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meana Nov 2016
we thought death could end things.
we thought death could settle things.
we thought we can get over our problems through, death.

little did we know that we are actually, really, leaving our problems and misery behind for our family and loved ones to bear. we as normal humans think that we know a lot, but actually

we don't.

why are we questioning God's work when we ourselves can't even describe our feelings or whatever is spinning around in your head or even, even the pain you feel when you accidentally knock your head on the wall. all you will or could say is,

it hurts.

how does it hurt?
where exactly is it hurting?

you don't know.
clearly.
you never do.
we never do.

but our self-centred egoistic stupid mind controls us whilst our heart calls upon us to goodness with its faint voice as our mind overpowers our heart.

listen. listen to what's inside. listen to what the world is trying to tell you. the world speaks through your heart. all your mind does is judge whilst your pure, sacred heart, will always see the good in others.

so take good care of your little heart, we were taught by our beloved Prophet SAW on ways to clean ourselves and make our hearts pure again.
do not lose hope in Allah because He does not lose hope in His best creations. He has been searching for you, why aren't you answering His call?

day and night, you're busy taking care of your business while you forget to take care of The One who gave you, your business. The One who gave you air to breathe and space to roam.

take a break.
breathe.
think.
and be grateful.
be grateful
meana Sep 2016
people are born with a nature of having good perceptions towards others.

but some of us misuse the advantage and manipulate others into thinking that everyone is kind and noble.
people often seek protection from people who they think are the good ones.

we trust people too easily.

we often forget that many people, many hearts, many minds. some are only taking advantage of whatever you have.
be careful
be safe
meana Aug 2016
it has been a long time since i've wrote anything here
so
i am very sorry that i am not worthy enough and i have nothing as valuable to be given back to you.

i have and have not been so poetic lately even though i have so many jumbled up thoughts that could be made into stories that people wouldn't understand just like how i don't understand myself so i don't know how to portray my feelings through words other than having a lame and boring result like this one (and now it feels like a blog more than a poem entry)

**sorry
meana Jun 2016
is that it?

if it is,
please remember:
-that i will always be here for you
-that i will always be longing for your words
-that i will always look out for you
-that i care about you
-that you are loved
-me
take care, dear
  May 2016 meana
Autumn
I’d like to go on living like none of this ever happened.
But I can’t.
Because it’s still my reality.
And it will be my reality even if you’re not around.

They say you can’t change a man, not to even try.
But I did.
I tried.
I spent hours praying,
I spent days crying,
I spent an eternity trying to mold and shape you into what I thought you were supposed to be,
Into who I saw you could be.

I know it’s not my job,
I know I shouldn’t have even tried.
I broke all the pieces of myself,
And the pieces of my own heart in the process
Before you could even break me.

I always picked up the pieces left over from you;
From your heartbreaks and your hardships.
All I ever wanted was you.
And now I’m left still behind you
Picking up the pieces of myself that you broke
Filling all the holes that you punctured through.

You didn’t mean to hurt me, this was never your intention.
But I’m broken,
I’m torn,
I’m hurt.
You were caught in the middle of two ways to hurt me,
And somehow, you chose the worst one.

How can I believe someone that completely ruined my trust?
Chewed it up, spit it out, and you don’t seem to care.
Yet, in the deepest parts of me I still trust you.
You’re still my home.
And I shouldn’t have put that much of myself into someone when I’m only eighteen.

I’m afraid the only thing that’s going to fix me is the same thing that broke me.
You.
  May 2016 meana
Lorvenslypetitfrere
Do not stand on my grave and cry
I am not there, i dont sleep
I dont eat
I am a thousands word that blow through the wind
I am a diamond that shine on snow
I am the sunlight that give you light
I am the gentle autumn rain that give you water,
When you awaken in the mornin'g darling hush
I am the swift upon your skin
I am the quiet birds that chant in your head
Do not stand on my grave and cry
Be happy.
meana May 2016
i've been wondering what am i actually doing here, being present, playing a role in your story of life. i've been thinking about what am i supposed to do after i've put in all the efforts i could possibly have and able to do, in order to make you feel better, to make you smile. i am out of ways but i refuse to give up. so, i'll still be here, just in case if you need a friend.
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