I've always hated the beach but I've been going every week and soaking myself in salt water because I keep thinking I'll see him on the other side of the ocean. I like to watch the blues and greens beneath me and imagine it's his eyes. I look up at the sky and envision his fingertips dancing on my back like droplets, his lips running along my shoulders. Sometimes I think I can swim to him, like maybe if I held out my hand far enough I could reach him.