I guess you could call me a bit of a *******,
because whenever you ripped my heart from my breast,
I felt nothing but pure ecstasy.
I didn't think I could ever get rid
of the only thing that reminded me of you.

When I first met you, I'll admit I was a mess
But you were too
Our nights were filled with talking till dawn
And I love you
But this was back when you showed me off like a prize
When I finally realized
I don't need to starve or cut to feel something
I just need to look into your eyes

But now everything seems to have changed

When I say I love you it feels hollow
And you pretend you didn't hear
When I touch you I feel a shock
But you seem to disappear
You no longer parade me around
You seem to be ashamed
Because you hide me like a secret
And don't mention my name

And speaking of my name
Why the **** don't you repeat it
When it spills out of your mouth
Why does it sound like *******
Why do you only stare at me
Until the morning comes
Why can't you show your feelings
You make me feel dumb

For putting all this trust in you
And taking a shot
By honestly answering every question
Whether you told the truth or not
I tried to believe you
I tried so hard to change
But I guess you just won't make it
To meet me in the rain

And ya I ******* miss you
But I bet you don't miss me
So I'll open up my chest
And take my heart off of my sleeve

If you could spend one month in my body
and experience even a fraction of what I've been through
you'd be screaming with apologies for what you did.

But that isn't possible.

So instead you're here, telling me I'm a priority,
when in fact, you were no where to be found
when I needed someone the most.

Where were you when I was crying myself to sleep
for days that became weeks that became months?

Where were you when my mind collapsed in on itself
and the only thing I could think about was death?

Where were you when I ******* needed you?

You have no right to show up after the curtain has fallen,
your time in my life is over and I'm certain about that.

I deserve better than you ever gave me.
I do.

And frankly, I'd rather be alone
than have to rely on you for a single ******* thing.