You don't feel the tight skin.
You don't hear the buttons pop.
You don't feel the seams rip.
You don't see my mirror.
You tell me I look healthy.
You tell me I have cute curves.
You tell me I need to eat.
But you don't understand.
When you are asking me to eat,
You are asking me to give up.

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I'm this way.
  I don't try to be sad.
I'm sorry that you worry about me.
  I'm not worth the time.
I'm sorry I'm a disappointment.
  I want to make you proud.
I'm sorry that I lie to you.
  Its just to protect you.
I'm sorry that I am so busy.
  I need more time.
I'm sorry that I am so closed off.
  I don't want to hurt you.
I'm sorry that I am
Broken
Lost
me.
I'm sorry that I want to die.
  I know its selfish.
I love you.

Sparkling dresses. Fake smiles. Loud music. Dancing. Pointless hellos.
lipstick
Blood. Bathtub. Sink. Curling iron. Water.
Goodbye written across the mirror in
lipstick
Black dresses. Fake comfort. Loud silence. Staring. Lasting goodbyes. Death.
lipstick.

I'm sitting on the edge of a cliff just waiting for the ground underneath me to
g i v e
Maybe if I was more grateful.. maybe I just need to stop being so selfish and
g i v e
I should just take my life and let someone else have the responsibility. I will just
g i v e
g i v e
g i v e
Its all I can do other than taking.

I stare at the shattered glass on the floor.
Why hasn't it broken before.
Maybe it was tired of getting
Touched
Bumped
Dropped
Used.
If I were the glass I would have shattered too.
I think in a way I am the glass
Shattered on the floor.
There's only pieces of me left.
Be careful parts of me are sharp
Sweep me up with a broom
Let the world devour me.
Let me poke little holes in the trash bag.
I may be pieces
But I never disappeared
completely