Two player game - Be More Chill
( One player game rewrite - Your Local Grocery Store )

~

Apocalypse of the teens
Level 9
The cafeteria

Find the bad guy, push him aside.
Then move on forward with your books at your side.
It's a one-player game, so when they make an attack,
You know you got a backpack, gotta watch your back
Then you stay on track and
Ah! remain on course.
If they give you a smack you
Gah! use your force.
And if you leave some ******* behind it’s fine
Cause it's an effed up world,
and it's a one-player game, hey!

I like to talk about cool stuff like casettes
It's just that no one else but me really cares
I’m just a nothing in this high school scheme,
But it's no big because I don’t need a team.

I like out of print games, retro skates,
Got a Pac-Man tattoo.
Nobody here appreciates,
But soon I’ll be a student where they do.

Cause guys like me are cool in college
cool in college, yes I know.
Guys like me are cool in college,
rule in college, I wish I’d know
High school is hell, but I navigate it well.
Cause what I do,
Is I make it a one-player game!

Zombie!
Watch out!
Ah!
Wha-!?
Aww..

As loser I have fought on my own for years.
Both Nintendo zombies and these popular peers!
Now I’m stuck on a level and I wanna move on.

Just wait two years whereupon,
I’ll see that guys like me are cool in college
cool in college, won't be lame.

Dude I know, I get it-
Guys like me, they **** in college,
But I’m not in college,
I’ll be fine

High School is whack, but I’ve got my own back.
It’s me and books, I make it a one-player game.

AH-
OH-
ZOMBIE!
BLOOD!
CLAWS!
Pause.

I know I’m no one’s favourite person,
But that doesn’t mean that I can't still dream.
It’s really true, I’m no one’s favourite person
I’ll always be alone on the team

High school is ****, and I don’t need (no)one conquer it.
It's just what I do,
I make it a one-player game!

Find the bad guy, push him aside.
Then move on forward with your books at your side.
It's a one-player game, so when they make an attack,
You know you got a backpack, gotta watch your back
Then you stay on track and
Ah! remain on course.
If they give you a smack you
Gah! use your force.
And if you leave some ******* behind it’s fine
Cause it's an effed up world,
and it's a one-player game, hey!
One-player game
One-player game. He-ey-ey!

I just locked myself in a bathroom stall during our school break and cried, listening to 'Michael In The Bathroom' on repeat.

I don't think I'm okay anymore

im seven years old.
why are mommy and daddy fighting?
and how d you "launder money?"
does daddy put money i the washer?
he's so silly!

i'm 11 years old.
dad never put money in the washer.
he stole it.
he's talking about moving.
what about jenny?

I'm 13 and a half years old.
I've just started hesitating when people talk.
"What's your name, girl?"
"..."
"Kylie."

I'm 15 years old.
"No, Jenny, I'm not a girl."
Where's Jason and Annabelle?
I don't consider them my parents anymore.

I just turned 17.
Eyes on a special boy.
Still dealing with Jenny.
Still alone
Maybe I don't wanna be the lost 7 year old anymore.

Always the loser, never the star.
Always bullied, always ignored.
One day, he finds a SQUIP.
Says it'll help him be more chill.
Sound familiar? Here's the trick:

SQUIP is Keanu?
Well, who cares?
It will help,
Heere the Loser
Be more chill.

"That's... a girl's shirt."
Here, just follow my lead!
"So, come here often?"
"N-yes!"
Mr. Jeremy, just, say what I do!

"So, who is this chick?"
"Madeline Miller. She's... French."
"No she isn't, she just fakes it!"
Nice going Hamlet. Be more chill.

It's suddenly Halloween.
How'd it go by so quick?
Seems like just yesterday,
He'd been ignored.

Suddenly, he wasn't so forgotten.
He has a girlfriend,
Who loves him for him.
Her best friend though-
Is on a mission.

What happened at the party?
Some may ask.
It's complicated, though,
I'll tell you a flash.

Chloe kissed Jeremy.
Then did Jake,
Christine lost Jake.
And...

"Rich set a fire!"
"He knew he was gay!"
"He fled to Bombay!"
Stop the rumors! Stop the taunts! Stop it! Stop it!

What the hell?
Is it seriously the play?
Seems like just yesterday,
"Rich melted his head!"

"This is too good for a **** school play!"
"They've all been SQUIP'd..."
"Am I bi...?"
"How bad are the rumors?"
"Michael, here to save the day!"

Find the Red.
Luckily he's so old school
Drinks discontinued drinks...!
"Michael!"

Voices are gone...?
How could that be?
"Hey Christine?"
"Lunch, just you and me?"

That is the end,
Of this happy tale.
Now finally,
They're all living free.