I know not what I am
Nor why I’m here
Or where I’m supposed to be.

I think of all the things
I could be, things I should be
Like staring into an abyss.

I could..
Fly, be happy, have love
All these staring back at me

I should..
Make a life, grow up, get old
But they too lie in the abyss

The freedom to pick either.
To be what one could be,
To be what one should be

Freedom presents anxiety
Anxiety creates dizziness
Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom

The abyss stares back
The thickening blackness
Swallowing me slowly


Promising me
The view from halfway down
The peace behind the dark

Entering the door
Leading me into the future
No promises

The blackness rolls over
I wake up watching
Seeing me, an empty head

A last torment
The blackness waiting to guide me
Leaving me to watch