sankavi

sankavi Feb 2021

and at the end of it all, will the abused become the abuser?
will the manipulated become the manipulator?
will the sky fall beneath our feet with the green grass above our heads?
will we begin to breathe fire and live underwater?
will she stop chasing the ones who will never love her?
and will he finally let in the ones who truly love him in?
will the world stop spinning?
will the universe stop expanding?
will the sun and the moon stop loving each other?
will we live until tomorrow?
will we fall in love again?
will we find out we were never meant to be?
will all the flowers rot?
will the snow stop falling?
will the fires burn out?
will we be happy?
will we finally begin to feel again?

sankavi Feb 2021

love

love is overrated
and too complicated anyways

i write too much about "love"

#love

sankavi Feb 2021

unwanted

you make me feel unlovable
you make me wonder why I'm not good enough
why I will never be enough for you

#love #unloved #feature

sankavi Feb 2021

my love for you

i don't understand my love for you

sometimes i love you as a bee does honey
but other times i love you as if I am fire and you are a huge tide destined to put me out

sometimes my love for you is pure, all i wish for is you to be happy
and other times my love for you is full of hate and anger

sometimes i hate you more than i love you
and in a matter of seconds, I love you more than I've loved anything else

my love for you is chaos, toxic, and unfulfilling
our love is bound to end in bright red, orange, and blue flames that will consume every bit of us

but until the end, my love for you will burn

#love #pain #depression #happy #sad

sankavi Feb 2021

something out of reach

this hope for a happiness that would last more than a couple of hours fills my head
how amazing would that be
a happiness that wouldn't come crashing down as soon as my mania is over

#love

sankavi Feb 2021

love me the way i loved him

I wonder if anyone could ever write about me the way I wrote about him.
if anyone could describe me using colours and smells
the way he reminded me of the colour green and smelt of fresh coffee on an early morning
I wonder if anyone could ever pay close attention to every little detail about me so they could later write it down
like how I wrote about every little freckle on his face, and how his hair fell perfectly above his beautiful brown eyes that glistened in the summer sun
could anyone write about me, creating a beautiful symphony of words?
is that so crazy to want?
someone to finally love me the way that I loved him, someone to finally see my soul instead of the shell that I live in
to be fascinated in figuring out how my brain works and what makes me who I am
I want someone to want to know every little detail about me like how I wanted to know him

#love #poem

sankavi Feb 2021

the way i wanted you

all I wanted was for you to love me
the way one loves the sun shining so bright on a cold winter day
the way one loves seeing the rain on a sunny day
the way one loves the beauty of lightning and the strong thunder coming after

all I wanted was you to feel the way you felt when you heard your favourite song for the first time, and then how you felt when you sang that perfect song over and over again on repeat

I wanted you to feel free with me
like how I feel picturing myself running through a large green field with a rainbow of the most beautiful wildflowers

I wanted you to want me, like really want me
the way that I want you, the way that I needed you

all I wanted was for you to be able to picture a future with me
it doesn't matter that a future together for us was very unlikely
I still wanted you to picture it and make plans that were never going to happen

I just wanted you to want me, love me, need me, crave me
the way that I did you

#love #happy #sad #depression #poetry