Slumped against a wall
Around the back of a
Home,

A week without a rest
and just
A lifetime to
Go.

A golden crown rests heavily
on my head,
Achievement rests light on
My heart,

Bracing for the second when
I start
Seeing stars.

Success is sacrifice,
And sacrifice is pain.
What is a winner without
A life of cruel shame?

Happiness is temporary,
Climbing the ranks is
Life.

I look at fate,
Fate looks back at me,
And I accept the hardship
with

A smile.

Inside me lives the regret of high school.
Was standing beside achievers worth it?
I stood proud, loud; but what did it cost me?

My crippling body—frail, pale, and exhausted.
Was this the trophy? Was I proud to show this?
I was among the great, yet I was a pretender.
A pretender that I was okay with this lifestyle—
To keep up with the pressure, but was I really?

In the end, who was I trying to impress?
Was I supposed to feel this empty?
I achieved something, yet it meant nothing.
I stood on that pedestal, but the crowd was empty.
Now, I carry on the weight of who I tried to be.