So tell me what was she to you? Was she your escape from the pain and the reality you called life. Was she the person you turned to when your hormones ran wild. She was a good girl, faithful, yet you had no intentions of making her your wife. You made it clear that wanted her body, but where in the sequence of your wants was her mind? Tell me, does your heart race and thoughts excite when you captivate the depths of her mind, or is that just when your deep in between her thighs? Did you ever stop to realise, she tried loving you with her pieces of shattered heart. Could you see that behind her smile was scars. Perhaps you were just blind or the shades that covered your eyes were to dark for you to realise. Didn't you see your future when you looked into her eyes. Couldn't you see that her love for you was filled with loyalty, did you ever see the real me? I mean HER. Did you ever see the real HER !

People judge her cause her knees have hit the floor more times to please a man that she barely even knows, than being knelt down in prayer praising a God who's works are knows. The insides of her palms know drugs, better than they've ever known prayer. She proclaims her love to men that she means nothing too, more times that she's told her own mother that she loves her. She holds on to men tighter than she's ever hugged her daughter. Reciting rap lyrics like its nothing, ask her to recite the 'our father' and she"s stuttering. Truth is.. she had to grow up too quick. Always fallen the victim to someone else opinions, truth is she just always fallen.

I knew I would hurt you
but I always lost my mind
in the presence of your ****** activities
thinking it was genuine love
pure ****** subdued our emotions
for a while our lust was fire-burning
your skin crawled to every fibre of my being
we were in love, just for a sad moment
I remember holding your hand and I got a wrath which was there
since that we are not good for one another
our paths shared the same vision
but a sad reality was a result of our endless broken dreams
our mind became blurr
dignity often obscure
the scent of your loving arms
would die freely in mine when winter comes
but my eyes went blind when I didn't see you
and my ears went deaf when I didn't hear the melody of your voice
but only the sound of an endless pain.

Bound by society,
Trying to free her wings
Balancing truth with conformities
Leaving her hung like a child on a swing.

Torn by expectations,
Each piece a clue to her mind
Ragged in clothes not hers, but theirs
Bearing with them, of her, no sign.

Leaving it, she'd attempted,
'Integrate', they said
'Lose yourself, to join us'
They could've said instead.

The only good calling off there is
Is the kind that
Calls the calling off off

Want to be together but alone
Though your heart is made of stone
Couldn't share with you my thoughts
You were never that sure about
Your feelings , always so insecure
Used me like a stepping stone
So let's pretend and remind ourselves
That our need for love has grown
I kept saying " If you go, please let me know "
I want to move on but you keep holding on , dragging me along
It's just a make believe , why can't you see
You don't love me.

I want to be susceptible to the world's most anguishing heartbreak.

I want to know torture outside prisons
and inside the hidden doors in the soul-
the ones where you stash the secrets
the truth
the unadmittable.

Looking across a roomful of people
and only seeing one
only Ever seeing one
and wouldn't it be a fairytale
if he was looking right back.

Because before heartache comes heart great.

No more "do my eyes deceive me?"
No more fantasizing what happens when hands
accidentally graze

There's no mistaking his meaning.

Like Love poems in foreign languages-
you still understand every word
every sentiment
every intention.

And while the world keeps spinning
and the noise gets louder and louder

We will retreat into our own quietness.

Where we will stay for
a long
long

time.