking why

It's more than pen and paper
It's a burden inside our heart
And if we cannot set it free
It will tear our world apart

I am a bug
You are a garden
Just one more hug
And I’m in heaven

I am an island
You are a sea
Leaving me stunned
And no longer empty

I am a comet
You are a star
Missing you’s become a habit
That leaves me with a scar