read some
philosophy books
it says
most of the men's
have ***
out of lust
but
women's
it's an extension
of love…

Change,  the toughest thing going....
Change,  the most sought after thing....

They tell me
"You must be traumatized, honey"
"Are you sure you're okay?"
After what I've seen, most people
Go insane

Yet here I am
Living life normally
And I only feel bad
Because I'm feeling nothing

"You must be traumatized, honey"
Well, should I be?
After the burning bodies I've seen

"Are you sure you're okay?"
Why would I not be?
I'm just going through life
So casually

"You should seek help"
Who could even help?
"You're too young, those memories will ruin your mind and destroy your life"
But I'm doing just fine

I don't understand
I can't comprehend
Why everyone thinks
I should be so upset

It could have been me
It wasn't
And I'm glad

My heart aches
For his death
Not for seeing him die

I have no self pity
I have no problems
I'm letting go of
The things that should cause them

Corey is gone
He's not coming back
I know that he is dead

Somewhere

Deep

      Deep

Down

But I can't accept it yet
But I do accept what happened
And I don't let myself cry
Because my tears need not be shed
Because the pain, it wasn't mine

These past few weeks
Have drained at my life
Two friends in twelve days
Tragically died
I finally chose
To go to college
I have no financial help
Because the aid never acknowledged
That my dad is being sued
By my mom who is poor
He cannot help me at all
Because he is planning his wedding
So I'm all alone
To sit here
Suffocating
I'm here all alone
Feeling the raw pain
And it's nauseating
So I struggle and try
To scrape through my life
As the world around me
Decays and dies
I have no hope
And I've never felt so alone
As a child
I was pushed into the world
To grow up too fast
And struggle to stand
My knees are weak and shaking
But here I am

White water dreaming
Behind pale velvet curtains
I sing the same song to you
Sweet summer steaming
As the wind was swirling
Your hair and your tune

Songs from the masters
Of love and laughter
Sung as the record spins 'round
I get lost in the chatter
Of what really matters
It's that I have you around

The types not romantic
Are the types that I meet
Like a lost wanderer in a storm
Before I get frantic
And cry in the street
I've got you to keep me warm

Cool, comfortable breathing
Beside the fire
Silent and perfect and still
I'm barely believing
Of you I will tire
If you want me to, I will

I am plagued with dreams
Of your face
Every night
I close my eyes
Knowing I'll see you again

I want to stay
And know it's true
But in reality you're dead
You're never coming back

I called you my friend
And I, yours
We spent so much time together
Playing guitar
Walking to the park
Going to church
Getting into trouble at school
Joking
Singing
Laughing

But never again
I will never see you again
I just want you back
I want to see you
Not in my dreams
I want reality to be
What it used to be

I'm left here alive
And you died of disease
You were so young
You were only 19

Leave me alone,
If you love me let me go,
If it's meant to be,
You'll love the real me,
Not my memory,
You wouldn't know it,
But I won't show it,
You led me to the beach,
And left my heart in the sand.