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The doors may have been shut
and the lights became dim
but through and through
I see you

Cars already passed by
Ever-green leaves turned brown
Everywhere I look
I see you

Dawn finally broke
The skies opened up and rain poured
Winds blew from north to south, east to west
But still, I see you

The days became darker
emotions felt colder
You moving farther
Anywhere, I see you

I have fought dangers
I took all the hits
I kept myself distracted
Yet, I see you

You already moved on
I only passed through
But when I look at the stars
I see you

No matter how far I try to run
How long I close my eyes
and deep my scars get
I see you

I already sold my soul to the gods,
I prayed all rituals and hymns
just to forget, but still
I see you

My heart was shattered
I lost all my strength
But whenever I feel like giving up,
I see you

Through the ripples
through the pain
through the haze of memories
I see you

I think, even if the darkness fails
Or the sun won’t shine
And rain never pours again
**I will still see you
When will you realise that its time to stop?
To stop loving,
To stop caring,
To stop chasing.

Its actually a question that you cant answer.
A story that has no ending.
A belief that has no basis.
A joke that has no sense.

You feel the need to stop but you wont,
Because it makes you feel the love,
It makes you feel the warmth,
It makes you feel the joy.

It is a never ending chase of stopping and going ahead.
It is an unreasonable excuse to stop pushing and pulling back.
It is a joke that you put on yourself,
Yet somehow, sometime, somewhere, you need to stop

To stop the pain,
The questions,
The doubts,
Even the love and joy.

After all, every joke has a punchline...
Right?
When will it take for me to speak?
Will I wait?
Should I?
I don’t know.

When will I finally say,
that it’s you who makes me shiver?
When? Will it be today,
or tomorrow?

When will I see,
how pathetic I actually am?
for thinking of saying
what my heart’s screaming

When will I have the courage,
to actually say something?
After weeks, months,
or years?

Will I ever? Or not.
Should I?
No.
I will never.

— The End —