i want to love myself but i don't know how drifting in and out between the reality and my delusions trying to search for that vigor that will to be alive— to be excited of the sunrise and feel calm soaking under the afternoon sun and love the changing hues of the skies at dusk and wish the moon a good night never fearing the dreams to come then adore the peeking light at dawn reflecting the days waiting to be lived
but then it's gone all that's left was a monotonous black accompanied by a crippling silence followed by the surge of doubts storming down my confidence its lightning striking as i look into the mirror staring at my silhouette with its pieces shattering one by one just as how, piece by piece i slipped into the pit freefalling and finally losing the will i tried so hard to keep leaving me with nothing but a void
i wrote this when i felt really really down, somehow it helped me release all that negativity within. i think i am better now. will be dumping my poems because it's been a while since i've posted