They stopped checking the clock.
Not because time healed anything,
but because time
stopped asking if they were okay.

Some days wore the face of routine,
brushed teeth,
answered calls,
nodded in the right places.
But beneath the rituals,
something hollow played house.

The heart became a landlord
of too many vacant rooms.
Echoes moved in.
Old voices. Unsent replies.
The kind of silence
you can trip over.

They tried planting hope in old soil,
but nothing took root.
Even sunlight felt staged,
like a set piece in a play
they forgot the lines to.

Laughter?
It came like a guest who forgot to knock,
stayed too long,
left without saying goodbye.
They didn’t chase it.
They just cleared the cups.

There were no breakdowns.
Only hairline cracks,
quietly running their course
through bone and habit.

People called it strength.
But it was mostly muscle memory.
The body, after all,
learns how to stand
even when the soul
has long sat down.

They stopped writing about healing.
Started writing about ceilings,
how low they felt,
how often they collapsed
without warning.

And still,
they kept walking.
Not forward,
not toward anything.
Just…
walking.

Because the cruelest part of pain
is that it doesn’t always scream.
Sometimes,
it just stays.

Today's the day, with
  Hope, an confidence,
   I will stare.
As "kisunla" flows, from
an IV, to my vein,
   from an infusion
     chair.
Hoping the "Present Me"
  In the future: will,
     "Still Be"
          There.

i look at your picture hanging on the wall
memories come back as the teardrops fall
all the good times that i knew i can plainly see
of the love i knew when there was you  and me

you still  wear the smile that i used to know
when you looked at me gave my heart a glow
now is just a memory of the love gone  bye
and a  picture of you that always makes me cry

wishing you were here once again with me
in love again once more like we used be
see your smile again that i always  knew
there on your picture that i have of you

always thinking of you every single say
love i have for you will never go away
memories we knew i can still recall
when i see your smile  my teardrops start to fall

Never knew this before:
waves of fatigue, like
walking miles on the beach
avoiding the water
coming in, pulling out
in an ongoing motion
of force and eternity

The waves rising inside
from the toes to the cheek
and up into the brains
where they urge to lie down
and rest

Tide and time together
holding your hand,
whispering promises
of strength and recovery
around the next turn
at sea

Eelco van der Waals
7 August 2025

Two things
That distances people,
Money
And
The hurt words from your
Tongue.
8/8/2025

Hard to look in the eyes of others,
Hard to meet a single one.

One can’t—
Love shines bright, too bright to face.
Shy,
(The other might see it in your gaze)

One can’t—
Because all they see is hatred, too much to face
Loathed,
(The other see it on your face)

Baffling,
maddening.

Hard to look in the eyes of others,
Hard to meet a single one.

One can’t—
Because all they see is a rotten soul,
Cursed stain.
(The other leans in, wants to know.)

One can’t,
Because the other is too noble.
Too poor to claim.
(the other scoffs, doesn't want to know your name)

Perplexing,
Bewildering.

Hard to look in the eye of others,
Hard to meet a single one.

One can’t—
Because they respect,
Young,
(The other doesn't.)

One can’t—
Because they are guilty,
Griefed,
(The other is malice.)

Oh—
Dear,
The world is cruel
The world is frayed.

Cupboards are bare
Refugees die
War and hatred
Make children cry.
Playgrounds are closed
Books are not read
Eyes of the children are
Full of dread.
Schools become hospitals
Propaganda will rule
People hate people
The child becomes fuel.
The flame of hatred
Is still alight today
It’s always been
This stupid way.