It's been a while since I have held you
You haven't changed much.
Still poised as ever, sharp with your words.
You make it quick.

I didn't expect to ever see you again
But I have been thinking about you.

I wrote a love-letter to my demons
on the soft, tainted skin
of your back.

Sin has a name
Shaded on you,
in black.

The glamorous are gangrenous thieves
Distracting whilst the govern steal Liberty
   Popsicle mushrooms 5 o'clock news and beer
Lies clear as the Rays of Day's shine
                served like cheap red wine with a side of fear.
Seize your own freedom      Shun the sun
   Abandoned Divine                      Dismay
                              ­              Race the tick of the tock
                                          Watch your sanity fray
                                            Hop on one of the slimeways
                                           ye 'ole snail
                                                left trekked along
                                                        across the Highway
                      Humming it's long low slow song
        sung, in rhythm with a thousand toothed tongue, out of tune
           Forever dragging along the crazy round home of a loon.
   The wild yonder awaits Tecciztecatl's return
           Saliva soaked foot pushes off
             this road of hellish burns
   The blue openly longingly yearns
                  for that moment not too soon                        
                                    ­                                          as shade befell                                  
   the conscious snail fully aware wanes into it's cognitive shell
                    His cocooned spiraled tomb
                           Hung high again as the moon
         Shedding light on the treacherous troubles we're in
         until the sun comes back 'round to illume again

I'm done



with love.

with you
and
you

and you



and especially
you.


I don't need ***
i don't want
skin

i tear it all
away



and start over



but

please know

that i'm sorry
that i hurt you


but from the start,
i told you

that the boys fall in love with me

and i never love them back.

Did you know that life had teeth?
                    Did you think you'd be devoured?
                          Do you really think you'll see it coming
            in that fateful hour?
                Have you ever blamed the future for things
            that haven't happened yet?
                  Have you ever tried to get your god  
             to take a sucker bet?
                      Have you ever been in a moment
             that you knew was very Rare?
                        Did you share it with excitement and no one
              really cared?
           Can moments last forever, or are they all doomed
                               to  vanish into thin air?
                        Has wisdom ever rained upon you
               and messed your pretty hair.
                                  Do you often feel confined and forced
                     to sublimate your needs?
                                             Have you given up your lust
                                     for a down payment on some fools greed?

I fell for you
Under the stars of a cloudless night
A night the big dipper shone so bright
You could see the water spilling out of it
Falling into the little dipper
Then over flowing into our hearts
I fell for you

I fell for you
Under the soft glow of a distant street light
As we swayed on swings
And I watched the rays of light
Play hide-and-seek with your skin
Trying to catch you still enough
So it could glow you like an angel
I fell for you

I learned of you
Through back channel grape vines
And locker door vents
Four AM phone calls that left crickets jealous
Listening to our heavy breaths of in love dreams
Pass through the receivers
I learned of you

I learned of you
Through tears that might as well have been daggers
Stabbing my heart
As I wrestled your secrets from the back of your mind
Through your tear ducts
And kidnapped your true feelings
In body bags from the bottom of your heart
I learned of you

I stayed with you
When learning wasn’t fun anymore
But our hearts weren’t settled in
And the comfort of silence
Fell to the wayside of sin
And your brain made your heart feel used
And your heart made your body feel abused
And your body made my heart feel abused
I stayed with you

I stayed with you
When stars were no longer visible
Drowned out by city lights
And crickets were silenced in fear
By the sounds we made at night
And surprises and picnics
Were just apologies
And our song was just a reminder
Of what I forgot about you
I stayed with you

I fell for you
Down a flight of stairs on a rainy night
When our lips didn’t mind the company
Of staring eyes
And your ferruled eye brows
Reminded the big dipper how to shine
I fell for you

I fell for you
Barefoot in sand the sun shining down
On a comfortable day in June
Which came so soon the sun hadn’t left his mark
On our left ring fingers yet
The waves from the ocean weren’t crashing the rocks
Letting the priest preach his sermon in peace
Whose words we couldn’t hear
Staring straight into your eyes
I fell for you

I fell for you

I fell in love with a blackboard
and the beauty etched upon it's surface.
(A shallow love, indeed: to only love what is written and to never understand.)
But my hands can never touch it, never,
for it's texture makes me sick.

I fell in love with a train,
and all of that thrill and wind and speed.
(A dangerous love, please: to only love a fleeting feeling, the never calm.)
But that scent is so appalling, crawling
upon my knees to escape it's grasp.

I fell in love with a princess,
and her eyes, stance, and *******.
(A quick love, sick: Her hands seemed to bandage my heart so nimbly.)
But my ears are bleeding, always pleading,
at the sound of her treacherous voice.

I fell in love with a peasant,
his smile, his heart, and his arms.
(A beating love, fleeting: His face tear stained with stress.)
But he had no time for me, no dime
in his pocket could feed me.

I was alone. Never quite in love enough.
The polymer casing on my blood seemed to break.
The walls had yet to rise with the celibate gathering.
Take away a lifetime and give away a second.