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Him
It was him.
It was always him.
He was the movement of the morning.
The tick of the clock.
He was fireflies and owls and antelopes.
He was droopy eyelids, half asleep and mumbling over his cereal.

It was never me.
I was the newspaper with nothing interesting to read.
I was heavy steps and creaky floorboards.
I was a jellyfish,
everyone loved to look at me, but no one wanted to touch me.

We were the daybreak.
The moment the sun kissed the stars, saying "here, take all that I am."
But to no avail, they faded and wandered to the other side of the world.

I'm the chase.
The sun that always wants to be beside the moon,
And sure, sometimes it looks like I made it, right?
That's all that I ever wanted, right?
But in those moments, the world is dark.
An eclipse: never fully there.

He was the stars and I was the sun.
I was chasing after him every morning,
And he ran from me.
Only, he didn't notice he was running.
At this point, it was just a cycle. A part of his routine.

And I went unnoticed.
How unfair is it that he gets all of my time,
And I am left up in the air, stranded, as another day rolls by?
No one wants to look at me, and no one wants to touch me.
Nonetheless, I chased and I chased and I still-

Loving him was the best and worst decision I ever made.
Don't be scared, Love;
show me your scars.
Give me a piece of your soul,
and maybe a glimpse of your mind.

I could show you beauty,
without a field of flowers.
And an amazing high,
without the foul aftertaste.

Just let me in,
let me feel your pain.
I'll touch your soul,
and make you go insane.
2/19/2017
You sit patiently
            in the back of my mind;
A cold and barren place,
            but safe
      from the monsters I made.
....the thoughts that bled through to Saturday morning
Now we are standing in the attic,
gazing face to face.
What you said awhile back was different,
which left my mind caught in a haze.

Last time I was about to confess my feelings,
but you gallantly pushed me away.
I stormed down weeping,
hoping you'd stop me and ask me to stay.

Now we're back at the same position,
but really not quite the same.
You profess that you didn't meant your words,
and so your love you excitedly proclaim.

I have always wanted for you to say this,
now my own heart has been torn to two.
I shakily told you it's too late,
I'm already engaged to someone new.
this is about will and tessa, really. it's very heartbreaking.
may i always write words more naked than flesh,
more stronger than bone,
more sensitive than nerve.
may i always dip my finger into rivers of ink that will never run dry.
on the days i am not an ocean or a shipwreck,
may i always become an anchor.
may i understand that somedays words are a bridge,
and others are the fire that burns them.
that sometimes i write the words,
and that sometimes the words write me.
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