i was late through no fault of my own at least that's what i tell myself just one of those occasions where try as you might the universe won't allow you to leave on time standing at the threshold one final pat of pockets to check i had all that i needed looking up to gauge the need for coat or umbrella i witness an inhumane globule of avian faeces viscous and creamy in colour and consistency exploding upon the path two steps ahead of me i see no sign of the culprit hearing only its cacophony of enjoyment or maybe disappointment drifting into the distance