if ideas are lightbulbs,
my house is dark.
if ideas are fires,
mine has lost a spark.
if ideas are paintings,
my canvas is blank.
if ideas are boats,
mine just sank.

This words are my own to
scandalize, throw it directly
in your face, scream them
encrush them and swallow
in silence as a pois a porter
at a tabooed cablooed bar
drinking bottles of brewed
cougar gulping bitter pills
small tokens of forgotten
abandoned little peoples

Taboo Words:
heartbreak, blob, writersblock
anguish, drunkdead, motherfu

Words abandoned me today.
My thoughts race. No clue what I'm thinking except that I'm thinking.
I'm sleepy. I should get some rest. Probably would be for the best. But I don't want to. I don't want this miserable day to end, because I am more afraid of tomorrow. I barely eat, my hands tremble.. I'm shaky, weak, feeble, clumsy, falling.. Tired, awake, bleeding, leading myself astray.. but why?
Ironically because all I am feeling is sadness and pain. You flow in my veins but the weight of my love for you is simply to great. So I endure but I don't want to. I want to give up but I can't. I want to stop but I can't. I'm tired of fighting but my mind and body simply won't stop to rest. I don't want to die yet this seems like this will be a fight to the death..and I don't want to give in to my desire to see you.. it's frail and it hurts so I keep it close and deny. But I can't help but accept that without you I will die, this frail part of me that I hold so close to my side.. And when I show this side I can only show that I care. Stevie has writersblock so I wrote this poem as your dad.

i'm losing this patience of mine
it's the struggle of writersblock all the time
they ask how i am and i say i'm just fine but i'm dying inside
i can't swallow the truth cause i'm choking on pride
guess i love you so much that you're stuck on my mind
it's love that you want and it's love that you find
you say you have love for me but it's not the right kind
so here i go again losing my mind

cause i love you so much that it hurts, that it hurts
"you know that i love you" those are the words, those are the words
that i need to hear, that i need to hear
cause i miss you, i miss you
when you aren't here, when you aren't here
but the truth is it hurts even more whenever you're near, whenever you're near

you're laughing at me and that's the last thing you should do
cause i'll strap you to bomb and i'll say you just blew
you're still trying to laugh but i see you're almost crying
and i'm on the floor laughing so hard that it feels like i'm the one who's dying
but atleast when i die, i will die with a smile
in life, pain comes so cheap meanwhile
anything that's worth having just doesn't come easy
my rapping is cheesy and so is your boyfriend who guarentees he
will you love as long as you love him which means he
just wants you to **** him and right after you ****** him
and he came on your face, he goes back to his place
and you feel bad for yourself cause you're a ******* disgrace
your love is like a cloud and i'm in for the chase
but he beat me to it so i came second place
i once had this dream where i ****** you in space
where no one could here you scream while i slide in third base

cause i love you so much that it hurts, that it hurts
"you know that i love you" those are the words, those are the words
that i need to hear, that i need to hear
cause i miss you, i miss you
when you aren't here, when you aren't here
but the truth is it hurts even more whenever you're near, whenever you're near

and to anyone out there who think he can test me
you think you're better than me but the fact is
i'll beat you in practice and slaughter you in a track diss
your girl comes to me and says "i want to jack this"
this is what life's all about, the best ******* advice is to just use your mouth
and right after she ****** this, i looked and said **** this
that ***** is so ugly, i'll never let her **** me