I'll always love my mother.
But I yearn to be drastically different
in the ways that I love my children.
Time and energy.
Interest and equality.
Authenticity.
Truly,  I am aware of the difficulties my mother endures.
And I can only offer prayers to Him who listens,
that I will be able to devote myself entirely.
Each child will be aware of my deep love,
compassion and care.
And never will it be a question in their young minds.
This is my prayer to Him who listens.
That I will love drastically differently,
with all of my heart.

To no one really,
I saw her again... and I loved it... I couldn't help it. She was there tonight. A white dress ******* in the back in the most childlike manner, and soft brown curls loosely falling upon light blue lace. She looked different. Perhaps she had matured since we had last seen each other... (but that wasn't very long ago). And yet there existed still a sense of familiarity, which I did not doubt would remain. We talked very little and I guessed she had forgotten about us. After all, it was years ago. But then she pulled on my hand with that same mischievous grin and dragged me to the floor. We laughed like we used to and danced for the first time. I had never been that close to her.

I saw her again... and I loved it... I couldn't help it. She stood at the bottom of my stairwell. She was watching our parents speak - so "attentively". But I knew she wasn't listening. Her attention span is far too short for meaningless small talk. My eyes always found their way back to her. Sometimes for a second, and then sometimes I would forget to look away... But she would remind me by glancing over at me. Why did I cross her mind?

I saw her again... and I loved it... I couldn't help it. We'd been keeping in touch for the first time in forever. She was there. The same girl I had always known. Straight hair and bright eyes, always with the widest smile. We spent the entire night together. Teasing, Playing, Laughing. Always laughing. And we danced. Was I the only one with tears in my eyes? I couldn't have been the only one with shaky hands and a wild heart.

I know I'll see her again... and I know I'll love it... I love her... I can't help it.

Carefully crafted, you were given to me,
on a cold winter night.
And despite the snow,
(numb toes and shaking fingertips)
the universe was in my reach,
and warmth transformed my heart.
My very being was entirely overwhelmed
(with you).
Hot tears were welcome,
as I held you.
Tightly - losing this gift was not an option.
For the feeling was too unusual,
in the most wonderful of ways,
and melodies which were ever familiar to me
had a new meaning,
and were heavily blessed with
sweet, new memories.

Inspired by musical wonders
I write this letter to you,
why shouldn't I?
There are some things vital to know,
and the foremost is the infinite universe
within you.
It's been said a million times, I'm aware.
But a mind such as yours sees these words,
and truly grasps the beautiful concept.
Look within you.
There are streams of flowing water,
roses budding in spring,
the crisp chill of autumn,
and beauty explodes with each drop that falls on your cheeks.
You are even more than this.
Stop.
Imagine what lies beyond our vast universe.
Even a beautiful mind as complex as yours cannot understand this.
And that, my friend, is where your soul lives.
So take your words, your voice, your love;
and shoot it even farther into the unknown.
There is someone that understands.

Rosalie Rose, sweet child,
named for the angels in splendor.
Rosalie Rose, what falls upon your cheeks?
This world is not for you.
The stars are your ancestors, and your closest companions.
Rosalie Rose, rest your head in my arms.
You're safe here.
Rosalie Rose, my darling dear,
let the twinkling bells of my voice soothe you,
and hang your worries upon those celestial beings.
They will not blame you for it, for you are blameless,
and worthy of all love.
And they will hurry away with your fears streaming behind,
and explode soon enough.
Rosalie Rose, sweetest child,
I offer you my all,
until the very day you join the angels in their splendor.