Writers are humble beings.
We are not arrogant,
Mighty,
Or triumphant.
We are merely the artisans of words
That will forever exist.
We mold what we already know
Into a black and white painting of what we don't know.
To better understand
Ourselves,
Our world,
And worlds beyond us.
Between keyboard taps,
Pencils that scratch,
And minds that rage on.

We rarely ever write about
Ourselves.
If we do, it is only our perception of ourselves.
We do not brag,
Only tell,
Perspectives,
Views,
Arguments.
We use characters to view the world sometimes.
The morbid words come together nicely.
They say something loud and wonderful,
Yet too often the words are mistaken for
Personal
Feelings.
When that is not the case at all.

We live through our writing
Our imaginations.
That is how we thrive.
Little notebooks are scattered
On bookshelves and desks
Around the house.
Reminders scribbled on lined,
Unlined,
Stationary paper.
Random words,
Quotes,
Brilliant ideas.
Ideas that will be
Unused,
Forgotten,
Misplaced.

But the important part is not
That we are writers.
The important part is
That we have readers
And we owe it  to those
Readers
To put forth the beautifully
blunt,
Excruciating
Truth.

Don’t you remember when you could go out to dinner and be seen?
Don’t you remember when you weren’t talking to a screen?
Neither do I
I look around to see people’s faces
Just to find them looking down
Those screens are consuming
Our connections are weakening
And no, I’m not talking Wireless, Broadband, or DSL
I’m talking about our families, friends, and even nature
Sure, technology is helpful in many ways
But have you realized how much we are on it every day?
An hour or 3, maybe even 4
Our thumbs constantly moving
Eyes constantly scrolling
Fingers constantly liking
Take a minute to go see a sunset
And not just in a photo
Take a minute to really enjoy it
Is there a feeling of relaxation
Don’t you like not looking through a screen?
Let’s lift up our heads once in a while
Talk to family and friends
Because we never really know when they’ll be gone.
This wasn’t meant to scrutinize others
But to give them some time to think
Because as we all know,
Our Connections are weakening

I am the wind
I am the fire in my eyes
I can see the backdrop of black and every color in between
My life has danced between black and white
My name is a whisper
Barely heard
Everybody recognizes but no one cares
I danced with darkness and slept in light
Blamed my life
I am my life
People realized I hear everything
And I can see the small things change
I wonder if people see me analyze everything
With my two sharp eyes
They flick in between people
My name is Makenzie
And I am me!

Aw yes the blood flowing through my veins
My beating heart that comes to a end
I stand staring at what I thought was love
Then I look around and all I see is blood
I smirk then smile
Knowing your time has come.
If only you knew what you could become
So yes the blood that's flowing through our veins
Can be lost
With a simple cut of a knife
You have to ask
Do I truly want this?
Yet when you see every one bend down
You come to horrendous thought
Everyone looks but no one sees
The pain that's inside of me
One heart sticks out
You contemplate
Can I make that heart stay?
One month six days
Then you feel a cut
You said you promises
A promises you broke
Know we go on with life
Like nothing ever happened
But I feel it in the back of my mind
The fact that maybe you could have been the one
Then I remember the knife being turned
I can't fall asleep without seeing your pretty face
Yet I know when I'm not wanted
I know when I have been tossed aside
Just like a shot gun shell which the angel shot at me
I fell in love
And every calls it infatuation
But I not infatuated
My heart is still beating
Though nobody cares
My pain is still real
Although everyone tells me theirs
I can't breathe some nights
Because all I smell I you
You broke my soul and stabbed my heart
Even though my heart is still beating
I look around and see one thing
The heart that stuck out
Was the heart that broke mine
My heart still beats
And when its done
I hope its because of something fun
I dont want pain
I dont want death
I just want love
Like the next person
I want weirdos
I want nerds
I want people who make me feel good
I want my heart to beat faster for someone
Then someone to just say that
We aren't good
I want someone who loves me like I love them
I want the perfect person
But no one is perfect
Yet when I see the smiling faces
I realize
I want what they have
Someone to talk and laugh with
Someone to share secrets
Then I see the 1 month 6 days
I flinch away
I dont want a month and so days
I want forever and always
Yet it always out of my reach
My first heart is gone
I'm on to a second life
I start at the placed I save
And still couldn't get it right
I smile and wave
Even though I want to cry
When I'm alone is finally
The time the tears fall
They couldn't have fallen they crashed
Crashed through the dam
And onto my cheeks
Then I see the very bad thing
Someone walks in
The dam closes.
I wipe away the tears
I face the person
She stands with frown on her face
Short pretty hair and a glare that's not meant for me
I blink she's still there
She's come to haunt me now
She's alive but I am still in love
Then I look away
I can't stand the sight
I saw her in dreams mutilated
But when she is fine and safe I can't stand it
She broke me and she is still whole
I just want to be whole
The heart that beats is mine
It's beats with a thud
I imagine the day it stops
Everyone stares at me
I am the center of attention
I dont want this
I want freedom
I have trapped my heart
It howls to be free
I get colder and push everyone away
I snap in anger
I bite and scratch
Then I awake
It was only a dream
But the heart ache is real
I look around and see my sisters
They smile and laugh
My brother is being rude like always
Then I  notice the shadow
The shadow is me
I hang in the background with my gloomy mood
I get asked to do things
I do them
Then I remember when I was happier
No has noticed that after she broke up with me I have been crawling back in my shell.
I feel my heart thump.
I smile
It's not real
No one knows the difference so its fine
I pretend
I could be a actor
That or they choose not to confront
But I put up a show
Then I turn and run
Because whats the point if all any one wants is someone to laugh at
I sit down and think
Am I really worth all this pain?
I look up and spot a light
I smile
A actual smile
One that makes my eyes light up.
She has come to save me
My grandma Jane
I hop up and run to her
Darling are you okay?
I hear her ask
No I'm not. My heart and soul have been broken.
She smiles
It will all get better
The last thing she said before she disappeared
I have hope
The heart of mine is beating
That's all I need to know everything happens for a reason.
I'm in invincible now.
I have knowledge
I have my beating heart
I walk out of the darkness and join the light
My eyes light up and I smile more often
The feeling of death moves away
One month and six days are just numbers
But these numbers have meaning
I'm still alive and my heart is still beating
Just because she broke my heart and soul
Doesn't mean I can't be happy
I have new knowledge
I know how to live with someone who isn't interested
I lay me head down and think
*The beating heart I hear is mine and it's going strong.

Red words in black ink,
Seductive kisses never leave
The lips of thorny roses,
Full bordeux mouth prints,
Desire for hell's angels
Unrequited, as is planned,
Pain is the ultimate man,
Hands don't approach,
Sight is as intimate as ***,
Whispers of agony,
Enjoyable as only love could be.

I wage war
That's never been seen before
Is sanity worth fighting for?
I'm not really sure

Insanity?
A calamity?
I call it individuality!

Who is Society
To create this hypocrisy?!?
It seems like such a tragedy
To waste such ingenuity
To dull the creativity