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Sarah Spang Sep 2016
I want I need
To consume, to control
To stifle the hunger
And silence the hole.
Ravenous fire
I spread forth and writhe
In wake of destruction
I leave none alive.
Sarah Spang Sep 2016
I said I'd wait a thousand years
A thousand years I've waited
The fragile seeds of hope I've hewn
Have blossomed forth-
And faded.

The span of time, the falling sand
That journeys down the glass
Has shivered down to rest against
The last wish of the past

Words I've writ of you by night
Have lightened now by day
Would that I could read them now
I'd not hear what they say.

Truthfully, the beauty of a newly conjured flame
Undeniably must end
When met with winter rain.
Sarah Spang Aug 2016
Hopeless poisoned
Precious one
The drowning's only half the fun.

Submerge, submerse
Sink deeply now
I'll close my eyes
And follow down.
In mud and muck
We'll sink and choke
We'll dine on fear
And purge on hope
And when our lungs
Draw deep for breath
We'll exhale smoke
We'll feast on death.
Sarah Spang Jul 2016
Quenched your thirst with nothingness
That final night we spoke,
Strangled by the Dragon's claws
Until your wristwatch broke.

It stained your lips, your fingertips
The membrane of your nose;
The queerest shade of mushroom blue
I'd ever then behold.

And were it not for breathlessness
That swallowed up the sound
I'd found the shade befitting of
The body on the ground.

As children, brave, you sailed away
More places than I'd go.
I followed each resounding path
And lived as your echo.

Motivation to taste the dregs
Of an oblivion
Was not a path I'd trace myself
Or follow where you'd been

I broke off, denied the blue
Before it stained me dead
I should have stayed a pace behind
To share the way I'd tread

You're Peter Pan at twenty-two
And nevermore a day
I watched the stars up in the sky
And saw you sail away.


Your wristwatch, though broken
Still clicks on in my head
The last place that you're breathing now
In dreams that grace your stead.




I never could quite come to tell you
I dreamt of drowning in one ocean
For the rest of my days.
Sarah Spang Jul 2016
These days it feels like I've traversed
A whole entire universe
Yet two decades with one year shy
I'm slowing down at Twenty Five.

Short of breath, I close my eyes
Yet keep the inner open wide
Upon a place that won't exist
Unless I choose to reminisce

Sleeping bleeds the staunched off wound
Once bound and kept from swollen eyes
And in the welling, gaping maw
I see the truth swept in the tide.

The sleeping gaze, turned inward then
Sees faces I won't see again
The lover I once washed away
Sweeps shore-ward, where he'll always stay

Within my skull, against my mind
Beneath the dreaming cobalt sky
The softest skin, the sweetest sin
Will always fill my dreams with him.
Sarah Spang Jul 2016
I want the jagged forest line
Against the setting sun;
The smear of black across the sky
Where night had just begun.

I miss the way the silhouettes
Of Trees did frame that sky,
The inky way it scrawled across
The blue in craggy lines.

I want the silver moonlight tipping
The horizon-line
To glaze the earth in black and white
And cloak the looming pines.

I miss the sprawling milky way
That luminescent stream
That cut across the onyx sky
Within the starry sea.
Sarah Spang Jul 2016
It's Novocaine, in a way
Slathered over my brain
In a chemical cocktail
That's supposed to keep my mind
From the endless cycle of self imposed
Punishment.
There's no On or Off
And therein's the problem
Capping off something
With no particular filter.

To clarify, I'm a bit all or nothing,
And the promise of peace they gave me
Also implied artistry of my thoughts;
The conversely sharp and wonderful inner workings
That once gushed forward effortlessly
Are locked up inside in the plugged up
Pool of sludge.

What a paintbrush they have these days,
Drenching things in black and white;
I see the logic in settling, to gripping these little oval promises
Of a better life for sanity.
This cold clarity enables me to remember
What once was with a measured calculation
Of the good weighed against the bad.

Grey is a foreign object after my descent into the Matrix
Red pill, Blue pill,
I finally understand Cipher.
Somethings are better left unknown
Sometimes ignorance IS bliss.
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